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Sip & Surf Sunday #987671
11/08/14 09:55 PM
11/08/14 09:55 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
If you wish success in life, make perseverance your bosom friend, experience your wise counselor, caution your elder brother and hope your guardian genius.
Joseph Addison (1672 - 1719)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~


The only cow in a small town in Poland stops giving milk, so the villagers buy one from Minsk for only 1,000 rubles.

Because the cow is so wonderful, they buy a bull to mate with the cow and produce more cows like it.

However, whenever the bull goes near the cow, the cow moves away.

The people are upset and decide to talk to the sage.

They tell him what's happening: "Whenever the bull approaches our cow, she moves away. If he approaches from behind, she moves forward."

The sage thinks about this for a minute and asks, "Did you buy this cow from Minsk?"

The people are dumbfounded. "Yes," they say. "How did you know?"

The sage answers sadly, "My wife is from Minsk."
~~~~~~~~~~~~

Maria is a devout Catholic: She gets married and has 17 children. Soon after the last child is born her husband dies.

A few weeks later she remarries and over the following years has another 22 children with her second husband.

After the last child is born her second husband also dies.

Within a month Maria is engaged to be married a third time. Unfortunately she becomes very ill and dies.

At her wake, the priest looks tenderly at Maria as she lies in her coffin, looks up to the heavens and says,

"At least, they're finally together."

A man standing next to the priest asks, "Excuse me, Father, but do you mean Maria and her first husband, or Maria and her second husband?"

The priest says, "I mean her legs."
~~~~~~~~~~~~


Former Vice President Quayle, Speaker of the House Gingrich, and President Clinton are traveling in a car together in Kansas.

A tornado comes along and whirls them up into the air and tosses them thousands of yards away. They all fall into a daze. When they come to and extract themselves from the vehicle, they realize they're in the fabled Land of Oz.

They decide to go see the famous Wizard of Oz. The Wizard is known for granting people their wishes.

Quayle says, "I'm going to ask the Wizard for a brain."

Gingrich responds, "I'm going to ask the Wizard for a heart."

Clinton speaks up, "Where's Dorothy?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~

Having had to take the day off work to appear in court for a minor traffic summons, the man was growing increasingly restless as he waited hour after hour for his case to be heard.

Finally, late in the afternoon, his case was called. He stood before the judge, only to hear that court would be adjourned until the next day and he would have to return.

"What!" What for?" he yelled at the judge.

His Honor, equally irritated by a tedious day and the sharp query, roared, "That will be twenty dollars for contempt of court! That's what for!"

Noticing the man checking his wallet, the judge added, "That's all right. You don't have to pay right now."

The man replied, "Oh, I'm just looking to see if I have enough for two more words!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards.

One day they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, "Now don't get mad at me.....I know we've been friends for a long time, but I just can't remember your name. I've thought and thought, but I can't recall it. Please tell me what your name is."

Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just looked at her. Finally she said, "How soon do you need to know?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~


A couple had been married for many years, and their son had gotten old enough to date. One day the boy brought a girl over to dinner. The mother was thrilled with her son's choice and couldn't wait for the wedding. However, the father was upset and, eventually, the boy asked, Dad, why don't you seem happy with her. Mom likes her a lot.

The father explained, No son, there's nothing wrong with the girl. It's just that I cheated on your mother a long time ago, and the girl you've been dating is my daughter by that woman.

So the boy dumped her and found himself another girl. Again, he brought her home to the mother's delight, but the father again told him this girl was actually his half-sister. The boy lost his temper and told his mother what his father had said.

Furious, the mother shouted, Don't listen to him, sweetheart! He isn't even your father!
~~~~~~~~~~~~


Donald Rumsfeld gave the president his daily briefing. He concluded by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."

"OH NO!" the president exclaimed. "That's terrible!"

His staff was stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the president sat, his head in his hands.

Finally, the president looked up and asked, "Just how many is a brazillion?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


I am just three more days away from a week off. yay


That's the good news. thumbsup


We've been having gorgeous weather the last few days, while I've had to work, and waiting for my week off to move the big stuff. yes


Well the wind turned the other way, and a nasty front in on the way, bringing 30s and 40s with it for my week off. penguin


I don't share the penguin's enthusiasm. razz


No fireplace in the new house either. smirk


No worries. I have a warm cuddley puppy dog to sleep with. puppy


She's worthless as a furniture mover though. wink


Have a happy day everyone.



joe


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987673
11/08/14 10:28 PM
11/08/14 10:28 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,267
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,267
In the Naughty Corner
Joe, that's great you will have a week off to move. How do you think Pepper will do? Did you find the cat so you can give it to your sister?
Peter and his SO move into their new place next Saturday too. yay

Have a great day all!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987683
11/09/14 02:37 AM
11/09/14 02:37 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Sorry you have to move in the cold, Joe. Hope it warms up for you soon.

Congratulations to Peter and his SO, Ana! rah Hope you have a great Sunday.

It's late Saturday night for me. I fell asleep before I actually finished getting ready for bed, so I figured I may as well post while I was up. grin

No exciting plans yet today. I got to doing other things, so maybe it will be take two for getting to chapter three of The Book of Unwritten Tales 2. grin

As for now, I'm headed back to sleep. Have a terrific Sunday, everyone. fall


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987685
11/09/14 03:42 AM
11/09/14 03:42 AM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Haroula Offline
Adept Boomer
Haroula  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Have a relaxing Sunday, everyone. smile wave


I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".

Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987690
11/09/14 04:57 AM
11/09/14 04:57 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,108
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,108
Marlborough USA
fall Good Morning Joe, Ana, venus and Haroula. Joe hope the move goes well. Ana hope Peter's move goes well too. Venus happy dreams. Haroula enjoy your day. Coffee is ready. Happy Day All fall


Gerry
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987701
11/09/14 07:32 AM
11/09/14 07:32 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers lab

Joe, Hope the move runs smoothly.

Ana, wishing you a wonderful Sunday!

Venus, sleep well. See you in the morning.

Haroula, good afternoon. Enjoy the day!

Gerry, coffee please and thank you.

Church this morning. Daughter visiting this afternoon. A good day wished to All! turkey


Gail
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987702
11/09/14 07:33 AM
11/09/14 07:33 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,019
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,019
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. No roof work today as it's raining. We will find out how the dry in went. Breakfast out and a trip to Sam's today. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Sunday. Danish, Eggs, Bacon, Sausage, Ham, Hash Browns, Toast, and BB Pancakes in the NC. penguin


Connie
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987707
11/09/14 09:13 AM
11/09/14 09:13 AM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Enjoy your Sunday everyone. thumbsup


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987711
11/09/14 10:04 AM
11/09/14 10:04 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 29,022
Unionville
manxman Offline
Sonic Boomer
manxman  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 29,022
Unionville
Good morning boomers. Hope everyone has a super Sunday smile


Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987714
11/09/14 10:27 AM
11/09/14 10:27 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,267
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,267
In the Naughty Corner
Good morning manxman, spaceQ, connie, Gail, Gerry, Haroula, venus wave

I was going to run the dogs again, but Merlin isn't up for it. I will have to find something for me to do. duh

Have an awesome Sunday!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #987721
11/09/14 11:21 AM
11/09/14 11:21 AM
Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 10,450
Southern California
Darlene Offline
Adept Boomer
Darlene  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 10,450
Southern California
wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Have a happy Sip & Surf Sunday!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Volunteering at church this morning, then an easy peasy day at home! happydance

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!


Woohoo and booyah! smile Have an easy peasy day!
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987722
11/09/14 11:22 AM
11/09/14 11:22 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Super Sunday ya'll puppy

Hubby on the plane on the way to Charlotte. Will pick him up later this afternoon. I'm up watching "Sunday Morning" and trying to stay up. Need more coffee! puppy


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987726
11/09/14 11:53 AM
11/09/14 11:53 AM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer
auntiegram  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
Aw Joe sorry a cool front is moving in for you moving but got to be better then 90-100's for moving. Hope all goes well. Thanks for the chuckles and have a lovely day!

Ana good luck to peter on a good move and may the weather be good. Sorry Merlin isn't up to par for a walk/run, but knowing you I am sure you will find something to do! lol Have a lovely day!

lol venus! I do that sometimes too. Happy gaming and have a lovely day!

Haroula have a lovely day!

Gerry thank you for that HOT coffee. Needed it this morning. Light snow on the ground and was a balmy 25F. lol Have a lovely day!

Gail enjoy church and have a nice visit with your daughter this afternoon. Have a lovely day!

Connie hope it is all good news and the rain stays out. Enjoy breakfast out and happy shopping. Thanks for the danish and have a lovely day!

Space enjoy what is left of the weekend and have a lovely day!

Manxman have a lovely day!

Darlene have a fun time volunteering at church and a lovely day!

L4l sending the Band for hubby and a safe travels!! Have a lovely day!

wave
Nan

Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987730
11/09/14 12:29 PM
11/09/14 12:29 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,267
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,267
In the Naughty Corner
Darlene, enjoy your easy peasy day!

L4L, yay on your KISA coming home.

Nan, the weather is going to be in the highs of 30's this week. Low to go in the teens. Too early!
I'm going to a wildlife preserve and rehab with my sister this afternoon. She wasn't jumping up and down for joy about walking outdoors but she agreed. lol

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987738
11/09/14 01:08 PM
11/09/14 01:08 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Wow Nan! 25 degrees??? I complain if our temps go below 70. rotfl


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987764
11/09/14 06:10 PM
11/09/14 06:10 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Well, fun afternoon! My neighbor decided to burn his yard which filled my house completely with smoke. Smells like we were having a campfire inside. Had to grab the dogs and leave as I couldn't breathe.

Turned the a.c. down low and stayed gone for a couple of hours. Walked the doggies at the park, and then picked up the spousal unit at the airport. Home again, and a bit tired. Thinking about hitting the bed to watch movies with the hubby.

Boys will be here soon. wave


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Sip & Surf Sunday [Re: gymcandy1] #987790
11/09/14 10:47 PM
11/09/14 10:47 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Well, I'm off to sleep. Early work day, as usual. smile Good night, everyone. sleep


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
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