Posted By: curly
Rhymes.(Hints) - 11/09/16 08:45 AM
Here are ten little stories that suggest "punch lines" that consist of two or more homophones. (For example: What do you call a letter that is never sent? A - stationary stationery.) Bonne chance!
-1.When I was young, my grandmother taught me to knit. I made a couple of sweaters for myself and packed them away. Unfortunately, I forgot to pack them with mothballs and when I took them out again, suffice to say, there was very little of them left. In fact, you could say that they were: (W - 6 letters; H - five letters)
2.For her outdoor wedding, a friend of mine thought that it would be stylish to arrive to the ceremony on horseback. However, as she approached the park by unlucky chance the headstall broke and she lost control of her mount! On what could this matrimonial malchance be blamed? (B - 6 letters; B - six letters) Think bride.
-3.An entertainer friend of mine used to make some extra cash by singing, reciting poetry and telling stories at parties. At one function my friend had too much to drink, insulted the hostess, and somehow managed to damage a priceless antique table. Suffice to say he is no longer hired to entertain, and you could say that he is a: (B - 6 letters; B - 4 letters)
-4.Way back in the day, before the advent of calculators, my father used a slide rule for complex maths like trigonometry. One day during an important exam, the component with the vertical alignment line broke off and my father swore at it. What might you call my unfortunate father? (C - 6 letters; C - 6 letters)
-5.Once when I was little and I hadn't studied for a test, I said I was too sick to go to school and pretended to swoon. "Well," my mother, a wise woman, said, "if you are too sick to go to school then you are too sick to eat these cookies." "Cookies?" I said, and jumped up off the floor. What might you call this failed bit of trickery? (F - 5 letters; F - 5 letters)
-6.At a fancy restaurant I ordered a glass of sherry from the appetizer menu. I suppose you could call it a: (W - 3 letters; W - 4 letters)
-7.For one of his birthday parties, my friend Dan wrote parts for a Murder Mystery and had all of the party attendees act it out. While I hadn't been assigned the part of the murderer, I must have acted quite sinister because everyone speculated at the end that it was I. In fact, you could say that I was the: (G - 7 letters; G - 5 letters)
-8.While vacationing in Spain I had the opportunity to witness the famous Running of the Bulls in Pamplona. Just as it seemed one of the runners was about to be speared by one of the bulls' fearsome horns, the bull broke out of the corridor and assaulted a nearby melon stand instead. What might you call the result of the fruit vendor's bad luck? (G - 5 letters; G - 5 letters)
-9.An American friend of mine was so good at her job that her employer sent her to Japan to supervise a new project. In fact, you could say that she now: (O - 8 letters; O - 8 letters)
-10.The manager of a hardware store accidentally ordered too many of a certain woodworking tool. In order to help draw customers' attention to the item, the manager calls the company who prints their catalogue and specifies that he wants it shown on several different pages. In other words, he: (A - 4 letters; A - 3)
-1.When I was young, my grandmother taught me to knit. I made a couple of sweaters for myself and packed them away. Unfortunately, I forgot to pack them with mothballs and when I took them out again, suffice to say, there was very little of them left. In fact, you could say that they were: (W - 6 letters; H - five letters)
2.For her outdoor wedding, a friend of mine thought that it would be stylish to arrive to the ceremony on horseback. However, as she approached the park by unlucky chance the headstall broke and she lost control of her mount! On what could this matrimonial malchance be blamed? (B - 6 letters; B - six letters) Think bride.
-3.An entertainer friend of mine used to make some extra cash by singing, reciting poetry and telling stories at parties. At one function my friend had too much to drink, insulted the hostess, and somehow managed to damage a priceless antique table. Suffice to say he is no longer hired to entertain, and you could say that he is a: (B - 6 letters; B - 4 letters)
-4.Way back in the day, before the advent of calculators, my father used a slide rule for complex maths like trigonometry. One day during an important exam, the component with the vertical alignment line broke off and my father swore at it. What might you call my unfortunate father? (C - 6 letters; C - 6 letters)
-5.Once when I was little and I hadn't studied for a test, I said I was too sick to go to school and pretended to swoon. "Well," my mother, a wise woman, said, "if you are too sick to go to school then you are too sick to eat these cookies." "Cookies?" I said, and jumped up off the floor. What might you call this failed bit of trickery? (F - 5 letters; F - 5 letters)
-6.At a fancy restaurant I ordered a glass of sherry from the appetizer menu. I suppose you could call it a: (W - 3 letters; W - 4 letters)
-7.For one of his birthday parties, my friend Dan wrote parts for a Murder Mystery and had all of the party attendees act it out. While I hadn't been assigned the part of the murderer, I must have acted quite sinister because everyone speculated at the end that it was I. In fact, you could say that I was the: (G - 7 letters; G - 5 letters)
-8.While vacationing in Spain I had the opportunity to witness the famous Running of the Bulls in Pamplona. Just as it seemed one of the runners was about to be speared by one of the bulls' fearsome horns, the bull broke out of the corridor and assaulted a nearby melon stand instead. What might you call the result of the fruit vendor's bad luck? (G - 5 letters; G - 5 letters)
-9.An American friend of mine was so good at her job that her employer sent her to Japan to supervise a new project. In fact, you could say that she now: (O - 8 letters; O - 8 letters)
-10.The manager of a hardware store accidentally ordered too many of a certain woodworking tool. In order to help draw customers' attention to the item, the manager calls the company who prints their catalogue and specifies that he wants it shown on several different pages. In other words, he: (A - 4 letters; A - 3)
