Surf and Turf Saturday

I knew a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.

JOHNNY CARSON

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Neanderthal Test

Test Yourself : Are you a Neanderthal?

1. Do your eyebrows meet in the middle? +5

2. Can you lock your knees in an upright position? -5

3. Got a chin? If the answer is no, +3

4. How about a forehead? If not, +3

5. Is it easy for you to balance a book on your head? +5

6. Do you ever open beer bottles with your teeth? +10

7. Are you frequently more comfortable squatting on your heels than sitting in a chair? +5

8. Is your head attached vertically to your neck? If not, +1 for every five degrees of slope.

9. Less than five feet tall? +1 for every inch under.

10. If your lower arm is shorter than your upper arm,+1 for every inch of difference.

11. Ditto for your lower and upper legs.

12. Pigeon-toed? +5

13. Have you ever felt like bashing a postal clerk with a club? You're normal--no points.

14. Is the space between your big toe and your other toes big enough to hold an apple? +5

15. Do you regularly eat apples in this fashion? +15

16. Do people think you're wearing your hair in a bun when you're not? +10

17. Can you count your vertebrae while wearing two sweaters and an overcoat? +5

18. Is your nickname "Duke", "Butch", or "Animal"? +3



Scoring

0-20 points: You are a virtually pure homosapien. Feel free to build bridges, compose symphonies, and overrun the world.

20-40 points: A slight Neanderthal strain means that you will occasionally have spells of primitive behavior, crawling around on all fours and whooping wildly. If you live in California, no one will notice.

40-60 points: You can still function quite well in the modern world, but avoid eating in fancy restaurants lest your table manners give you away.

60-80 points: Your Pleistocene heritage is predominant. You should consider a career in pro football.

80-100 points: Unfortunately, your genetic makeup is Grunt City; there is no place for you in human society. A career in politics is recommended.

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Nerdy T-Shirts


<-------- The information went data way --------

11th Commandment - Covet not thy neighbor's system.

2 + 2 = 5 for Extremely Large values of 2.

�640K ought to be enough for anybody.� - Bill Gates, 1981

A computer's attention span is as long as it's Power Cord.

Access denied - nah nah na nah nah!

All computers wait at the same speed.

All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?

As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.

ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSII...

Backups? We don' NEED no steenking backups.

Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay...

Best file compression around: "DEL" = 100% COMPRESSION

BREAKFAST.COM Halted... Cereal Port Not Responding

BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd Down, 4th Quarter, 5 Yards to Go!

Buy a Pentium 586/200 so you can reboot faster.

C:\> Bad command or file name! Go stand In The corner.

C:\WINDOWS C:\WINDOWS\GO C:\PC\CRAWL

C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN RUN\DOS\RUN

Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.

COFFEE.EXE Missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key.

COMPUTER: A device designed to speed and automate errors.

COMPUTER UPGRADE: Take old bugs out... Put New Ones In.

Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C. (Y/N)?

Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.

Does fuzzy logic tickle?

E Pluribus Modem

E-mail returned to sender - insufficient voltage.

Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...

Error? Impossible! My Modem is Error Correcting.

Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to Continue.

Ethernet (n): Something used to catch the Etherbunny.

File not found. Should I Fake It? (Y/N)

Go ahead, make my data!

Hidden DOS secret: Add BUGS=OFF to your CONFIG.SYS

If all else fails: joe-ks.com

Mainframe: The biggest PC peripheral available.

My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

Press any key... no, No, NO!!! Not THAT one!

Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...

RAM disk is not an installation procedure.

SENILE.COM found... Out Of Memory...

Shell to DOS... Come in DOS, do you copy? Shell to DOS...

Smash forehead on keyboard to continue...

Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)

The name is Baud... James Baud.

Ultimate office automation: Networked Coffee.

Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or filename!"

Who's General Failure & why is he reading My disk?

Windows: Just another pane in the glass.

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Good morning everyboomie.


WELCOME TO THE WEEKEND!!


Ours is going to be a wet one. I wish it would be 4 or 5 inches worth of wet, but I know we're not going to have any flash flooding.


Those all fell in California.


I'll probably be sitting inside, in drizzly rain for two days, with two dogs sitting at my feet staring at me, and wagging their tails.


If I could just get one good flash flood, I'd be wagging my tail too.


You know what they say about wishes though don't you?


Set a bucket out in the rain, hold out your hand, close your eyes and make a wish, and see which one fills up first.


Ok scratch that. Not a good analogy.


Have a happy day everyone.


joe

Have a great Saturday Boomers.

I'm doing the raindance for you, Joe! If the neighbors call the looney bin on me, it's your fault!

SpaceQ, anything fun planned?

Have a happy day all!

Ana

Hello Boomers, hope you are all well!

Been up for hours, can't seem to sleep for long.

Have a great day guys!

Mary

Morning Boom Boom Buddies

Hi Joe Thanks for the funny openers~ found any good
arrowheads lately??

Hi ya space how are you doing?? is it cold where you live??

Hi Ana How are you?? how is Shadow's leg doing??
your little grand baby is sure growing fast!
what a cutie he is

Hi Mary How are you doing? seems like ages since I've talked to you
I've missed you

Hi Gerry I've missed you too~ how are you doing???

Hi Nan how is Sassy doing?? Bella is fat & lazy lol!

Hi Connie how is your weather? is it warm their?

Hi ya Sorta! how are you??

Hi Harola did you get any more snow??

Hi ya L4L are you feeling better?? I hope so Thank you soooo much
for the nice Christmas card~

Hi Midge How are you doing?

Hi Darlene how are you doing? how is your daughter liking
married life??

I'm off to dialysis this morning 10am to 2pm yuk!

its sunny 17% here

Have a nice day boomers~ stay warm & well~Karen

Good morning all,have a great day.

Good Morning Joe, Space, Ana, Mary, Karen, Haroula, and everyone. Coffee, tea, and hot chocolate are ready. Karen I can't image how difficult dialysis is for you. Sending love and prayers your way. Take care. Wishing you all a peaceful day!

Good morning everyone, have a Wonderful Saturday. Above average temps here, upper 70's. Danish, BB Pancakes, Bacon Sandwiches, and French Toast in the NC.

Good morning Boomers.

Super Saturday ya'll

It'll be a busy one here...both boys have basketball games. Dad is going to be at work for 12 hours or more. I'm still trying to keep my distance, so will stay in my room for the day if possible...that depends on Soot's tolerance.

I can't believe what a difference 24 hours makes. At this time yesterday it was -19 feeling like -39 and this morning it was +++++++5 feeling like ++++5!!!! WooHoo!!!

Joe hope the rain brings up some points for you!! Thanks for the chuckles and have a lovely day!

Space welcome to the weekend!! Have a lovely day!

Ana hope you had a very nice anniversary yesterday!! Have a lovely day!

Mary have a lovely day!

Karen Sassy says as long as Bella is happy that's good enough!! Hope all goes well for you and you have a lovely day!

Haroula have a lovely day!

Gerry thanks for the tea and have a lovely day!

Connie thanks for the Danish and have a lovely day!

L4l Hope the eyes heal quickly for you!! Have a lovely day!


Nan

Hi Karen!! Nice to see you around the Diner. Hope your day goes swimmingly. I'm off to play with my 3 kittens, their Mom (if she will ever get close enough) and Uncle Ninja (the only remaining feral from the last litter almost 10 years old now). I'm calling him Uncle Ninja now since the kittens are 'adopting' him as a father figure but he's been fixed long ago so he can't be the father. Uncle Ninja suits him now. He's alternately miffed and proud of the 3 little ones. He's taken to leading them around the yard and 'OH NO' across the driveway and under the fence to the neighbor's yard (part of his territory). Oh well, it's the life of feral cats. 3 little guys are doing great even after the 'fixing'. They don't seem to know anything happened. So weird. Just bounded out of the carriers and started playing around the deck as usual. I'm surprised.

Off to Costly Co today to stock up on stuff. It's been raining and I'm out of things as is my neighbor 'bachelor' guy. He wants a ride to the store to get 'provisions'. He shops about once a month at the most. So weird. I usually ask if he needs anything when I go shopping, but he seems to do well on what he stocks up on. He cooks some weird dishes by combining all sorts of stuff. Not exactly gourmet, but he's not starving.

Rain has stopped for awhile and sun is out. Hopefully things will dry up enough for me to go out and pull 'weeds' I have stinging nettles in some areas of the yard and I have to get a handle on them. Awful things when you touch them, but very pretty plants. They just multiply if you don't pull them before they 'seed'. I've got most of the rogue ones from all over, but there is a huge patch of them along the fence. Gotta glove up, put on heavy socks and start pulling and bagging in plastic so they don't fly around when the trash man collects. If in the 'yard waste' can, they can just reseed all over with the wind. Ugh.

I managed to conquer the castor bean trees over the years. Only ONE remains on the neighbor's property and I am about to sneak over and hack it down. It's seeding my back lot again. They shoot the seeds out of the pods up to 50 feet away. Sounds like a bullet going off. Very fun to watch, BUT they are dangerous plants, propagate like crazy and are a real nuisance. I have to pull up each new seedling as I see it and then the plants don't grow. My back lot was covered with castor bean trees when I moved in. It was a jungle, not kidding.

Lots of gardening for me. Hope my back holds up.

Go Pats!!

Just cheering my team on. It's a surprise. I thought the Pats would easily. Not so. It's a fight. Anyway I'm here cheering them on.

I hope you all had a good day. I have a split shift tomorrow. I have to get to bed soon. Sleep well.

Midgie

Midgie. I just turned on the game and the Pats drove 90 yards for a touchdown to increase their lead to eleven points. My Raiders got beat last week.