GB HOMEPAGE

Sip and Surf Sunday

Posted By: gymcandy1

Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 02:53 AM

Elizabeth Cady Stanton

The moment we begin to fear the opinions of others and hesitate to tell the truth that is in us, and from motives of policy are silent when we should speak, the divine floods of light and life no longer flow into our souls.

`````````````

I was cuddling with my girlfriend, and she said, “I love lying here with you.”

“I once caught a fish, and it was five feet long and spoke Hebrew,” I replied. She stared at me, confused. “That was my lie,” I said.

“Oh, right. I see. Very funny,” she said. She paused a moment before rolling over. “That was my lie.”

``````````````

I was at the customer-service desk, returning a pair of jeans that was too tight.

“Was anything wrong with them?” the clerk asked.

“Yes,” I said. “They hurt my 
feelings.”

``````````````

During basic training at Fort Leavenworth, our sergeant asked if anyone had 
“artistic” abilities. Having been an architectural draftsman in civilian life, I raised my hand. Then the 
sergeant announced that everyone would get a three-day pass … except me. I would stay behind and neatly print each soldier’s name onto his Army-issued underwear.

````````````

The steaming jungles of Vietnam were not my husband’s first choice 
of places to spend his 21st birthday. However, the mood was brightened when he received a birthday cake from his sister. It was carefully 
encased in a Tupperware container and came with this note: “Dick, when you’re finished, can you mail back my container?”

``````````````

As a Speech therapist, I was working with a preschooler on 
body-part identification and the 
k sound. To that end, I had him 
use Play-Doh to make a sculpture 
of me.

“Is that my neck?” I asked, trying to get him to repeat the word.

“No, that’s your chin,” he said.

He added more Play-Doh. “Is that my neck?” I asked.

“No, that’s your other chin.”

``````````````

Girl: Ick! Why does this sandwich have bacon on it?

Friend: You ordered a BLT.

Girl: Whaaaat? I thought the B stood for bread.

````````````

A salesman talked my uncle into buying 10,000 personalized pens for his business with the promise that 
he would be eligible to win a 32-foot yacht. A born gambler, my uncle agreed.

Well, he won, and a few weeks after the pens arrived, his prize showed up: a 12-inch plastic yacht with 
32 plastic feet glued to the bottom.

``````````

While I was out to lunch, my coworker answered my phone and told the caller that I would be back 
in 20 minutes. The woman asked, 
“Is that 20 minutes Central Standard Time?”

```````````

It’s amazing how a person can compliment and insult you at the same time. Recently, when I greeted my coworker, she said, “You look so gorgeous, I didn’t recognize you.”

````````````

At an art gallery, a woman and her ten-year-old son were having 
a tough time choosing between one of my paintings and another artist’s work. They finally went with mine.

“I guess you decided you prefer an autumn scene to a floral,” I said.

“No,” said the boy. “Your painting’s wider, so it’ll cover three holes in 
our wall.”

```````````

When asked for his name by the coffee shop clerk, my brother-in-law answered, “Marc, with a C.” Minutes later, he was handed his coffee with his name written on the side: Cark.

```````````````

At the mall, my five-year-old grandson joined the other children in line waiting to sit on the Easter Bunny’s lap. When it was his turn, Jake didn’t move; he just stared.

“Don’t you want to sit on the 
bunny’s lap?” I asked.

“No!” he shouted. “There’s 
a man in his mouth!”

````````````````

The black lacquer stand 
holding his prized samurai swords was dusty, so my husband left our cleaning lady a note, reading, “Check out my swords.” That evening, he found the stand just as dirty as 
before but with this appended to 
his note: “Very nice swords.”

```````````````

Good morning everyboomie. wave2


I've had a good day today so far. A sunny hot day. Went and got groceries, and took the barking dogs parking. razz


So it was another day just like the other day. woot


Except that last night was not like the other night, because we had big storms sweep through at about 11:00pm, and straight line wind that left a lot of tree limbs everywhere, and some whole trees down. eek


Everything was copecetic this morning. thumbsup


Have a happy day everyone. woot


joe
Posted By: BrownEyedTigre

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 02:59 AM

Glad you didn't have damage Joe! Sounds like a good day. I've been working since 7am except for a a half hour bike ride at sunset. Ready to jump in the shower now and get back to it. I'm weary.

Have a happy day all! My day will be a repeat of yesterday.

Ana wave
Posted By: soot

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 03:06 AM

Get a good night's rest Ana thumbsup

Glad you weathered the storms Joe!

See you all in the morning yes

wave2
Posted By: venus

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 05:44 AM

Glad you made it through the storm, Joe. Hope it cooled it down for you if nothing else. smile

Sounds tiring, Ana. Hope you get a good night's sleep. smile

Have a great Sunday, soot.

@L4L Regarding your question yesterday, Thorsgoats works tomorrow, but he's off Monday and Tuesday. smile

It's Saturday night here, and tomorrow is day two of my four day weekend. Time for some more gaming and to catch up on Orphan Black. thumbsup

Have a terrific Sunday, everyone. summer
Posted By: Kaki's Sister

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 09:24 AM

summer Good Morning Joe, Ana, soot, venus and everyone. Glad you had no damage from the storms. Ana hope you get a break from work! Soot see you in the Garden! Venus good to hear you have a 4 day week ahead!
Coffee and tea are ready. Wishing everyone a sunny day! summer
Posted By: connie

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 12:33 PM

Good morning everyone, have Great Sunday. Breakfast out and a BJ's trip today. Danish, Eggs, Bacon, Sausage, Ham, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, Biscuits and Gravy, and French Toast in the NC. summer USA
Posted By: GBC

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 12:43 PM

Good Morning Boomers: smile

Joe, glad you got through the bad weather.

Ana, good morning and good day wishes.

Venus, glad you're enjoying your vacation time.

Soot, have a great day!

Gerry, sunny day wishes to you also.

Connie, Toast actually sounds good this morning. Enjoy the day!

A great day wished to All! joy
Posted By: Sorta Blonde

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 04:40 PM

Happy Sunday. Cool, calm. Outdoorsies all fed and petted. So far no sign of the constant 'company' at my Tenant's. It's summer, everyone visits them in groups or alone for a week or more each. Big family, and this is the vacation destination for everyone. San Diego, Sea World, San Diego Zoo, Balboa Park, the beaches, Mission Bay Amusement Park, boating, sports, and close to Disneyland (2 hours if there is traffic). No wonder everyone wants to come here for fun and sun. Wall to wall people sleeping on the floor down there. Happy people. Downside for me is the water bill.
Posted By: looney4labs

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 05:25 PM

Super Sunday ya'll puppy

I was busily working in the kitchen when, all of a sudden, the water stopped working. Called hubby who had taken the dogs and gone downstairs to clear floor space. He's been busily working since then. We have water in the rest of the house, just not the kitchen.

Joe, do you have trees near our house?

Ana, hope you are soon free.

Venus, enjoy your day.

Gerry wavegirl

That's quite a spread, Connie. Thanks.

Connie, hope your day is great.

Sorta, I remember family visits when lots of us had to sleep on the floor. And I remember when family all converged at mil's house, and we broke her plumbing...just too many folks at once. Glad your tenants don't have wall-to-wall company right now.

Soot kissy
Posted By: Space Quest Fan

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 05:31 PM

Have fun Venus. It was a good episode.

Good afternoon Boomers. smile
Posted By: soot

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 09:52 PM

L4L hearts

Kitchen faucet problem solved...an internal part had a stroke (electronic solenoid) so converted faucet to manual ops and works like a champ...the old fashioned way...we have water in the kitchen; that's a must!!...whew!! joy

How's your day going Venus? ...I hope smoothly

How was 8-8 Panda last night Connie ... I see you survived

Wishing you a wonderful Sunday Gail

Hey SortaB woot

Have a SuperSunday Gerry (yes, see you in the Garden)

Hey SQF...how are you doing this afternoon?

Off to Garden...catch you all later wave2
Posted By: Space Quest Fan

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/02/17 10:44 PM

Doing good soot. What is happening down south?
Posted By: looney4labs

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/03/17 01:58 AM

Not a lot, Space. It's hot enough to melt lava, so we are staying in. Just finished a really good dinner. We've been watching old mystery shows all day but it's getting to be about that time wavegirl
Posted By: Space Quest Fan

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/03/17 02:22 AM

It is that time for me looney. See you all tomorrow. sleep
Posted By: looney4labs

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/03/17 02:48 AM

Sweet dreams all sleep
Posted By: venus

Re: Sip and Surf Sunday - 07/03/17 06:02 AM

Good night, everyone. sleep
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