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Monday Mourning #979562
09/22/14 12:19 AM
09/22/14 12:19 AM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
Do what you feel in your heart to be right - for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't.
Eleanor Roosevelt (1884 - 1962)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


MURPHY'S COMBAT LAWS

Murphy's Laws Of Combat Operations


Friendly fire - isn't.

Recoilless rifles - aren't.

Suppressive fires - won't.

You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note.

A sucking chest wound is Nature's way of telling you to slow down.

If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.

Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on you.

If at first you don't succeed, call in an airstrike.

If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short.

Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.

Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.

Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.

If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.

The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack.

The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions: when they're ready. & when you're not.

No OPLAN ever survives initial contact.

There is no such thing as a perfect plan.

Five second fuses always burn three seconds.

There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.

A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.

The important things are always simple; the simple are always hard.

The easy way is always mined.

Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.

Don't look conspicuous; it draws fire. For this reason, it is not at all uncommon for aircraft carriers to be known as bomb magnets.

Never draw fire; it irritates everyone around you.

If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone.

When you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows it too.

Incoming fire has the right of way.

No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.

No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.

If the enemy is within range, so are you.

The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

Things which must be shipped together as a set, aren't.

Things that must work together, can't be carried to the field that way.

Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support.

Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather, and especially during both.

Anything you do can get you killed, including nothing.

Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you won't be able to get out.

Tracers work both ways.

If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will get more than your fair share of objectives to take.

When both sides are convinced they're about to lose, they're both right.

Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs.

Military Intelligence is a contradiction.

Fortify your front; you'll get your rear shot up.

Weather ain't neutral.

If you can't remember, the Claymore is pointed towards you.

Air defense motto: shoot 'em down; sort 'em out on the ground.

'Flies high, it dies; low and slow, it'll go.

The Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.

Napalm is an area support weapon.

Mines are equal opportunity weapons.

B-52s are the ultimate close support weapon.

Sniper's motto: reach out and touch someone.

The one item you need is always in short supply.

Interchangeable parts aren't.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SECRET OF LONG HAPPY LIFE

A man walked up to a little old lady rocking in a chair on her porch.

"I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," he said. "What's your secret for a long happy life?"

"I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," she said. "I also do a gramme of charlie a day, a spliff every night, a case of whiskey a week, eat junk food, and never exercise, and do pills on the weekend."

"That's amazing," said the man, "how old are you?"

"Twenty-four."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TWENTY WAYS TO CONFUSE SANTA CLAUS


Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds.

While he's in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a speeding ticket.

Leave him a note, explaining that you've gone away for the holidays. Ask if he would mind watering your plants.

While he's in the house, replace all his reindeer with exact replicas. Then wait and see what happens when he tries to get them to fly.

Keep an angry bull in your living room. If you think a bull goes crazy when he sees a little red cape, wait until he sees that big, red Santa suit!

Build an army of mean-looking snowmen on the roof, holding signs that say "We hate Christmas," and "Go away Santa"

Leave a note by the telephone, telling Santa that Mrs. Claus called and wanted to remind him to pick up some milk and a loaf of bread on his way home.

Throw a surprise party for Santa when he comes down the chimney. Refuse to let him leave until the strippers arrive.

While he's in the house, find the sleigh and sit in it. As soon as he comes back and sees you, tell him that he shouldn't have missed that last payment, and take off.

Leave a plate filled with cookies and a glass of milk out, with a note that says, "For The Tooth Fairy." Leave another plate out with half a stale cookie and a few drops of skim milk in a dirty glass with a note that says, "For Santa"

Take everything out of your house as if it's just been robbed. When Santa arrives, show up dressed like a policeman and say, "Well, well. They always return to the scene of the crime."

Leave out a copy of your Christmas list with last-minute changes and corrections.

While he's in the house, cover the top of the chimney with barbed wire.

Leave lots of hunting trophies and guns out where Santa's sure to see them. Go outside, yell, "Ooh! Look! A deer! And he's got a red nose!" and fire a gun.

Leave Santa a note, explaining that you've moved. Include a map with unclear and hard-to-read directions to your new house.

Set a bear trap at the bottom of the chimney. Wait for Santa to get caught in it, and then explain that you're sorry, but from a distance, he looked like a bear.

Leave out a Santa suit, with a dry-cleaning bill.

Paint "hoof-prints" all over your face and clothes. While he's in the house, go out on the roof. When he comes back up, act like you've been "trampled." Threaten to sue.

Instead of ornaments, decorate your tree with Easter eggs.

Dress up like the Easter Bunny. Wait for Santa to come and then say, "This neighborhood ain't big enough for the both of us."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


Well we are putting out the Christmas decorations at work, so I thought I'd start getting you all prepped and in the mood as it were. wink

Ho Ho Ho.... lol


I have started my days off, but I have to start them off with a trip down to the VA for labs in the morning. razz


I have a yearly check-up in a couple of weeks. yes


The worst part is fasting. rolleyes


That's why I've been pigging out tonight. snicker


I hope you all have a happy day. thumbsup



joe


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979567
09/22/14 01:05 AM
09/22/14 01:05 AM
Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 10,450
Southern California
Darlene Offline
Adept Boomer
Darlene  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 10,450
Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Hope your yearly check up goes easy peasy!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Still Sunday evening for me.....

Home from an incredible wedding weekend! Daughter's wedding was more beautiful than could ever be expected! Family, friends, all celebrating this wonderful couple! Sooooo lovely and soooooo much fun! We are so very blessed! It was lovely!

Now, I'm taking this week off from work to spend with family and friends that have come out for the wedding. So much needed.....

So.

To all abed, sleep To all awake, woot


Woohoo and booyah! smile Have an easy peasy day!
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979568
09/22/14 01:28 AM
09/22/14 01:28 AM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Haroula Offline
Adept Boomer
Haroula  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Congratulations for the wedding and best wishes for a happy life,Darlene happydance
Have all a happy day. smile wave


I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".

Re: Monday Mourning [Re: Haroula] #979582
09/22/14 05:05 AM
09/22/14 05:05 AM
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,145
Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
cailyn Offline
BAAG Specialist
cailyn  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,145
Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
Good morning Joe,Darlene,Haroula wave Bah hum bug Joe to early for xmas I say! Darlene glad the wedding was beautiful enjoy your week off!! Coffee is ready! Enjoy the day everyone sherlock


I may not have gone where I intended to go,but I think I have ended up where I need to be.

Sue
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979583
09/22/14 05:16 AM
09/22/14 05:16 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Darlene, Haroula and Sue. Joe Good Luck with your checkup. Darlene happy to hear your daughter's wedding was perfect! Enjoy your week off with family and friends. Haroula have a great day. Sue thanks for the coffee. A Happy Monday wished for All! wave wave


Gerry
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979594
09/22/14 07:32 AM
09/22/14 07:32 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers cat

Joe, hope all go well with the lab.

Darlene, glad the wedding was a success. Enjoy your visit with family.

Sue, coffee sounds wonderful.

Gerry, enjoy whatever you have on your agenda.

Haroula, happy day!

A nice dog walk this morning. Not sure what the day holds in store today. Wishing everyone a good one! lab


Gail
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979599
09/22/14 09:04 AM
09/22/14 09:04 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Joe, so I suppose they completely skipped over Halloween and Thanksgiving. lol Sounds about right. Hope everything goes well with your check up!

Glad the wedding went so well, Darlene. Have a great visit with family and friends this week. thumbsup

Have a great day, Haroula.

Enjoy your day as well, Cailyn.

Happy Monday to you as well, Gerry.

Have fun with the dog walk this morning, Gail. lab Hope you find something fun to do today.

And I've reached my final day of the four day weekend. I don't know if I'll get another one again, but this one was good while it lasted. grin I got to relax, which I very much needed after all the long days and stress of learning the new job/not knowing where I'm ultimately going. Even the previous three day weekend had the kitty version Venus crisis. Luckily, she's doing much better now. kitty

Today it still looks pretty cloudy, so I'll sing and game once again. rah Tomorrow it's back to work.

Hope everyone has a great Monday. summer


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979612
09/22/14 10:54 AM
09/22/14 10:54 AM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer
auntiegram  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
Joe don't let the vampire take too much. lol Enjoy your weekend off!! Thanks for the chuckles and have a lovely day!

Darlene so glad to hear that all went well and a lovely time was had by all. Enjoy the week off and all the out of town family and friends!! Best wishes to the "newly weds"!!! Have a lovely day!

Haroula have a lovely day!

Sue thanks for the coffee and have a lovely day!

Gerry have a nice walk and a lovely day!

Gail enjoy your walk with Nina and have fun what ever pops up to do! Have a lovely day!

venus enjoy the nice relaxing time! Glad kitty is better. Have a lovely day!

wave
Nan

Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979621
09/22/14 11:41 AM
09/22/14 11:41 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Good morning all! Lots to do today so I am flying by! I did discover today that shivering is very painful. rotfl After learning to relax my shoulder before I sneeze I was caught off guard this morning while feeding the birds in 43 degrees with no jacket. Caught me by surprise. lol

Darlene, congrats to the newlyweds! hearts

Nan, sorry you won't be nearby! I would have been available Sunday. I have out of town guests Friday and Saturday will be gone cheering on my team at the Super Spartan Race. I am so sad not to be participating.

be back


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979623
09/22/14 11:43 AM
09/22/14 11:43 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Cool, overcast and calm. Nice for a change. All Outdoorsies came for breakfast right on time. Orange kitty, who has the under throat ouchie is still healing, but looks great. Fur growing back in all over where he licked it off and the wound is about 1/4 of what it was and looking dry and good. Soon it will be gone and hopefully the fur will cover it. Poor guy looks like he's been shaved under the neck when he used to be fluffy and huge. He's bouncy and active and is gonna make it. I'm so thrilled. Outdoorsies usually aren't that resilient. Must be good bloodlines.


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979672
09/22/14 05:26 PM
09/22/14 05:26 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
One down and four to go. slapforehead


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979682
09/22/14 07:04 PM
09/22/14 07:04 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Hi Sorta and SpaceQ! Hope you are both enjoying your day!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979687
09/22/14 08:09 PM
09/22/14 08:09 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Hi Ana! I'm having a great day thank you. That power company truck that just shut off the power to the empty house made my day!


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979695
09/22/14 08:51 PM
09/22/14 08:51 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Yay Sorta!!!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979699
09/22/14 10:54 PM
09/22/14 10:54 PM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Midge Offline
Graduate Boomer
Midge  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Night all. I'm headed for bed. I have tomorrow morning off...yay See you in the morning sometime smile

Midgie hearts sleep


Just do it.
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979703
09/22/14 11:23 PM
09/22/14 11:23 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Good night, everyone. sleep


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979704
09/22/14 11:24 PM
09/22/14 11:24 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Sweet dreams all..


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Monday Mourning [Re: gymcandy1] #979712
09/23/14 12:35 AM
09/23/14 12:35 AM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer
auntiegram  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
Night everybody sleep well and pleasant dreams!

sleep
Nan

Re: Monday Mourning [Re: auntiegram] #979757
09/23/14 08:12 AM
09/23/14 08:12 AM
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 2,264
Greece
Volkana Offline
Addicted Boomer
Volkana  Offline
Addicted Boomer

Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 2,264
Greece
Good evening everyone!

Have a wonderful day!!! kissy


Fear can hold you prisoner. Hope can set you free.
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