GAMEBOOMERS provides you with all the latest PC adventure computer games information, forum, walkthroughs, reviews and news.

GB Reviews

Latest & Upcoming Adventure Games

GB Annual Game Lists

GB Interviews

BAAGS

GB @ acebook

About Us

Walkthroughs

free games galore

Game Publishers & Developers

World of Adventure

Patches

GB @ witter

GameBoomers Store

Print Thread
Monday's #1139915
01/28/18 09:05 PM
01/28/18 09:05 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
The greatest gift of life is friendship, and I have received it.

~Hubert H. Humphrey~
````````````````````




These mistakes have been collected from Sundayschool teachers, Catholic school teachers and others


This comes from a Catholic elementary school. Kids were asked questions about the Old and New Testaments.


In the first book of the bible, Guinessis, God got tired of creating the world, so he took the Sabbath off.


Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. Noah’s wife was called Joan of Ark. Noah built an ark, which the animals come on to in pears.


Lot’s wife was a pillar of salt by day, but a ball of fire by night.


The Jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble with the unsympathetic Genitals.


Samson was a strong man who let himself be led astray by a Jezebel like Delilah.


Samson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the Apostles.


Moses led the Hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread which is bread without any ingredients.


The Egyptians were all drowned in the dessert. Afterwards, Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten ammendments.


The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.


The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.


Moses died before he ever reached Canada. Then Joshua led the Hebrews in the battle of Geritol.


The greatest miracle in the Bible is when Joshua told his son to stand still and he obeyed him.


David was a Hebrew king skilled at playing the liar. He fought with the Finklesteins, race of people who lived in Biblical times.


Solomon, one of David’s sons, had 300 wives and 700 porcupines.


When Mary heard that she was the mother of Jesus, she sang the Magna Carta.


When the three wise guys from the East side arrived, they found Jesus in the manager.


Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.


St. John the blacksmith dumped water on his head.


Jesus enunciated the Golden Rule, which says to do one to others before they do one to you. He also explained, “a man doth not live by sweat alone.”


It was a miracle when Jesus rose from the dead and managed to get the tombstone off the entrance.


The people who followed the Lord were called the 12 decibels.


The epistles were the wives of the apostles.


One of the oppossums was St. Matthew who was also a taximan.


St. Paul cavorted to Christianity. He preached holy acrimony, which is another name for marriage.


Christians have only one spouse. This is called monotony.

```````````````

BEST FUNNY REDNECK PICKUP LINES

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d sure shootin’ put U and me together.

I may not have as many teeth as Fred Flinstone, but wanna watch me make my bedrock?

Your eyes are the same color as my 1972 Ford Pickup Truck. I mean without the mud. Or the nude girl on the mud flaps.

Howdy. You’re not the kinda unchristian girl that goes out drinking and then spends the night with the first loser she meets are ya? Well then, how about your uglier friend there?

Well, aren’t you hotter than a mama cougar in heat running from my hunting dogs in August?

Hey Baby. Wanna go back to my place? Mamma said you had to be home by 11 anyway.

Can I make you a drink? My still is in the back of my camper- Or as I call it- my sheep shack.

Well, tie me to a pig and roll me in the mud! You are mighty purdy for a heavy girl.

Can I borrow your t-shirt? I gotta go wipe the oil off my dip stick.

If I had a garden, I’d put your tulips next to my tulips. And then plant some watermelon and probably a few tomato plants. It’s a little late in the year for lettuce, but we might be able to still get a few green beans to grow, iffen we add enough fertilizer, and give ‘em a lot of evening water since day water can just kill off those suckers right quick, cuz of how strong the sun is and those water beads just act like a magnifier, which is great for zapping those sunbich aphids but don’t do the vegetables no good at all which is why- what was we talking about?

Tell me honey ham, did it hurt when the devil spit you up and you landed here?

Hi there darling. Wow, I bet you were really hot when you were about my age!

Roses are red. Spend the night with me and I’ll teach you all kinds of cool scientific stuff like that!

You’re hair is just about as purdy as that squirrel’s I skinned this morning. And it smells just as good!

A few more beers, and I’d probly do ya. So give me a minute darling, and then I’ll give you one!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie. wave2


Ok here we go. happydance


Not sure where, and I don't care because we gotta get outta the is place, if it's the last thing we ever do. razz


It's Grammy night, so I've gotta give a nod to some of the great songs of yesteryear. bravo


That's where I'm from. thumbsup


Think I'll kick back and listen to the music now. dance


Have a happy day y'all. wink


joe

Last edited by gymcandy1; 01/28/18 09:05 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1139920
01/29/18 12:13 AM
01/29/18 12:13 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
How were the Grammy's Joe? I stay away from all the awards shows these days, too many political messages.

Have a happy day all! Back to puppy visits!

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1139922
01/29/18 12:27 AM
01/29/18 12:27 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Hope you enjoy the Grammy's, Joe.

Have fun with the puppy visits, Ana. puppy

It's Sunday night, and I'm off to sleep. Back to work in the morning, but luckily, this should be a relatively easy week. Plus, I only have to work Monday through Thursday, which is nice. thumbsup

Have a great Monday, everyone. winter


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1139928
01/29/18 05:16 AM
01/29/18 05:16 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,110
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Ana, venus and everyone. Joe thanks for the funnies! Ana enjoy the puppy time. Venus how nice you have a short work week! Coffee, tea and hot chocolate are ready.
wave Wishing you all a Happy Monday! wave


Gerry
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1139934
01/29/18 08:10 AM
01/29/18 08:10 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,021
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,021
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a wonderful Monday. Danish, Eggs, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, Bacon, and French Toast in the NC. wavegirl


Connie
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1139935
01/29/18 08:20 AM
01/29/18 08:20 AM
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
GBC Offline
Graduate Boomer
GBC  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 18,262
Massachusetts
Morning Boomers joy2

Joe, enjoy whatever the day brings around today.

Ana, have fun with the puppies today.

Venus, enjoy the day. Gerry, thanks for the coffee.

Connie, a wonderful Monday blessing to you.

Just hanging around today. rah


Gail
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1139961
01/29/18 03:23 PM
01/29/18 03:23 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Lovely day here! Bread is on it's first rise. Have had a great morning chatting with family and cleaning up the kitchen wave puppy


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1139974
01/29/18 06:58 PM
01/29/18 06:58 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
Moanday Monday everybody laugh

I'm home from work after shuffling paper, sending electrons, hosting meetings and earning my four quarters for the day!

I'm off to game with wife...but first some gardening and music yes

Have a wonderful evening everyone!

wave2


Dan
...
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music Stay Smart & Stay Safe
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1139990
01/29/18 10:05 PM
01/29/18 10:05 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
It was 82 degrees and dry and lovely today! Awesome weather in January. Spent the day cutting a HUGE Night Bloom Cereus off the TV/Computer cable outside my front window. It was dragging the cable down about 2 feet from under the eaves. I was going to just prop it up or put a rope under it between two eyebolts, but after seeing it and teetering on a ladder 10 feet up, I decided to just chop the heck out of it and get out of Dodge. It's now in a nice pile on the yard and tomorrow I will cut it into smaller pieces and plant each one so I will have mega smaller but awesome plants. Huge blooms about 10-12 inches across and smell awesome at night and horrible in the daytime. Fun stuff.


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1140002
01/30/18 01:10 AM
01/30/18 01:10 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Good night, everyone. sleep


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Previous Thread
Index
Next Thread

Moderated by  BrownEyedTigre 

Who's Online Now
2 registered members (hagatha, curly), 305 guests, and 0 spiders.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Staff, Mod
Newest Members
PierreLombardo, Dux, WillPowerGoat, Ebalon, J7769mon
9388 Registered Users
Powered by UBB.threads™