Posted By: gymcandy1
Black Diner - 11/27/15 04:16 AM
Black Friday: Because only in America, people trample others for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have.
Unknown
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1. Who profits the most on Black Friday? The one who was smart enough not to go shopping on that day.
2. What do people eat on Black Friday? Whatever they couldn’t finish on Thanksgiving Thursday.
3. Why do they call the day after Thanksgiving ‘Black Friday’? It matches the mood of all those unhappy bloated shoppers.
4. Why did Obama’s family go shopping on Black Friday? What better way is there to spread some of that Stimulus Money?!
5. Why do shoppers feel like cranberry juice on Black Friday? They get bruised and battered bloody by other people until they get squeezed at the cashier.
6. What was the horse looking for on Black Friday? A Macintosh.
7. What do Black Friday shoppers and the Thanksgiving turkey have in common? They know what it’s like to be jammed into a small place and stuffed.
9. Probable Headline: “1000 Americans killed trying to get Twinkies on Black Friday.”
10. ‘Black Friday’ came earlier this year for me because my TV was stolen.
11. Black Friday is a scam. You should be mad they overcharge you 364 days a year.
A small business owner was dismayed when a brand new corporate chain much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST BLACK FRIDAY DEALS. He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST BLACK FRIDAY PRICES. The small business owner panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop-it read… MAIN ENTRANCE.
```````````````
This Black Friday malarkey doesn't seem very popular at work.
I'm the only one who's turned up with boot polish on their face.
``````````````````````````````
Black Friday: Because only in America, people trample others for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have.
Unknown
```````````````````````
1. Who profits the most on Black Friday? The one who was smart enough not to go shopping on that day.
2. What do people eat on Black Friday? Whatever they couldn’t finish on Thanksgiving Thursday.
3. Why do they call the day after Thanksgiving ‘Black Friday’? It matches the mood of all those unhappy bloated shoppers.
4. Why did Obama’s family go shopping on Black Friday? What better way is there to spread some of that Stimulus Money?!
5. Why do shoppers feel like cranberry juice on Black Friday? They get bruised and battered bloody by other people until they get squeezed at the cashier.
6. What was the horse looking for on Black Friday? A Macintosh.
7. What do Black Friday shoppers and the Thanksgiving turkey have in common? They know what it’s like to be jammed into a small place and stuffed.
9. Probable Headline: “1000 Americans killed trying to get Twinkies on Black Friday.”
10. ‘Black Friday’ came earlier this year for me because my TV was stolen.
11. Black Friday is a scam. You should be mad they overcharge you 364 days a year.
A small business owner was dismayed when a brand new corporate chain much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST BLACK FRIDAY DEALS. He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST BLACK FRIDAY PRICES. The small business owner panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop-it read… MAIN ENTRANCE.
```````````````
This Black Friday malarkey doesn't seem very popular at work.
I'm the only one who's turned up with boot polish on their face.
``````````````````````````````
Get ready folks, it's nearly time for Black Friday.
Or as it's known among American police, The Purge.
````````````````````
If someone advertises a Black Friday beer sale I will camp out until I freeze.
One day you're thankful for everything you have, then the next day you're fighting your friends and neighbors over more stuff to be thankful for.
You know what? I don't see color. I just see people. I will be calling it Friday.
I'll be celebrating Black Friday in my traditional way.... by completely ignoring it.
Black Friday = The Day People Spend Money They Don't Have On Things They Don't Need.
Black Friday = Broke Saturday I passed gas in the Apple Store on Black Friday and everyone got pissed at me. It's not my fault they don't have Windows.
Probable Headline: "1000 Americans killed trying to get twinkies on Black Friday."
"Black Friday" came earlier this year for me (my TV was stolen)
I want Black Friday prices and short lines everyday.
Why don't liquor stores have Black Friday sales?
It's Black Friday and mall is packed with shoppers and Steve can't find his wife. Steve goes up to a very attractive woman and says 'Excuse me, can you help me? I cannot see my wife, and I know that she is here in the shopping mall somewhere. Can you just talk to me for a couple of minutes?" The attractive woman replies "Why?" Steve replies "Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman, my wife materializes out of thin air."
`````````````````````````````
Two Cappa sorority sisters were shopping on Black Friday and run into each other. When they started to discuss their home lives, one said, "Seems like all Mike and I do anymore is fight. I've been so upset I've lost 20 pounds." "Why don't you just leave him then?" asked her sorority sister. "Oh! Not yet." the first replied, "I'd like to lose at least another fifteen pounds first."
````````````````````````````
Good morning everyboomie.
Welcome to the morning after!
It sure looks black outside to me.
Rainy too. We have very heavy rain moving in, so I'm going to post this while I still can.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
Unknown
```````````````````````
1. Who profits the most on Black Friday? The one who was smart enough not to go shopping on that day.
2. What do people eat on Black Friday? Whatever they couldn’t finish on Thanksgiving Thursday.
3. Why do they call the day after Thanksgiving ‘Black Friday’? It matches the mood of all those unhappy bloated shoppers.
4. Why did Obama’s family go shopping on Black Friday? What better way is there to spread some of that Stimulus Money?!
5. Why do shoppers feel like cranberry juice on Black Friday? They get bruised and battered bloody by other people until they get squeezed at the cashier.
6. What was the horse looking for on Black Friday? A Macintosh.
7. What do Black Friday shoppers and the Thanksgiving turkey have in common? They know what it’s like to be jammed into a small place and stuffed.
9. Probable Headline: “1000 Americans killed trying to get Twinkies on Black Friday.”
10. ‘Black Friday’ came earlier this year for me because my TV was stolen.
11. Black Friday is a scam. You should be mad they overcharge you 364 days a year.
A small business owner was dismayed when a brand new corporate chain much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST BLACK FRIDAY DEALS. He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST BLACK FRIDAY PRICES. The small business owner panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop-it read… MAIN ENTRANCE.
```````````````
This Black Friday malarkey doesn't seem very popular at work.
I'm the only one who's turned up with boot polish on their face.
``````````````````````````````
Black Friday: Because only in America, people trample others for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have.
Unknown
```````````````````````
1. Who profits the most on Black Friday? The one who was smart enough not to go shopping on that day.
2. What do people eat on Black Friday? Whatever they couldn’t finish on Thanksgiving Thursday.
3. Why do they call the day after Thanksgiving ‘Black Friday’? It matches the mood of all those unhappy bloated shoppers.
4. Why did Obama’s family go shopping on Black Friday? What better way is there to spread some of that Stimulus Money?!
5. Why do shoppers feel like cranberry juice on Black Friday? They get bruised and battered bloody by other people until they get squeezed at the cashier.
6. What was the horse looking for on Black Friday? A Macintosh.
7. What do Black Friday shoppers and the Thanksgiving turkey have in common? They know what it’s like to be jammed into a small place and stuffed.
9. Probable Headline: “1000 Americans killed trying to get Twinkies on Black Friday.”
10. ‘Black Friday’ came earlier this year for me because my TV was stolen.
11. Black Friday is a scam. You should be mad they overcharge you 364 days a year.
A small business owner was dismayed when a brand new corporate chain much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST BLACK FRIDAY DEALS. He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST BLACK FRIDAY PRICES. The small business owner panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop-it read… MAIN ENTRANCE.
```````````````
This Black Friday malarkey doesn't seem very popular at work.
I'm the only one who's turned up with boot polish on their face.
``````````````````````````````
Get ready folks, it's nearly time for Black Friday.
Or as it's known among American police, The Purge.
````````````````````
If someone advertises a Black Friday beer sale I will camp out until I freeze.
One day you're thankful for everything you have, then the next day you're fighting your friends and neighbors over more stuff to be thankful for.
You know what? I don't see color. I just see people. I will be calling it Friday.
I'll be celebrating Black Friday in my traditional way.... by completely ignoring it.
Black Friday = The Day People Spend Money They Don't Have On Things They Don't Need.
Black Friday = Broke Saturday I passed gas in the Apple Store on Black Friday and everyone got pissed at me. It's not my fault they don't have Windows.
Probable Headline: "1000 Americans killed trying to get twinkies on Black Friday."
"Black Friday" came earlier this year for me (my TV was stolen)
I want Black Friday prices and short lines everyday.
Why don't liquor stores have Black Friday sales?
It's Black Friday and mall is packed with shoppers and Steve can't find his wife. Steve goes up to a very attractive woman and says 'Excuse me, can you help me? I cannot see my wife, and I know that she is here in the shopping mall somewhere. Can you just talk to me for a couple of minutes?" The attractive woman replies "Why?" Steve replies "Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman, my wife materializes out of thin air."
`````````````````````````````
Two Cappa sorority sisters were shopping on Black Friday and run into each other. When they started to discuss their home lives, one said, "Seems like all Mike and I do anymore is fight. I've been so upset I've lost 20 pounds." "Why don't you just leave him then?" asked her sorority sister. "Oh! Not yet." the first replied, "I'd like to lose at least another fifteen pounds first."
````````````````````````````
Good morning everyboomie.
Welcome to the morning after!
It sure looks black outside to me.
Rainy too. We have very heavy rain moving in, so I'm going to post this while I still can.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
Good Morning Joe, SpaceQ, Ana and everyone. Joe hope you have a bright day! SpaceQ enjoy your day. Ana good luck shopping! Coffee and tea are ready. Wishing you all a stress free day! 
