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Hump Day #993560
12/16/14 07:57 PM
12/16/14 07:57 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
Thou shouldst eat to live; not live to eat.
Socrates (469 BC - 399 BC)


Yes and I hold the same philosophy about work. thumbsup12
~~~~~~~~~

A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went.

The wife, after sleeping soundly for one hour, awakened without pain. As it was still early, she decided to go to the party. Since her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun watching him to see how he acted when she was not with him.

She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice woman he could, copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife sidled up to him. As a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new stuff that had just arrived.

She let him go as far as he wished; naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had sex. Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away, went home, put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior.

She was sitting up reading when he came in and she asked how the party was. He said, "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there."

Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"

He replied, "I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But I'll tell you... the guy I loaned my costume to sure had a really good time!"
~~~~~~~~~~

A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage, he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?"

She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "NO! I won't sleep with you tonight!" Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table.

After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology, and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations."

To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "What do you mean $200?!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~

A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting alone at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and ask if he can join her.

She smiles at him an says, "You're a very nice looking man, but I have my mind set on waiting for my one true dream guy to come along."

The guy says, "That's admirable of you, but surely you must get discouraged at the wait."

"Yeah" she says, "Your right. It does get discouraging at times, but I can handle it ok. My husband, on the other hand, hates it."
~~~~~~~~~

There's an English man, Irish man and a Scotsman. They're being chased by a policeman. They see this old warehouse so they run in. Inside there are 3 empty sacks on the floor. They each jump in a sack. In comes the copper and see's these three bundles on the floor. Goes up to the first one and kicks it. The English man shout out, "Woof Woof", and the copper thinking it's just an old dog leaves it and kicks the second sack. The Scotsman yells out, "Me-ow me-ow", he leaves this one as well thinking its just an old cat. He walks over to the last sack and kicks it, and the Irish man yells out.. "Potatoes Potatoes..!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~


Three engineers and three accountants are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three accountants each buy tickets and watch as the three engineers buy only a single ticket.

"How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asks an accountant. "Watch and you'll see," answers an engineer. They all board the train. The accountants take their respective seats but all three engineers cram into a restroom and close the door behind them.

Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the restroom door and says, "Ticket, please." The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.

The accountants saw this and agreed it was quite a clever idea. So after the conference, the accountants decide to copy the engineers on the return trip and save some money (being clever with money, and all). When they get to the station they buy a single ticket for the return trip.

To their astonishment, the engineers don't buy a ticket at all. "How are you going to travel without a ticket?" asked one perplexed accountant.

"Watch and you'll see," answered an engineer. When they board the train the three accountants cram into a restroom and the three engineers cram into another one nearby. The train departs.

Shortly afterward, one of the engineers leaves his restroom and walks over to the restroom where the accountants are hiding. He knocks on the door and says, "Ticket, please."
~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


I'm already out of time tonight. Gotta get up at 3:30. rolleyes


I had a great day off. Even took Baby to the creek. I also installed a new operating system on my desk top computer, because I've been having problems doing what I want on the XP system. I could not get any programs to down;load and install........like an anti-virus program. razz12


S'all good now though. thumbsup12


Feels like a brand new computer now, and I love that feeling. yay12


Gotta get my loose, wrinkled-up carcass to bed now though, so have a happy day everyone. santadance



joe


Last edited by gymcandy1; 12/16/14 07:59 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993563
12/16/14 08:45 PM
12/16/14 08:45 PM
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,145
Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
cailyn Offline
BAAG Specialist
cailyn  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,145
Somewhere ? in Massachusetts?
Hi Joe,I hope you have a good night sleeping sleep12 I'm off to bed myself,but before I go I'll get the coffee going! Wishing everyone a great Hump day! tree santa


I may not have gone where I intended to go,but I think I have ended up where I need to be.

Sue
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993569
12/16/14 09:50 PM
12/16/14 09:50 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Congrats on fixing your computer up Joe! :yay: Glad that Baby and you had a run.

Hi Sue wave12

Have a happy day all!

Ana wave12



Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993574
12/16/14 10:02 PM
12/16/14 10:02 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Congratulations on your computer success, Joe. happydance12

Have a terrific day, Cailyn.

Ana, hope you had a great birthday dinner! presents12 Sorry to hear about Peter and his girlfriend's food poisoning. eek12 Hope they feel better soon!

It's Tuesday night for me. Not such a good day at work today, but hopefully tomorrow should be calmer. I'm off to sleep for yet another early day. wave12

Have a great Wednesday, everyone. tree


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993610
12/17/14 02:27 AM
12/17/14 02:27 AM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Haroula Offline
Adept Boomer
Haroula  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Good morning,have a happy day all. happydance12 presents12


I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".

Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993613
12/17/14 05:36 AM
12/17/14 05:36 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Sue, Ana, venus and Haroula. Joe good for you! Sue thanks for the coffee. Ana hope Peter is feeling better.

Venus have a better day. Haroula enjoy! Wishing a peaceful day to All! tree


Gerry
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993624
12/17/14 07:51 AM
12/17/14 07:51 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone. Ana, I hope Peter and his girlfriend are feeling better today. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Hump day. Danish, Waffles, and Bacon Sandwiches in the NC. tree reindeer


Connie
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993641
12/17/14 09:20 AM
12/17/14 09:20 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers: reindeer

Joe, glad your computer is fixed.

Ana, hope you slept well.

Haroula, happy day wishes.

Venus, hope your work is better today.

Sue, thanks for the coffee.

Gerry, have a good day!

Connie, enjoy whatever plans you have for the day.

Going to a ladies' luncheon and Christmas party this afternoon. presents12


Gail
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993648
12/17/14 09:35 AM
12/17/14 09:35 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 29,025
Unionville
manxman Online content
Sonic Boomer
manxman  Online Content
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 29,025
Unionville
Good morning boomers. Hope everyone has a wonderful Wednesday wave12


Sometimes lost is where you need to be. Just because you don't know your direction doesn't mean you don't have one.
Re: Hump Day [Re: manxman] #993661
12/17/14 10:54 AM
12/17/14 10:54 AM
Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 10,450
Southern California
Darlene Offline
Adept Boomer
Darlene  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 10,450
Southern California
wave12 Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Glad to hear your day off yesterday was a good one! Hope your Hump Day is great!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!


Woohoo and booyah! smile Have an easy peasy day!
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993677
12/17/14 12:18 PM
12/17/14 12:18 PM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer
auntiegram  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,625
northern Wisconsin
Joe glad the computer is work great now! May work fly and go well. Thanks for the chuckles and have a lovely day!

Sue thanks for starting the coffee! Have a lovely day!

Ana prayers Peter and SO are feeling better today! Prayers that Merlin is doing well and you also! Have a lovely day!

venus sorry work was not so well but prayers that it goes well today! Have a lovely day!

Haroula have a lovely day!

Gerry have a nice walk and a lovely day!

Connie have fun whatever your plans are for the day! Thanks for the danish and have a lovely day!

Gail have fun at the luncheon and Christmas Party!! Have a lovely day!

Manxman have a lovely day!

Darlene may work go smoothly and you have a lovely day!

wave12
Nan

Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993695
12/17/14 01:18 PM
12/17/14 01:18 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
THank you all for the good wishes for Peter and his SO. THey are both feeling much better now. Merlin is also doing very well. Today is day two of no new bleeding, best birthday present ever! hearts

I have a major corner day today and then a day off tomorrow! happydance12

Have a fantastic day!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993697
12/17/14 01:26 PM
12/17/14 01:26 PM
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,402
Lexington, Texas
Yankee Clipper Offline
Addicted Boomer
Yankee Clipper  Offline
Addicted Boomer

Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,402
Lexington, Texas
Kinda cold and very overcast day, real Texas winter day. Haircut tomorrow.

Going to make a big salad, my menu for the day. HEB had some frozen vegan chicken strips and they are really good. You just saute them for 5-6 minutes and enjoy. I'll use those in my salad -yum. The brand is Gardein.

The 2 short haired cats are out -brrrrrr- and the 2 long haired ones are curled up and warm inside. Go figure.

Everybody, you and yours -get well and the pets too.


I wish I were a cat and belonged to me ~ My Aunt Helen Mary Rose
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993710
12/17/14 02:34 PM
12/17/14 02:34 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Wonderful Wednesday ya'll puppy

Been up for a bit, but been busy and just made it to the 'puter. Much has been accomplished and now I'm going to sit for a bit and sip some tea.

Ana, that is good news! reindeer


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Hump Day [Re: looney4labs] #993733
12/17/14 05:50 PM
12/17/14 05:50 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good afternoon Boomers. wave12


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #993744
12/17/14 07:53 PM
12/17/14 07:53 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Afternoon, Space wave12

edit: Off to bed. Sweet dreams all sleep12

Last edited by looney4labs; 12/17/14 11:28 PM.

"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
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