Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit.
e e cummings (1894 - 1962)
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This little fella joins the lazaratian Monks order and takes a vow of silence. However, he's promised by the head Monk that he can speak two words per year.
After the first year the head Monk asks him his two words for the year.
He replies ... "More Blankets"
After his second year the head Monk asks him again his two words for the year.
He replies ... "More Food"
After the third year the head Monk asks him his two words for the year.
He replies ... "I'm Leaving"
The Head Monk says ... "Thank God...you've done nothing but moan since you got here!"
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Two cannibals in the jungle are standing over a fire with a large boiling pot, stirring the soup with wooden spoons. One cannibal says to the other, "I hate my mother in law, I really don't like her at all, she really makes me sick". The other cannibal says "So just eat the noodles".
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A police officer pulls over this guy who's been weaving in and out of the lanes.
He goes up to the guy's window and says, "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."
The man says, "Sorry, officer, I can't do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that, I'll have a really bad asthma attack."
"Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample."
"I can't do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I'll bleed to death."
"Well, then, we need a urine sample."
"I'm sorry, officer, I can't do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that, I'll get really low blood sugar."
"All right, then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."
"I can't do that, officer."
"Why not?"
"Because I'm drunk."
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A man told the ringmaster that he was interested in joining the circus as a lion tamer. The ringmaster asked if he had any experience and the man said, "Why, yes. My father was one of the most famous lion tamers in the world, and he taught me everything he knew."
"Really?" said the ringmaster. "Did he teach you how to make a lion jump through a flaming hoop?"
"Yes he did," the man replied.
"And did he teach you how to have six lions form a pyramid?"
"Yes he did," the man replied.
"And have you ever stuck your head in a lion's mouth?"
"Just once," the man replied.
The ringmaster asked, "Why only once?"
And the man said, "I was looking for my father."
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A man had just been laid off from work. He was standing on the railing of a high bridge getting read to jump off, when he happened to look down and see a little man with no arms dancing all around on the river bank below.
He thought to himself, "Life isn't so bad after all," and got off the railing.
He then walked down to the river bank to thank the little man for saving his life.
"Thank you," he said. "I was going to jump off that bridge and kill myself, but when I saw you dancing even though you have no arms, I changed my mind."
"Dancing? I'm not dancing!" the armless man replied bitterly...
"My butt itches, and I can't scratch it!"
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Colonel Sanders walks up to the Pope one day and says, I'll give you $5,000 if you change the words in the bible 'Give us this day our daily bread' to 'give us this day our daily chicken'".
The Pope replys, "Sorry, I cannot change the words of the Bible". Sanders says, "How about $7,000?". "Sorry, I cannot", The Pope replys. "$8,000"?, Sanders tries again. The Pope thinks about it and says, "Well, alright".
Later he goes to the cardinals and says, "I have good news and bad news. The good is we're $8,000 richer. The bad is that we lost our endorsement with Wonder Bread."
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I wonder what they were thinking when they named Wonder Bread. (?)
Good morning everyboomie.
I am back at work at 6am today, so I'd better get my behind to bed quick
.........last night.
This will be the first day I leave Baby at the new house. I would say home alone, but she has Pepper to keep her company.
Somehow though I don't think she'll see Pepper as good company.
I've had worse.
My brain is in shut down mode. I 'installed' a new router yesterday and every nerve in my brain has now been re-routed.
It didn't help that I spent well over an hour with a native Indian tech, and I don't mean a Native American Indian.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
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Hope you have a good day at work tomorrow.
Still a fairly early day, though, so I need to get to sleep soon. 
I will be leaving for Burbank California with Robert on Monday. We will only be there for 5 days, but I've never been there before. Robert has friends he visits there every year for Thanksgiving. To all here and all that follow, have a Wonderful Hump day. Danish, Omelets, French Toast, and Hot Chocolate in the NC. 
Have an awesome day!
