GAMEBOOMERS provides you with all the latest PC adventure computer games information, forum, walkthroughs, reviews and news.

GB Reviews

Latest & Upcoming Adventure Games

GB Annual Game Lists

GB Interviews

BAAGS

GB @ acebook

About Us

Walkthroughs

free games galore

Game Publishers & Developers

World of Adventure

Patches

GB @ witter

GameBoomers Store

Big Fish Games Homepage
Print Thread
Magnificent Monday #1101294
02/19/17 08:33 PM
02/19/17 08:33 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 32,837
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Sonic Boomer
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 32,837
Calera, Oklahoma
Inspiration is wonderful when it happens, but the writer must develop an approach for the rest of the time... The wait is simply too long.

Leonard Bernstein (1918 - 1990)

``````````````````

MY LAST TRIP TO WALMART


Yesterday I was at my local Walmart buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Fred, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant?

On impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stopped to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Walmart won't let me shop there anymore!

`````````````````


A blind man enters a Ladies bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender: "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says: "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair - giving that you are blind - that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6 feet tall, 160 LB. blonde
woman with a black belt in Karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is
blonde and is a professional
weightlifter.
5. The lady to your right is a blonde
and is a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head and declares: "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times".
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once there was a man who every week bought a lottery ticket in the local liquor store. He really didn't expect to win until one day he jumped in joy when he found out that he won 30 million dollars. The man immidiatly ran to his car, drove home at full speed, pulled up the drive way, ran inside the house slamed the front door behind him. As soon as he saw his wife, he said "Honey, I've won the lottery so pack your bags!!!" The man's wife leaping in joy asked him; "What should I pack for?, for hiking, mountain climbing or sun bathing honey!?"

"For what ever you want, Just make sure you're out by the end of the week!!!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once upon a time, Hercules, Snow White and Quasimoto were talking over a
picnic lunch.

Hercules said, "You know everyone says I'm the strongest mortal on earth,
but I don't know how to prove it. That bothers me a lot."

Snow White said, "you're right! Everyone says I'm the fairest, but how can
I be sure?"

Quasimoto agrees. "Yeah, and I'm supposed to be the ugliest!"

Suddenly Snow White has an idea. "You know, guys, I've got the answer.
Let's pray about this and ask God to tell us the truth."

Hercules said, "Great. Let's meet tomorrow and tell our tales."

The next day they meet at a restaurant in town. Hercules said, "I talked
to God, and He said I'm the strongest."

Snow White said, "As did I, and I'm the truly the fairest."

Quasimoto had his head bowed, as he shamefully asked, "Who is Janet Reno?"

````````````````

An elderly couple had been dating for some time and decided it was
finally time to marry.

Before the wedding they embarked on a long conversation regarding how
their marriage might work. They discussed finances, living arrangements
and so on.

Finally the old man decided it was time to broach the subject of their
sexual relationship...

"How do you feel about sex?" he asked, rather hopefully.

"Well, I'd have to say I like it infrequently," she responded.

The old guy paused....then he asked, "Was that one word or two?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Giraffe and bunny meet up in the forest. Giraffe, in his usual arrogant way starts up a conversation.
"So, bunny, do you know how great it is to have such a long neck?" he asks, a faint tone of smugness in his voice.
"I'm sure I don't," replies bunny, obviously not really that interested.
"Well, to begin with, when I'm hungry and I chew my beautiful leaves, how can I describe the sensation of the leaves going down my throat....they go down and down and down....it's one hour of sheer pleasure."
"Really, how fascinating," replies bunny, one eyebrow raised.
Oblivious to bunny's lack of enthusiasm, giraffe continues, "And when I'm thirsty, and I drink water, for a full hour it goes down....and down....and down...It's heaven on earth!"
"Amazing," comments bunny,"but just one question. Have you ever thrown up?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie. welcome


Sometime today while my love is away,
I'll put in my teeth and I'll go out to play.
I'll give the old gals on my block a big smile,
they'll run from their yards and they'll chase me a while.
Then when I'm back home, and my love doth return,
she'll ask how my day was with loving concern.
I'll tell her I followed my Doctor's advice,
and went out for some aerobic exercise.


Another magic Monday is upon us. witch


The magic is how our weekend disappeared in a puff of smoke. eek


I think actually it was more like a bolt of lightening here. We had some overnight storms. yes


Technically it's still Sunday night, and the storms are forecast for tonight, and I don't expect to get any sleep.....again, because my Baby is very afraid of storms, but that's ok. I'll stay awake all night and cuddle her if I have to, no problem. hearts


Storms Monday morning too, and then I'll be on pins and needles waiting until Wednesday, or Thursday so I can go back out to the sod farm. happydance


Tis the season. wink


I've waited all Winter, and all else can wait for me now. razz


Have a happy day everyone.


joe


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101296
02/19/17 09:17 PM
02/19/17 09:17 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 78,077
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Online happy
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Online Happy
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 78,077
In the Naughty Corner
Good for you, Joe! I hope the rain uncovers lots of points for you!

Have a happy day all!

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101309
02/20/17 04:30 AM
02/20/17 04:30 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 24,129
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
True Blue Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
True Blue Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 24,129
Marlborough USA
wave Good Morning Joe, Ana and everyone. Coffee and tea are ready. Enjoy your day! wave


Gerry
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101311
02/20/17 04:40 AM
02/20/17 04:40 AM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Haroula Offline
Adept Boomer
Haroula  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Good morning everyone,glad to be back. happydance
I had the flu, then hubby follows then a thunder hit
near us and no phone and internet and then my laptop
charger was off for a week... hardwall
Anyway now everything its ok. joy
Have all a happy day. wavegirl


I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".

Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101315
02/20/17 04:46 AM
02/20/17 04:46 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 24,129
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
True Blue Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
True Blue Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 24,129
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Haroula. You've been missed. Glad to hear you are feeling better! wave


Gerry
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101317
02/20/17 05:15 AM
02/20/17 05:15 AM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
Haroula Offline
Adept Boomer
Haroula  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 10,027
Greece
heartsGerry


I change all my passwords to "incorrect". So whenever I forget, it says, "your password is incorrect".

Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101321
02/20/17 07:07 AM
02/20/17 07:07 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 11,675
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Adept Boomer
connie  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 11,675
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Super Monday. Thanks everyone for the hugs and prayers for Madeline. catrub Danish, BB Pancakes, Bacon Sandwiches, and Biscuits and Gravy in the NC. wavegirl


Connie
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101330
02/20/17 08:34 AM
02/20/17 08:34 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Good Morning Boomers penguin

Joe, hope the storms aren't bad. May uncover more heads.

Ana, have a great day.

Haroula, welcome back. Glad you're feeling better.

Gerry, thanks for the coffee.

Connie, wishing you a good day!

Good day wishes to everyone! wavegirl


Gail
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101337
02/20/17 10:00 AM
02/20/17 10:00 AM
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
niteowl07 Offline
BAAG Specialist
niteowl07  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 9,029
the dusty desert
good morning everyone ! wave

glad you're doing ok now , haroula !

thanks for coffee !

joe , did you sleep better ?

happy shopping ana !

off to get ready for the bug people - see you all later !

have a great day !

catrub wave2

Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101339
02/20/17 10:10 AM
02/20/17 10:10 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,261
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Moderator
looney4labs  Offline
Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,261
Alabama
Magnificent Monday ya'll puppy

Son at work. Hanging with the g'sons!

Haroula, glad you are back.

Joe, hope you got some sleep.

Ana, is Peter back at his place now?

Gerry, wave

Connie, Biscuits and gravy is the perfect way to start this day. Thanks.

Gail, how's life?

Niteowl, anything funon the agenda after the bug people leave?


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: looney4labs] #1101342
02/20/17 10:22 AM
02/20/17 10:22 AM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 32,837
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Sonic Boomer
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 32,837
Calera, Oklahoma
Good morning everybody. wave2

Welcome back Haroula. We missed you. bravo

The storms hit here at 2 am, and didn't last too long, but there was no sleeping after that. I had one dog on each side. I was the hot dog in the middle. lol

I'm dog tired now. wink

I keep telling myself I'm going to get up and run, or do exercises, but all my body wants to do is lay back down. sleep

We got quite a bit of rain. The storms only lasted 20 or 30 minutes though. It's still very overcast, but supposed to lighten up soon. yes

We're going to be low 70s to low 80s the next three days. shocked

I hope everyone has a super day.

Ana good luck with the car purchase. thumbsup


joe


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101353
02/20/17 11:30 AM
02/20/17 11:30 AM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,623
northern Wisconsin
auntiegram Offline
Adept Boomer
auntiegram  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 14,623
northern Wisconsin
Joe hope the short storm unearthed some nice points for you!! Thanks for the chuckles and have a lovely day!

Ana great choices!! Wishing you luck and sending the Band to help keep your old one working for you!! Have a lovely day!

Garry thanks for the tea and have a lovely day!

Haroula missed you and glad you are feeling better now and the internet is up and running now!! Have a lovely day!

Aw Connie HUGS!!! Hard thing to do. Know the feeling. Thanks for the Danish and have a lovely day!

Gail have a lovely day!

niteowl hope they get all those bugs and you have a lovely day!

L4l hope MIL is continuing to improve! HUGS! Have a lovely day!

wave
Nan

Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101359
02/20/17 12:01 PM
02/20/17 12:01 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,821
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,821
San Diego, CA
Dry today for awhile. Sunny nice. I'm thinking about picking up MORE dead tree branches. Someone stop me! I'm still in pain from the last round. Still, gotta get it done so we can mow the yard. Where is the magic wand to just wave it all away? joy


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: Sorta Blonde] #1101380
02/20/17 03:28 PM
02/20/17 03:28 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,086
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,086
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good afternoon everyone. wave


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101387
02/20/17 04:38 PM
02/20/17 04:38 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,261
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Moderator
looney4labs  Offline
Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,261
Alabama
Good afternoon, Space. Welcome home wavegirl


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: looney4labs] #1101390
02/20/17 05:14 PM
02/20/17 05:14 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,086
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,086
Upper Arlington, Ohio
thanks looney. smile


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101403
02/20/17 09:00 PM
02/20/17 09:00 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,261
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Moderator
looney4labs  Offline
Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,261
Alabama
Okay, off to bed. Sweet dreams all sleep


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: looney4labs] #1101406
02/20/17 09:41 PM
02/20/17 09:41 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,086
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,086
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good night Boomers. sleep


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Magnificent Monday [Re: gymcandy1] #1101409
02/20/17 10:19 PM
02/20/17 10:19 PM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Midge Offline
Graduate Boomer
Midge  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 15,630
Massachusetts
Time to call it a night. Sleep well everyone.

Midgie hearts wavegirl


Just do it.
Previous Thread
Index
Next Thread

Moderated by  BrownEyedTigre, looney4labs 

Who's Online Now
4 registered members (manxman, BrownEyedTigre, Marian, jboliver), 245 guests, and 4 spiders.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Staff, Mod
Newest Members
leri, AlexGamechuck, Guppy, tonierm, stigmamax
9106 Registered Users
Powered by UBB.threads™