Posted by: gymcandy1

Sunday's - 06/08/13 11:39 PM

"Just when you think there's nothing to write about, Nixon says, 'I am not a crook.' Jimmy Carter says, 'I have lusted after women in my heart.' President Reagan says, 'I have just taken a urinalysis test, and I am not on dope.'" Art Buchwald

One day the Pope is coming to America in his Limo and he said to the driver, "Why don't you let me drive for ones."
The driver thinks to him self, "Well I can't say no to this guy, he's the pope." So the driver pulls over and they change places. The Pope was having fun, hauling butt down the freeway, dogging cars. After a while the driver taps on the window and tells the Pope, "slow down a bit, you might get pulled over."
The Pope says, "ahhh, don't worry about it, I'm the Pope." So he rolls up the window and continues to drive very fast. After a few moments he gets pulled over. The cop walks to the car and the Pope rolls down the tinted window. The cop sees the Pope and says, "oh, I, ehhh, sorry, can you hold on a minute."
The Pope says, "sure"
The cop walks back to his car and radios back to the station. He says, "guys I just pulled over some one really important."
They ask who, "The President?."
"No more important."
"The president of another country."
"No more important."
"An ambassador."
"No even more important."
"Well who is it."
"I don't know, but the Pope is their chauffeur."

A woman who was rather old-fashioned, delicate, and elegant - especially in her language - was planning a week's vacation in Florida so she wrote to a particular campground and asked for a reservation.

She wanted to make sure the campground was fully equipped, but didn't quite know how to ask about the toilet facilities. She just couldn't bring herself to write the word "TOILET" in her letter. After much deliberation, she finally came up with the old-fashioned term "BATHROOM COMMODE." But when she wrote that down, she still thought she was being too forward. So, she started all over again, rewrote the letter and referred to the bathroom commode merely as the B.C. "Does the campground have it's own B.C.?" is what she actually wrote.

Well, the campground owner wasn't old-fashioned at all and when he got the letter, he just couldn't figure out what the woman was talking about. That B.C. business really stumped him.

After worrying about it for a while, he showed the letter to several campers, but they couldn't imagine what the lady meant either. So the campground owner, finally coming to the conclusion that the lady must be asking about the location of the local Baptist Church, sat down and wrote the following reply:
"Dear Madam: Regret very much in the delay in answering you letter. I now take the pleasure in informing you that a B.C. is located nine miles north of the campground and is capable of seating 250 people atone time. I admit it is quite a distance away if you are in the habit of going regularly, but no doubt you will be pleased to know that a great number of people usually take their lunches along and make a day of it. They usually arrive early and stay late."

"The last time my wife and I went was six years ago and it was so crowded that we had to stand up the whole time we were there. It may interest you to know that right now, there is a supper being planned to raise money to buy more seats. They're going to hold it in the basement of the B.C."

"I would like to say it pains me very much not to be able to go more regularly but it is sure no lack of desire on my part. As we grow older, it seems to be more of an effort, particularly in cold weather."

"If you do decide to come down to our campground, perhaps I could go with you the first time you go, sit with you, and introduce you to all the other folks."

"Remember, this is a friendly community."
A state trooper pulled a car over and told the man driving that he was going 50 mph in a 40 mph zone. "I was only going 40!" the driver protested.
"Not according to my radar," the trooper said.
"Yes, I was!" the man shouted back.
"No you weren't!" the trooper said.

With that, the man's wife leaned toward the window and said, "Officer, I should warn you not to argue with my husband when he's been drinking."

A group of friends who went deer hunting separated into pairs for the day. That night, one hunter returned alone, staggering under a hugh buck. "Where's Harry?", asked another hunter.

"He fainted a couple miles up the trail," Harry's partner answered. "You left him lying there alone and carried the deer back?"

"It was a tough decision," said the hunter. "But I figured no one is going to steal Harry."

A man sat quietly reading his morning paper one Sunday morning. Suddenly,
he is knocked almost senseless by his wife, who stands behind him holding
a frying pan in hand.

Man: "What was that for?"

Wife: "Why do you have a piece of paper in your pocket with "Daisy"
written on it?"

Man: "Oh honey, don't you remember two weeks ago when I went to the horse
races? Daisy was the name of the horse I bet on."

The wife was satisfied, and appologized for bonking him.

Three days later he is again sitting reading the paper when once again he
is bonked on the head.

Man: "What's that for this time?"

Wife: "Your horse called."

Good morning everyboomie. wave

Welcome to the weekend part 2. smirk

I hope you enjoy all of the jokes thoroughly. happydance

I've tested them out personally while on tour doing my stand-up routine. thumbsup

I'm currently back at home working on my sit-down routine. yes

Soon, however, I'll be doing active research on my "lay-down" routine. tired

I'll publish my research results just as soon as I complete the study on my theory that the more I sleep, the more I want to sleep. razz

I get back at it as soon as I get a nap in. grin

Have a happy day. yay

Posted by: Darlene

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 01:35 AM

wave Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers! Love all your routines! Hope your Sunday is splenderferous!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Still Saturday evening for me....

Had a best bud phone chat this morning, then it's my weekend to volunteer at church.

Saw daughter, her sweetie, and their friends quickly this evening, as they were coming home from a sushi dinner. Now they're doing a movie at their home. smile

Sunday, it's dinner with son, DIL, and grandbabies. I think we'll barbecue... smile

Life is good! smile


To all abed, sleep To all awake, woot

Posted by: BrownEyedTigre

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 02:44 AM

Good morning boomies! We had a wonderful time line dancing at the country bar for Sam's bachelorette party and hubby had a great time at her fiance's bachelor party. I got daughter, niece and her best friend home safe and sound and now I'm ready for bed too. The icing on the cake was Hawk's win! woot

I will start the day with Insanity class and then I may just go back to bed. lol I'm exhausted.

Have a happy day Joe, Darlene and all!

Posted by: cailyn

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 02:59 AM

Good morning Joe,Ana,Darlene and all who follow wave Ana sounds like you had lot of fun when is the wedding? Darlene enjoy the barbecue with your family!Joe alway's love your jokes in the morning grin I haven't been here in a while sick again with Pneumonia sick Gerry thanks for keeping the going wave I'll get it on this morning and keep it hot!Have a peaceful day everyone puppy
Posted by: Kaki's Sister

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 04:56 AM

Good Morning Joe, Ana, Darlene and Sue. Joe thanks for the smiles! Ana sounds like you had a really fun evening. Darlene enjoy your day with family. Sue I'm sorry to hear you were so sick. I was about to send you a pm this morning. You take care and enjoy a quiet day. flowers Wishing everyone a Good Day! wave
Posted by: connie

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 06:48 AM

Good morning everyone. Sue and Midge, prayers your feeling much better. Dinner out with a friend of the boys and his parents, it's his Birthday. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Sunday. Danish, BB Pancakes, Waffles, and Bacon Sandwiches in the NC. spring
Posted by: soot

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 08:51 AM

Good morning all laugh

Joe .. your research sounds promising, keep up the hard work

Darlene .. sounds like quite a day for you, have fun

Ana, I like your thinking

Sue, it's good to see you .. get well soon .. we'll keep you in our prayers

Morning Gerry .. have a wonderful Sunday

Connie, drive safe and have fun at the birthday gathering

L4L and I had a fun time at the baseball game last night, they had a Star Wars theme .. the stadium staff did an outstanding job with the event .. son and kids went in costume .. in fact, son was asked to compete in a Chewbacca imitation contest .. and the crowd picked as the winner .. whoa, I was very impressed .. son and his boys met friends at the game last night and went home with them to let the kids play so it's very quiet at the moment .. we'll see if we get out to the park later today for a walk with the buddy boys as it's currently raining wink

Take care everyone and enjoy a Super Sunday!

Posted by: Space Quest Fan

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 09:01 AM

Have a great Sunday everyone. happydance
Posted by: manxman

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 10:11 AM

Good morning fellow boomers wave Hope everyone has a super relaxing Sunday smile
Posted by: BrownEyedTigre

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 11:12 AM

Darlene, enjoy your dinner with son and family. I bet the grandkids are getting big!

Sue, I am sorry you are not feeling well. Don't overdo it so it can get better quick. hearts

Gerry, what's on the agenda today?

Connie, enjoy your dinner.

soot, your evening sounds great. yay I hope it stops raining so you can get a walk in.

SpaceQ, have a happy day!

manxman, enjoy your Sunday.

Joe, any fun plans for today?

Feeling pretty good this morning considering we partied hearty last night. Looking through my camera photos this morning I see some fun and interesting pictures. rotfl

I'll be heading to Insanity class in a hour and then who knows what the day will bring.
Posted by: gymcandy1

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 11:38 AM

Hooray I'm back on line. woot

Good morning everybody. wave

I was without internet this morning. We had a torrential storm dump over 2 1/2 inches of rain on us last night. shocked

The thunder shook the house, and it had Baby jumping on and off the bed, and jumping on top of me to wake me up. She wanted to go to the living room to hide under the table. puppy

I called Dish this morning and set up an appointment for them to come fix my internet service for next Wednesday. I guess I need to call them back now. smile

I went out to survey the aftermath. The creek is flooding again. It'll be days before I can get back down to it.

Our ponds are still not full even after all the rain we've had in the last two weeks, but they are close to being full. If we get one more storm like that one last night they will be overflowing for sure.

I've already walked the high ground, so there will be no more head hunting for a while.

I need the break though. I'm wearing out. tired

I'll just take it easy the rest of today. I have to be at work at 5:00am tomorrow anyway. razz

I hope everyone has a super day. yes

Posted by: Sorta Blonde

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 12:07 PM

Oh dear! Floods and illness and all sorts of awful things for our GB crowd. Hope it all clears soon and everyone is back to normal (whatever that is).

Today I have a project. I have to move an old porcelain over cast iron 'drainboard' sink that I've been using outside for potting plants. Then I have to remove the 10 concrete blocks I had it sitting on. THEN I have to figure out why my kitchen sink is draining OUTside instead of going the correct way to the sewer.

For years, we have had the 'cleanout' cover off the kitchen wall outside. Seems the stucco guys messed up and couldn't get it back on after the job, so it wasn't a problem for years until I noticed in the last few weeks that soap from dishwashing was coming out from the cleanout. Hummmm.

So I stuffed a rag in it (no easy task with my arthritis and back problems since it's BEHIND the sink outside) and then ran some soapy water through. Well the sink REFUSED to drain, until it dislodged the rag. Bad news. This means the pipe is clogged and everything goes outside on the ground.

Hopefully my friend will help me with the heavy stuff and I can just run a pole into the pipe to break up whatever is clogging the outlet to the main sewer pipe.

Not looking forward to this one. Hopefully I can do it myself and won't need a plumber. Wish me luck. help
Posted by: looney4labs

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 12:09 PM

Super Sunday ya'll puppy

Hubby and I both slept rough last night. He gave up and got up around 6. I finally got to sleep around 3 so slept til 10. Just as I was getting my first cup of coffee, son and the boys came in.

Now son is sleeping as he closes tonight at work, boys are playing on the Fires, and hubby and I are sitting, sipping, and surfing.

I think we will try to keep the day very low key as I am tired and achy and I'm sure hubby is as well.

I do plan a little more laundry and I may look at stewing the books a little. Boys will be here until Wednesday so I need to get it done while hubby is home.

We had a very good time last night at the ball game. Not many folks were in costume, but some had on Star Wars t-shirts. We went early to see what was going on. As we walked to our seat, staff came out and picked son to participate on the field in a Chewbacca calling contest. Now, son really doesn't like being in front of crowds, so I was surprised when he said "yes." To his surprise, he won and his prize was a Yoda Soda...a Sprite with a Yoda Label on it.

Princess Leia threw out the first pitch and then was arrested on the pitcher's mound by Darth Vader and his guard. Various Star Wars characters wandered the park for the whole evening and you could get your picture made with them.

For each player announcement, there was a Star Wars pic...bad guys for the opponents and good guys for the home team. Of course, the music was from Star Wars and there was Star Wars trivia all night.

The boys had on capes and carried their light sabers and had Darth Vader masks though they didn't wear the masks much.

We did get rained on a bit, but only for about 1 inning, and best of all, we won! The game was followed by gorgeous fireworks. Lots of fun!

Hubby and I came home and fed the dogs and then fell into bed. Son and the boys went to a friends house so the kids could all run around and be crazy rotfl

Cailyn, take care of yourself so you can feel better soon.

Ana, did you remember all the photos?
Posted by: Lotus777

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 03:19 PM

Hi Boomers!! Sounds like everyone is hanging in there at any rate and some of you are having just too much fun!! Hope you keep on getting better Sue!! Ana, will you post pix? Have a nice quiet day Joe, sounds like you need it! Hope you're enjoying your weekend SpaceQ. Sorta , you better have some help so you don't hurt your back. I hope you can get things unstuck. Sounds like you had a jolly good time last night L4L!! Trying to finish the garden planting today. The wind here has been awful and dries things to a bone making it very difficult to get seeds germinated, ugh. So I come in and game a bit and then out I go again, lol. Have a great rest of your weekend everyone and Happy Gaming!! wave
Posted by: GBC

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 04:01 PM

Hello Boomers.

Guess who forgot to post this morning?

Wishing everyone a wonderful rest of the day! spring
Posted by: looney4labs

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 05:08 PM

Son is off to work. Looked high and low for his work shoes. Turned out they were in the front closet. If you knew how rare that was, you'd rotfl laughing with me.

Mr Cullen woke up from his nap, but was obviously not ready to get up yet. So, he is in his bed until Sullen goes away and is replaced by Cullen.

The boys got some good progress made on their room today. I just wish their bookshelves had come in. Perrin is matching his socks from the laundry and I just taught him to fold the tops down to keep them together. Before that he had so much fun helping me make a smoothie for everyone. It's an all green smoothie and very tasty.

We (which means they under my supervision) got the stuffed toys, the books, and the puzzles all picked up and put away. All their summer clothes are sorted, fit them, folded, and put away. We'll go back into the fray tomorrow and deal with the little toys like cars, etc. You know, there really is a floor in there. happydance

We also made brownies. The boys had fun but it is such a bad thing for me. I love love love brownies.

Lotus, can you mulch where you planted to keep the ground moist? What are you planting?

Gail, how has your day been?
Posted by: auntiegram

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 05:37 PM

Well me thinks the day has gotten away from me. lol It has been down-pouring all day and son't look like it will let up any time soon either.

Joe the net is back and may you enjoy a relaxing day!

Ana so glad you had a wonderful time lastnight. Enjoy the corner free day!

Cailyn HUGS!! and Prayers.

Gerry, Space, manxman have a lovely day!

Connie birthday to son's friend. Have a fun time.

Darlene sounds like a lovely day, enjoy!

Sorta please be careful out there. Hope some tree branches haven't grown into the sewer.

Soot sounds like a lovely time at the game. Enjoy the relaxing day!

L4l sounds like those boys are growing up some and being helpful. happydance

Gail hope you are enjoying a nice relaxing day!

Lotus happy planting!!

Posted by: gymcandy1

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 06:54 PM

Me thinks the day has gotten away from me too Nan. Just as my weekend has gotten away from me. lol

I am NOT ready to go back to work for 6 days. cry

Back to counting the days down. smirk

I went to Walmart today and then came back and napped on the couch and watched The Hobbit with Baby. puppy

L4L that sounds like a very cool evening you guys had. thumbsup

I'll bet your G'kiddos really enjoy the time they spend with you and Soot. wink

Have a good evening Gale, Lotus, and everyboomie. yes

Posted by: Sorta Blonde

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 06:55 PM

I did it! Only hours and hours of planning and trying and bending and lifting and getting sewer sludge all over my feet. Ugh. Wore rubber gloves and probably used about 10 pair in the process.

Got my neighbor to help me lift the heavy drainboard sink off the blocks and move one set of blocks. Was heavier than I remember, but I took 2 pain pills after and maybe I'll live.

Took a good look at the 'cleanout' pipe end and realized it had rusted and crumbled over the years (1944 house original plumbing there). Took some 6 foot plant stakes (I'd used them in the sump pump to clear it) and added a 3rd one to the other two taped together. So I now had a 18 foot pole. Shoved it in the cleanout and immediately got sludge, water, gunk, leaves, etc. Might even be a lizard or two in there somewhere since the end has been open since 1998. Wasn't a problem until a month or so ago when I noticed soapy water coming out of the cleanout end near the Outdoorises water dish. THEN I knew it was the pipe, not their water causing the puddle there.

So I wiggled the long pole and hit some resistance and wiggled and pulled and shoved and more gunk came out. THEN I realized the pole was too short. This cleanout goes diagonal from the back of the house to the front corner so it's about 60 feet long.

Neighbor ran down to his house and got 2, 8 foot metal poles. I taped one of them to the plant stakes and now had 25 feet of pole. Jammed that in and again hit resistance. Worked on it for about 20 minutes. Then I kept having my neighbor turn on the water in the sink so I could see if it was clearing the other way. I could tell if it didn't back up and if the water didn't come out the end I was working on.

Finally got almost no water coming out my end and decided that we could block the cleanout. Looked for something pliable (like a huge cork) but found nothing in my stash of parts. Ran off to the Home Despot and nobody there could tell me where to find corks. Duh. Finally one guy took us to another guy who actually KNEW where they were. Hooray.

Unfortunately, the largest cork, was no bigger than a thermos cork and I needed one much larger. The guy suggested a 'pressure tester' contraption that plumbers use to see about leaks. It looked like it might work so I got that. Then I found..tada..a HUGE cane tip. Yup the old squishy white tips for canes and bought a 2 pack. I estimated that would be better for what I had looked at inside that crumbling pipe.

Soooo then I insisted we stop for FOOD. Hadn't eaten all day and it was 1 pm by now. Ugh. Had a nice Prime Rib Benedict at Carrows and then back home to play with my plugs.

Neighbor was smart. He just got out of the car and said 'see ya later' and off he went. I guess he had had enough of being the helper.

So I jammed the cane tip in the hole, hit it with a hammer and tried running water. It had a few serious water spouts. So, I looked for something squishier to wrap over the plug and came up with some bubble wrap. It WORKED. Wrapped it, jammed it in, hit it with the hammer, turned on the water and NO drips.

Then I ran drain cleaner down the sink, waited, flushed it with hot water for 10 minutes and I think, thinking hard, that I have it fixed. Yes! For now it's holding and water is draining just fine in the kitchen sink. Hope this is the fix and I don't have to do any more stuff anytime soon.

Then I went out and sprayed Lysol over everything I'd used (hammer, poles, scissors, and all over the ground). Now I wait for the water puddle to sink in which may take awhile since it's been dripping for so long out there. THEN fresh dirt on top and put the cat's water dish back and block the plug and it's bubble wrap with something so the raccoons don't 'pull the plug' on me.

Happy camper when I finally get something working. Quick fix for me all the time.

Keeping fingers crossed that this holds, I think it will. Hooray! dance
Posted by: looney4labs

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 07:21 PM

Wow Sorta, that is quite the adventure thumbsup

Joe, is anyone ever ready for the weekend to end? I know hubby isn't?

Nan, do you guys need the rain?
Posted by: Space Quest Fan

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 09:33 PM

Good night Boomers. wave
Posted by: Midge

Re: Sunday's - 06/09/13 10:11 PM

Good night SQFan and all.

Midgie sleep