Posted By: gymcandy1
Sip and Surf Sunday - 12/02/18 01:47 AM
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go. -
~Oscar Wilde~
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Funny Sayings | Part 3 | Silly and Inspirational
Best first:
There are things in the world I wouldn't mention even to myself.
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If a man said he’ll fix it, he’ll fix it. There is no need to nag him every 6 months about it.
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You look just like I feel...
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I’m pretty sure some people’s head is just a backup copy of their butt.
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What do I have in common with a Victoria’s Secret best model? I’m hungry, too.
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Before you say something harsh about someone, try walking a mile in their shoes. It’s very convenient because even if you’re really rude, you’re a mile away AND you’ve got their shoes
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F*art when people hug you. You’ll make them feel strong.
````
I didn’t fall down. I did attack the floor though.
````
How stupid are you? a) very b) A c) B
````
Funny that you can't spell "slaughter" without "laughter".
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We got divorced on the grounds of religious differences. My husband thought he was God.
````
Money alone won’t make you happy. You’ve got to own it.
````
A sound defense: Crazy? Me? Nah - It was the voices that told me to do it.
````
I speak fluent Ironic with a solid sarcastic accent.
````
I used to think that you were a pain in the neck. My opinion of you has dropped significantly lower since then.
````
I’ve been single for so many years I believe I will soon become an album.
````
It is a truth universally acknowledged that your urge to pee intensifies as you are unlocking the door.
````
Sorry, I can’t hang out. My auntie’s cousin’s brother in law’s best friend’s accountant’s roommate’s pet goldfish died. Some other time maybe.
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I had loads to do today. Ah well, so now I have loads to do tomorrow.
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All my life I thought air was for free. That was until I bought a bag of chips.
````
Of course you're not fat. Just grab a couple of chairs and come sit with us.
````
Good morning everyboomie.
Ah Sunday at last. I've been eagerly waiting for it ever since Saturday night.
Actually Sunday is the last of our descent, warm days. After today the temperatures all go South for the Winter. Well, for a week or so anyway.
The Cowboys played Thursday, so I'll be watching whatever other games are on.
Other than that I have no big plans.
Time for me to go watch that Cowboy game again on DVR.
I've only seen it twice three times.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
~Oscar Wilde~
`````````````
Funny Sayings | Part 3 | Silly and Inspirational
Best first:
There are things in the world I wouldn't mention even to myself.
````
If a man said he’ll fix it, he’ll fix it. There is no need to nag him every 6 months about it.
````
You look just like I feel...
````
I’m pretty sure some people’s head is just a backup copy of their butt.
````
What do I have in common with a Victoria’s Secret best model? I’m hungry, too.
````
Before you say something harsh about someone, try walking a mile in their shoes. It’s very convenient because even if you’re really rude, you’re a mile away AND you’ve got their shoes
````
F*art when people hug you. You’ll make them feel strong.
````
I didn’t fall down. I did attack the floor though.
````
How stupid are you? a) very b) A c) B
````
Funny that you can't spell "slaughter" without "laughter".
````
We got divorced on the grounds of religious differences. My husband thought he was God.
````
Money alone won’t make you happy. You’ve got to own it.
````
A sound defense: Crazy? Me? Nah - It was the voices that told me to do it.
````
I speak fluent Ironic with a solid sarcastic accent.
````
I used to think that you were a pain in the neck. My opinion of you has dropped significantly lower since then.
````
I’ve been single for so many years I believe I will soon become an album.
````
It is a truth universally acknowledged that your urge to pee intensifies as you are unlocking the door.
````
Sorry, I can’t hang out. My auntie’s cousin’s brother in law’s best friend’s accountant’s roommate’s pet goldfish died. Some other time maybe.
````
I had loads to do today. Ah well, so now I have loads to do tomorrow.
````
All my life I thought air was for free. That was until I bought a bag of chips.
````
Of course you're not fat. Just grab a couple of chairs and come sit with us.
````
Good morning everyboomie.
Ah Sunday at last. I've been eagerly waiting for it ever since Saturday night.
Actually Sunday is the last of our descent, warm days. After today the temperatures all go South for the Winter. Well, for a week or so anyway.
The Cowboys played Thursday, so I'll be watching whatever other games are on.
Other than that I have no big plans.
Time for me to go watch that Cowboy game again on DVR.
I've only seen it twice three times.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
Hopefully, I'll be able to get some practice in also.
