Posted By: gymcandy1
TGIF - 04/21/17 03:00 AM
Mark Twain
It’s good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
`````````````````
A successful entrepreneur won a business award in the IT field and was asked by a reporter as to how he managed to motivate his workers to come to office on time.
The entrepreneur replied, "Oh, that' easy. I have 45 people working for me but only 44 parking lots without pay. I charge for the last lot.
```````````````
Justin was caught red-handed misappropriating funds of the organization he worked for. So he ran to his lawyer who assured him by saying, "Relax Justin. You will never go to prison with all that wealth!"
The lawyer was right. Actually when Justin was put behind bars, he did not have a penny on him!
````````````
Mr. Jones says angrily to his secretary Mary, "You are late at work twice this week! What is the meaning of this?"
Mary replies, "It means it's only Tuesday!"
```````````
The Admin Head of a large organization called for the new employee to see him in his office.
Once the new employee was seated, the Admin Head asked, "What's your name?"
The new employee replied, "Jonathan."
The Admin Head snapped, "Listen, I have no idea what kind of a place you worked at before, but out here, I call everyone here by their surnames. If I start calling people by their first names, they would start taking things lightly. So, its Smith, Williams, Brown - that's it. Now that I have made myself clear, tell me your last name."
The new employee said, "My last name is Honey."
The Admin Head said, "Okay Jonathan, I will arrange for your orientation and then...."
``````````````
My boss, Mr. Somel was upset with me for coming late to work.
He shouted at me saying, "You should have been here at 9 am."
I replied, "Why? What happened at 9?"
````````````
The Tata group of companies decided to invite bids for their new Power generation plant. They called for bidders, and three companies decided to bid.
At the meeting, the Project Head of the Tata group asked the first bidder to quote his price.
The CEO of the first company who had done his MBA from Symbiosis said, "5 million. 3 mil for material and 2 mil for labour."
The Project Head then asked the CEO of the second company to present his bid.
The CEO of the second company who had done his MBA from NMIMS said, "10 million. 4 mil for material, 3 mil for labour, and another 3 for variable expenses."
The Project Head then asked the CEO of the third company to present his bid.
The CEO of the third company who was a product of IIM said, "15 million."
The project Head yelled, "15 million!!! What is the breakdown of costs?"
The CEO of the third company replied, "5 million for you. 5 for me. And 5 mil to get the fellow from Symbiosis to do the project."
````````````````
Gabriel was a late-comer. He would always be late to work and had been reprimanded many times by his boss, Mr. Ambrose. The problem with Gabriel was that he just could not get himself to leave the bed in the morning. When he was late once again during the busy last week of the month, Mr. Ambrose gave him a final warning, "One more time you are late, and you are permanently out of here."
Gabriel went to see a doctor and narrated his predicament. The doctor gave him a few medicines and asked him to take it after meals.
Gabriel felt relaxed and got up early in the morning. He had a hearty breakfast and made it to his office before time.
The moment he saw Mr. Ambrose walk in, Gabriel said, "Well Mr. Ambrose, I will not give you a reason to get upset again. I feel fresh as a Daisy!"
"That's okay" said Mr. Ambrose, "But why were you not in office yesterday?"
`````````````
Good morning everyboomie.
Slow day in the diner I see. We usually have at least a dozen post.
Not sure how much longer I'll be able to afford to keep the doors open at that pace.
I guess people got busy Summer activities going on, with traveling and visiting.
I hope everyone is having a good Spring/Summer, and travels safely.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
It’s good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
`````````````````
A successful entrepreneur won a business award in the IT field and was asked by a reporter as to how he managed to motivate his workers to come to office on time.
The entrepreneur replied, "Oh, that' easy. I have 45 people working for me but only 44 parking lots without pay. I charge for the last lot.
```````````````
Justin was caught red-handed misappropriating funds of the organization he worked for. So he ran to his lawyer who assured him by saying, "Relax Justin. You will never go to prison with all that wealth!"
The lawyer was right. Actually when Justin was put behind bars, he did not have a penny on him!
````````````
Mr. Jones says angrily to his secretary Mary, "You are late at work twice this week! What is the meaning of this?"
Mary replies, "It means it's only Tuesday!"
```````````
The Admin Head of a large organization called for the new employee to see him in his office.
Once the new employee was seated, the Admin Head asked, "What's your name?"
The new employee replied, "Jonathan."
The Admin Head snapped, "Listen, I have no idea what kind of a place you worked at before, but out here, I call everyone here by their surnames. If I start calling people by their first names, they would start taking things lightly. So, its Smith, Williams, Brown - that's it. Now that I have made myself clear, tell me your last name."
The new employee said, "My last name is Honey."
The Admin Head said, "Okay Jonathan, I will arrange for your orientation and then...."
``````````````
My boss, Mr. Somel was upset with me for coming late to work.
He shouted at me saying, "You should have been here at 9 am."
I replied, "Why? What happened at 9?"
````````````
The Tata group of companies decided to invite bids for their new Power generation plant. They called for bidders, and three companies decided to bid.
At the meeting, the Project Head of the Tata group asked the first bidder to quote his price.
The CEO of the first company who had done his MBA from Symbiosis said, "5 million. 3 mil for material and 2 mil for labour."
The Project Head then asked the CEO of the second company to present his bid.
The CEO of the second company who had done his MBA from NMIMS said, "10 million. 4 mil for material, 3 mil for labour, and another 3 for variable expenses."
The Project Head then asked the CEO of the third company to present his bid.
The CEO of the third company who was a product of IIM said, "15 million."
The project Head yelled, "15 million!!! What is the breakdown of costs?"
The CEO of the third company replied, "5 million for you. 5 for me. And 5 mil to get the fellow from Symbiosis to do the project."
````````````````
Gabriel was a late-comer. He would always be late to work and had been reprimanded many times by his boss, Mr. Ambrose. The problem with Gabriel was that he just could not get himself to leave the bed in the morning. When he was late once again during the busy last week of the month, Mr. Ambrose gave him a final warning, "One more time you are late, and you are permanently out of here."
Gabriel went to see a doctor and narrated his predicament. The doctor gave him a few medicines and asked him to take it after meals.
Gabriel felt relaxed and got up early in the morning. He had a hearty breakfast and made it to his office before time.
The moment he saw Mr. Ambrose walk in, Gabriel said, "Well Mr. Ambrose, I will not give you a reason to get upset again. I feel fresh as a Daisy!"
"That's okay" said Mr. Ambrose, "But why were you not in office yesterday?"
`````````````
Good morning everyboomie.
Slow day in the diner I see. We usually have at least a dozen post.
Not sure how much longer I'll be able to afford to keep the doors open at that pace.
I guess people got busy Summer activities going on, with traveling and visiting.
I hope everyone is having a good Spring/Summer, and travels safely.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
Good Morning Joe, MaG, soot, Ana and everyone. Joe you give us a special place to gather and share our day. 
Thank you for that! Hi MaG. 
Ana have fun with James. 
