Posted By: gymcandy1
Sip and Surf Sunday Joe's - 11/04/18 01:12 AM
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
~Greg King~
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Lame One Liners | Part 4
When everything’s coming your way – perhaps you’re in the wrong direction on the highway?
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I have clean conscience. I haven’t used it once till now.
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Condoms don’t equal safe sex. Her husband found us and things got anything but safe.
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The best thing about good old days is that we were neither good, nor old.
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Dentist: "You need a crown."
-
Patient: "Finally someone who understands me"
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It’s all a matter of viewpoint. 250 lbs here on Earth is 94.5 lbs on Mercury. Fat? No. I’m just not on the right planet.
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A cannibal came home late to family dinner. He got the cold shoulder.
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A magician driving down the road turned into a shopping mall.
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I do say no to drugs. It’s just they’re not so good at listening.
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How to make a hot dog stand?
Take its chair away.
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You can’t fire me! Slaves can only be sold!!
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If you forget to pay for exorcism, will you get repossessed?
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Future. The time you’ll wish you’d done more in the current present
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I kept feeding money into the change machine yesterday, but nothing changed!
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I will never forget my dad’s last words: “Will you stop playing with the bow, Nicholas?!”
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I don’t think it would work between us, Larry. You know, I’m a Libra and you’re an pig.
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“The trouble with internet quotes is that it’s extremely hard to ascertain their true origin.”
Abraham Lincoln
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Living with a woman is a lot like far*ting. If you push too much, you’re really going to wish you hadn’t.
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That awkward moment when you enthusiastically try to tickle somebody who isn’t ticklish.
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Good morning everyboomie.
If you didn't set your clock back, you may have been waiting a while for your coffee.
Just think, this time tomorrow won't be this time.
I'm excited though because the clock in my truck will finally be right again.
Most people are excited to gain an extra hours sleep, but I take an extra hour to sleep every day. Sometimes two.
I do get kinda excited when I have an extra hour I can stay up at night though.
It takes me back to my younger days when I knew I didn't have to get up early.
Of course now I don't have to get up early unless I have some appointment, but now I can hardly stay awake past 10:00 anyway.
Have a happy day plus an hour everyone.
joe
~Greg King~
```````````
Lame One Liners | Part 4
When everything’s coming your way – perhaps you’re in the wrong direction on the highway?
````
I have clean conscience. I haven’t used it once till now.
````
Condoms don’t equal safe sex. Her husband found us and things got anything but safe.
````
The best thing about good old days is that we were neither good, nor old.
````
Dentist: "You need a crown."
-
Patient: "Finally someone who understands me"
````
It’s all a matter of viewpoint. 250 lbs here on Earth is 94.5 lbs on Mercury. Fat? No. I’m just not on the right planet.
````
A cannibal came home late to family dinner. He got the cold shoulder.
````
A magician driving down the road turned into a shopping mall.
````
I do say no to drugs. It’s just they’re not so good at listening.
````
How to make a hot dog stand?
Take its chair away.
````
You can’t fire me! Slaves can only be sold!!
````
If you forget to pay for exorcism, will you get repossessed?
````
Future. The time you’ll wish you’d done more in the current present
````
I kept feeding money into the change machine yesterday, but nothing changed!
````
I will never forget my dad’s last words: “Will you stop playing with the bow, Nicholas?!”
````
I don’t think it would work between us, Larry. You know, I’m a Libra and you’re an pig.
````
“The trouble with internet quotes is that it’s extremely hard to ascertain their true origin.”
Abraham Lincoln
````
Living with a woman is a lot like far*ting. If you push too much, you’re really going to wish you hadn’t.
````
That awkward moment when you enthusiastically try to tickle somebody who isn’t ticklish.
````
Good morning everyboomie.
If you didn't set your clock back, you may have been waiting a while for your coffee.
Just think, this time tomorrow won't be this time.
I'm excited though because the clock in my truck will finally be right again.
Most people are excited to gain an extra hours sleep, but I take an extra hour to sleep every day. Sometimes two.
I do get kinda excited when I have an extra hour I can stay up at night though.
It takes me back to my younger days when I knew I didn't have to get up early.
Of course now I don't have to get up early unless I have some appointment, but now I can hardly stay awake past 10:00 anyway.
Have a happy day plus an hour everyone.
joe
Wishing you all a great Sunday! 
It's the last day of my 3 day weekend. I have to arrange my schedule for the upcoming week. Hopefully, I'll be able to include another 3 day weekend, but it depends on what each project entails, as I have several stores to go to this week. Also, I'm hoping to fit in some gaming today as well. 
and Good night 
or good luck watching your favorite team play.. 
