It’s not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.
~Marilyn Monroe~
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I’m on a strict seafood diet. Every time I see food, I eat it.
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I’m aware that the voices in my head aren’t real. But their ideas are just awesome sometimes!
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Somebody said today that I'm lazy. I nearly answered him.
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I’m not lazy. I’m just naturally a very relaxed person.
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I’m not saying I’m Batman, but so far nobody has seen me and Batman together in the same room.
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I’m standing outside. In other words, I’m outstanding.
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My mood is currently swinging between an axe and gasoline.
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A housewife's battle:
The household stares at me. I stare right back. Without breaking eye contact, I slide a piece of chocolate in my mouth. I won!
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Stressed is just desserts spelled backwards.
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He who wakes up early, yawns all day long.
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I’m all for irony, but the phrase “Good morning” seems to be going a bit too far.
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I wouldn’t exactly say I’m lazy but it’s a good thing that breathing is a reflex.
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You can only be young once. But you can enjoy being infantile forever.
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Married women face a significantly lower risk of kidnapping, nobody can be certain that the ransom would actually be paid.
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No thanks, I didn't fight my way to the top of the food pyramid to become a vegetarian.
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I am in touch with my motivation. I saw it going by this morning, waving at me and winking.
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I weighed myself today. It is clear I am too small for my weight.
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Good morning everyboomie.
Your weekend has arrived.
Time to come alive.
I mean, if you weren't already alive.
I'm certainly alive. I'm just sorta semi-conscious all week.
It conserves energy.
I'm on a fixed energy income.
Waste not, want not....right?
I will spill no energy before it's time.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe