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Law of probability. #980386
09/27/14 12:11 PM
09/27/14 12:11 PM
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 11,834
Québec
Chief Offline OP
Adept Boomer
Chief  Offline OP
Adept Boomer

Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 11,834
Québec
You may have read some of them, but they are still up to date. haha



1.Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.

2.Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible place in the universe.

3.Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

4.Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal; someone always answers.

5.Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.

6.Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

7.Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

8.Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!!

9.Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.


11.The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

12.Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

13.Law of Physical Surfaces -
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

14.Law of Logical Argument -Anything is possible IF you don't know what you are talking about.

15. Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.

16.Law of Public Speaking -- A CLOSED MOUTH GATHERS NO FEET!

17.Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store will stop selling it!

18.Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.


Chief wave


Chief
Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980387
09/27/14 12:28 PM
09/27/14 12:28 PM
Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 48,169
near Yosemite
Marian Offline
Global Moderator
Marian  Offline
Global Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 48,169
near Yosemite
These are great, Chief! Thanks! grin

Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980388
09/27/14 12:32 PM
09/27/14 12:32 PM
Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 69,973
MaG Offline
Sonic Boomer
MaG  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 69,973
lol Thanks, Chief!

Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980396
09/27/14 01:15 PM
09/27/14 01:15 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
True, all true!


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Law of probability. [Re: Sorta Blonde] #980409
09/27/14 02:41 PM
09/27/14 02:41 PM
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 13,583
Palouse country
3dobermans Offline
Adept Boomer
3dobermans  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 13,583
Palouse country
lol Had a lot of them happen.


Reading is to the mind, what exercise is to the body - Joseph Addison
Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980415
09/27/14 03:21 PM
09/27/14 03:21 PM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Haroula Offline
Adept Boomer
Haroula  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Chief! thumbsup


I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".

Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980446
09/27/14 06:35 PM
09/27/14 06:35 PM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Thanks Chief, how true. lol


Gail
Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980479
09/27/14 10:53 PM
09/27/14 10:53 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,238
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,238
In the Naughty Corner
lol Thanks Chief!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980483
09/27/14 11:22 PM
09/27/14 11:22 PM
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 19,983
Near St. Louis, MO
Draclvr Offline
Reviews Editor - Hints/Glitches Mod - Site Support
Draclvr  Offline
Reviews Editor - Hints/Glitches Mod - Site Support
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 19,983
Near St. Louis, MO
Absolutely love it!


Gardens put to bed for the winter. Time for some gaming!
Re: Law of probability. [Re: Draclvr] #980498
09/28/14 01:53 AM
09/28/14 01:53 AM
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,588
Oklahoma, USA
Homer6 Offline
BAAG Specialist
Homer6  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,588
Oklahoma, USA
Experienced a few of those. Thanks for the chuckles.


If something gets your goat, it just proves you have a goat to get.
Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980514
09/28/14 05:10 AM
09/28/14 05:10 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,099
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Online happy
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Online Happy
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,099
Marlborough USA
haha lolLoved them Chief! Made me laugh out loud! lol haha


Gerry
Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980534
09/28/14 08:18 AM
09/28/14 08:18 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 28,972
Unionville
manxman Offline
Sonic Boomer
manxman  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 28,972
Unionville
Good ones Chief. So true lol


Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.
Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980558
09/28/14 10:46 AM
09/28/14 10:46 AM
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 180
Barrackstadt, Arcadia
LeBelleRachael Offline
Settled Boomer
LeBelleRachael  Offline
Settled Boomer

Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 180
Barrackstadt, Arcadia
,,,,,,giggle! zombie


"Nobody murdered me. Or put me in a potato. Or fed me to birds. I had a pretty good life."

GLaDOS

Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980625
09/28/14 03:25 PM
09/28/14 03:25 PM
Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 3,440
47.79N, 122.24W
BobH Offline
Addicted Boomer
BobH  Offline
Addicted Boomer

Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 3,440
47.79N, 122.24W
Thanks Chief! I have one to add...

Frisbee's Law - Never precede any maneuver by a comment more predictive than "Watch this!"


Bob
As I've grown older, I've found that my memory is not as good as I used to think it was.
Re: Law of probability. [Re: BobH] #980644
09/28/14 05:17 PM
09/28/14 05:17 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
thumbsup Those are all good. lol


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Law of probability. [Re: Chief] #980651
09/28/14 06:15 PM
09/28/14 06:15 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
I think I've experienced most of them...especially the marketing one. wave


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
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