Posted By: gymcandy1
Surf and Turf Saturdiner - 11/17/18 01:23 AM
We’ve all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.
-
Robert Wilensky
```````````````
Cute Jokes Part 2
Best first:
Two fish are swimming about in a tank. One turns to another and wonders, “How exactly do you drive this thing?”
````
One day, fridges will take their revenge. They will burst into your bedroom in the middle of the night, switch the light on, stare at you for a few minutes and then leave.
```
Why was the teacher cross-eyed?
Her pupils got out of control.
````
Why did the bee have sticky hair?
Because he was using a honey-comb.
````
How to make an egg giggle?
Tell it a yolk.
````
What to call a bear who’s lost all its teeth? – A gummy bear!
````
What bird can lift the most?
A crane.
````
What did mama broom say to baby broom?
Time to go to sweep, baby.
````
What gives us milk and has one horn?
A milk truck.
````
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Iva.
Iva who?
Iva craving for cookies. Get to baking!
````
When can you be sure a snail is lying to you?
When he says he’s not home.
````
Q: Which flower is the most talkative?
A: Tulips, of course, they can’t keep those lips shut!
````
Q: Why couldn't the pony sing his baby a lullaby?
A: She was a little hoarse.
````
Q: What did the tall chimney say to the small chimney?
A: "Hey, you’re way too young to smoke."
````
Two friends are talking, one says: “Man, I fell off a thirty-foot long ladder yesterday.”
“Oh no, dude, are you alright?!” inquires the other one, shocked.
“Yeah, I’m OK, I was only on the second rung.”
````
How does a monkey ring the doorbell?
-
King Kong! King Kong!
````
How do you measure a snake?
In inches.
Snakes don’t have feet.
````
Good morning everyboomie.
It's SATURDAY!!!!
I think........therefore I said it.
It's going to be another sunny mid 60s day here.
Friday was fantastic. I took Missy to the park in the morning, and then I left to go to the creek at about 11:30.
It was great weather, but it was punishing to walk the creek. Still a lot of heavy brush, and thorny vines, AND I forgot it's deer season and people were shooting guns around there, AND I didn't find anything.
Ah well, some other day.
I imagine I'll be doing home chores Saturday.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
-
Robert Wilensky
```````````````
Cute Jokes Part 2
Best first:
Two fish are swimming about in a tank. One turns to another and wonders, “How exactly do you drive this thing?”
````
One day, fridges will take their revenge. They will burst into your bedroom in the middle of the night, switch the light on, stare at you for a few minutes and then leave.
```
Why was the teacher cross-eyed?
Her pupils got out of control.
````
Why did the bee have sticky hair?
Because he was using a honey-comb.
````
How to make an egg giggle?
Tell it a yolk.
````
What to call a bear who’s lost all its teeth? – A gummy bear!
````
What bird can lift the most?
A crane.
````
What did mama broom say to baby broom?
Time to go to sweep, baby.
````
What gives us milk and has one horn?
A milk truck.
````
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Iva.
Iva who?
Iva craving for cookies. Get to baking!
````
When can you be sure a snail is lying to you?
When he says he’s not home.
````
Q: Which flower is the most talkative?
A: Tulips, of course, they can’t keep those lips shut!
````
Q: Why couldn't the pony sing his baby a lullaby?
A: She was a little hoarse.
````
Q: What did the tall chimney say to the small chimney?
A: "Hey, you’re way too young to smoke."
````
Two friends are talking, one says: “Man, I fell off a thirty-foot long ladder yesterday.”
“Oh no, dude, are you alright?!” inquires the other one, shocked.
“Yeah, I’m OK, I was only on the second rung.”
````
How does a monkey ring the doorbell?
-
King Kong! King Kong!
````
How do you measure a snake?
In inches.
Snakes don’t have feet.
````
Good morning everyboomie.
It's SATURDAY!!!!
I think........therefore I said it.
It's going to be another sunny mid 60s day here.
Friday was fantastic. I took Missy to the park in the morning, and then I left to go to the creek at about 11:30.
It was great weather, but it was punishing to walk the creek. Still a lot of heavy brush, and thorny vines, AND I forgot it's deer season and people were shooting guns around there, AND I didn't find anything.
Ah well, some other day.
I imagine I'll be doing home chores Saturday.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
Saturday
Venus enjoy your gaming! 
Coffee and tea are ready.
Wishing everyone a relaxing Saturday! 
