Re: TGIF's

Posted by: gymcandy1

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 01:01 AM

Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.
H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)

Hey, did you hear about the...

Paper company that folded?

Brake company on the skids?

Bra manufacturers that went bust?

Surgeon who was forced to take a cut in his salary?

Cigarette company that went up in smoke?

Baker who was short of dough?

Refrigerator manufacturer that had it's assets frozen?

Corset firm that felt the squeeze?

Upholsterers that couldn't cover their costs?

Adhesive tape company that got into a sticky situation?

Tennis ball manufacturer that ended up in court?

Downfall of the bungee suppliers?

The train company that went off the rails?

The ship building company that sunk?

The dental practice that was rotten to it's roots?

Help Line Loser

"Word Perfect Technical Desk, may I help you?"

"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with Word Perfect."

"What sort of trouble?"

"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

"Went away?"

"They disappeared."

"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"



"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

"Are you still in Word Perfect, or did you get out?"

"How do I tell?"

"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"

"What's a sea-prompt?"

"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"

"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type!"

"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

"What's a monitor?"

"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.

"Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

"I don't know."

"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."

".......Yes, it is."

"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"


"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."

"Okay, here it is."

"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."

"I can't reach."

"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"


"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's because it's dark."


"Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

"Well, turn on the office light then."

"I can't."

"No? Why not?"

"Because there's a power outage."

"A power... A power outage? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"

"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

"Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

"Really? Is it that bad?"

"Yes, I'm afraid it is."

"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."

Good morning everyboomie. wave

A new day is upon us........again, and I would like to know who is responsible. rolleyes

Boy they just don't stop coming do they? razz

I guess if they did stop coming we wouldn't like it much, but then again we probably wouldn't be aware of it would we? grin

Personally I can't wait to do another closing shift. woot

My dear old Mother would wash my mouth out with soap if she heard my lying like that. slapforehead

It's a very good thing she's almost deaf. snicker know it's not a good thing to fall asleep with your hand on your keyboard.

It took me a while just to delete all those dashes. slapforehead

Have a happy day everyone.

Posted by: Haroula

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 03:25 AM

Good morning boomers wave
Have all a nice day happydance
Posted by: cailyn

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 03:47 AM

Good morning Joe,Haroula wave We got more snow last night eeknot much but enough to keep Spring away springCoffee is ready enjoy the day all puppy
Posted by: Cathy1

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 04:19 AM

Thank you for this Joe.
Posted by: Kaki's Sister

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 05:36 AM

bunny Good Morning Joe, Haroula, Cailyn and Cathy1. Wishing you all a peaceful Friday! bunny
Posted by: venus

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 06:06 AM

Hello and goodbye. wave
Posted by: Kaki's Sister

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 06:16 AM

Hi venus. dance Off and running again? Enjoy your day! dance
Posted by: GBC

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 06:43 AM

Good Morning Boomers

Joe, funny!

Haroula, have a great day.

Cailyn Spring has not srung here.

Cathy, good morning.

Gerry, good day wished for you.

Venus, hello.

Ana, are you out of the corner today?

Off for another treatment. Only 12 left after today. Wishing everyone a wonderful Friday. bunny
Posted by: connie

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 07:31 AM

Good morning everyone. Gail, good luck with the treatment. Prayers it's easy with no side effects, Hugs too. hearts Not sure what the day will bring yet. To all here and all who follow, have a Super TGIF. Danish, Omelets, and Hot Chocolate in the NC. chocobunny
Posted by: manxman

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 07:31 AM

Thanks for the smiles Joe smile Happy Friday Boomers wave
Posted by: gymcandy1

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 10:25 AM

Good morning everybody. wave

We have a dark rainy morning going on. I'd be excited if we got about 10" of rain, but I think we're only going to be allowed less than an inch on this visit of the Rainman. thumbsdown

I'll have more than that passing through me after I finish my third cup of coffee. snicker

Would anyone like a refill? Oops!! That didn't sound right. Sorry!! slapforehead

I hope everyone has a fantastic day. rah

Posted by: BrownEyedTigre

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 10:51 AM

Good morning boomies! I shut off my alarm and my backup alarm this morning. I decided to get a full 8 hours. yay

I will be running the dogs sometime today, they need it as much as I do. The rest of the day will be working.

Joe, how is mom feeling? I hope your evening goes fast!

Haroula, any fun weekend plans?

Sue, we keep getting a dusting of snow daily. I think since winter was so late, we are just shifting seasons. lol

Cathy, have a nice day.

Gerry, have a great day!

Venus, are you feeling better?

Gail, I hope your treatment goes well. Are these hard to tolerate or are you feeling okay? Big Hugs!
I am not out of the corner but I was given an extra couple days last night so I don't have to work around the clock. yay

Connie, is it warm by you yet? Can I come visit? I want to walk without being bundled up.

manxman, have a great day.
Posted by: auntiegram

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 11:18 AM

Joe thanks for the chuckles and I hope your closing shift goes by fast for ya!!

Haroula have a lovely day!

Cailyn sorry Old Man Winter just won't let go. No dusting here but then we have more then enough kon the ground we don't need any more. lol Have a lovely day!

Gerry have a nice walk and a lovely day!

venus I hope you are feeling better and that work goes well.

Gail how often do you have the treatments?? Good luck today. HUGS! hearts

Connie have fun with what ever pops up today!! Thanks for the danish!

Manxman have a lovely day!

Ana have a lovely time out with the dogs. Glad you were able to do a little sleep catchup!!! May the project move right along!!

No plans till taxi time then work the fish fry!

Posted by: BrownEyedTigre

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 11:42 AM

Nan, have fun at the fish fry! hearts
Posted by: Sorta Blonde

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 11:56 AM

And yet another perfect weather day here. Off to get rubber gloves to pick up the 'remains' of a bird that one of the ferals left for me on my deck. How nice of them. Yukky!

Finally figured out why my hand was swollen. Was doing something yesterday and managed to pull a muscle just at the thumb/wrist joint and then remembered doing that (but worse) a day before the swelling. Aha! Swelling is going down, thumb area hurts but at least I know what it is. Also managed to pull a back him muscle this morning bending over to pick up a dropped Kleenex. So dumb. Now I have to find the ice pack and take some pain stuff so I can function until it decides to ease up. How easy it is to hurt yourself! Gonna wrap myself in bubble wrap and bounce around with no more ouchies.
Posted by: looney4labs

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 12:08 PM

Fantastic Friday ya'll wave

We are having a spitty rain day. Good day to stay inside. Son headed out to work as I got up. I am junky junky junky and sound like the walking dead but don't feel as bad as I sound as long as I'm sitting still. Now that's a run on sentence. rotfl

Gail, hugs to you!

Posted by: my10rugrats

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 12:45 PM

anyone want a snow storm? we got one coming in this weekend and its suppose to be kind of nasty.i know i sure don't want it. will be having my 15yr granddaughter tonight(one thats been so sick) worried about having since we got this pending storm moving in tonight and tomorrow. but i don't want to disappoint her since its been a long time she has been over. sun is trying to peak out from some clouds . hope everyone has a great day and even better weekend
Posted by: GBC

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 03:18 PM

Thanks for all the hugs. I have to go everyday except Sat and Sun for treatments. I have no trouble tolerating them. Chemo was horrible but I don't mind the Radiation treatments at all.

Wishing everyone a wonderful day!
Posted by: auntiegram

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 03:28 PM

Gail only a couple weeks then and you will be finished. happydance That's what my friend here said too. lol

My10.......NO Thanks!!! Have plenty of it on the ground here already!! lol Hope they are wrong and granddaughter comes and has a wonderful time!!

L4l I think you need to have them come and sterilize your house!! lol Prayers that it all goes away soonest!! HUGS!

Sorta glad you remembered what happened to the hand!!

Ana thanks!! Hope you had a fun run with the dogs and the project is going well!

Time to get ready so I can head out. Have a wonderful rest of the day everybody!!!

Posted by: Space Quest Fan

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 03:37 PM

Hi everybody. wave

Enjoy your weekend. thumbsup
Posted by: Sorta Blonde

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 06:43 PM

L4L, that was a perfectly good sentence. It was long but totally understandable. I once wrote an entire short story in ONE sentence. I was fun to do, just not fun to read out loud since breathing wasn't an option. whistle
Posted by: soot

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 07:18 PM

Hello everyone. I survived another work week, and on second thought is was rather short given my shaky start to the week last Sunday .. oh my but don't want to repeat that any time in the near or distant future.

The weekend has arrived and I am looking forward to it and time with WOM!!

Be right back...need to do some gardening

Posted by: BrownEyedTigre

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 09:40 PM

Sorta, I hope your hand feels better quick.

soot, I am glad you survived the week. Enjoy your weekend.

SpaceQ, any special plans? Are you rooting for Ohio State?

Nan, I made fish tonight also. I bet your fried one is better though. lol Have fun!

Gail, I am glad you are doing well.

My10, they are still undecided if it's coming our way or not. I guess we will see on Sunday.
Enjoy your time with grand daughter. hearts

L4L, I hope you can breathe easier now. Do you have bronchitis?
Posted by: auntiegram

Re: TGIF's - 03/22/13 10:38 PM

Well I am home but the others are still out. Guess they will call if they want a ride. duh

Space you have a lovely weekend.

Soot glad you have survived the week and may you enjoy the weekend!!

Ana can't say it is better but they do offer baked fish also!! All in all was a good night.

Time now to relax and get off my feet. lol

Posted by: BrownEyedTigre

Re: TGIF's - 03/23/13 12:54 AM

Sweet dreams all...I'm heading to bed.

Nan, hope you can keep your feet up and not have to go back out.

Ana wave