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Saturdiner #1147469
04/06/18 07:24 PM
04/06/18 07:24 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
I shall allow no man to belittle my soul by making me hate him.

~Booker T. Washington~
``````````````````````

It remains a puzzle why a bra is singular and panties are plural.

````````

"Our restaurant’s snails are world-famous.”

“I know, one of them’s just been serving me.”

```````````

That awkward moment when your entire Math class is discussing whether the result is 15 or 16 and your answer is -1053.

`````````

Proper spelling and grammar is very important and for instance a coma can totally change the meaning of a statement.

Here’s an example:

"Travis is in a rush."
"Travis is in a coma."

````````````

A five-year-old Mikey asks his Grandpa, “Grandpa, what do you call it when there are two people on top of each other in bed?”
-
The Grandpa feels very uncomfortable but decides not to confuse the child and bravely says, “That’s intercourse, my boy.”
-
“OK,” nods Mikey and off he goes.
-
He comes back after five minutes and says, “Grandpa, that’s not right. I’ve just spoken to mom and she said that it’s not called intercourse but a bunk bed!”

`````````

A guy wakes up in the morning and tells his wife: “Wow darling, you won’t believe what happened. I dreamt I was forced to eat a live sheep and now I can’t see my pillow anywhere!”
-
The wife answers, “The pillow’s fine, it’s lying right there on the floor, but I can't seem to find our dog!”

````````

A guy asks his neighbor in an apartment building: “Mr Trepper, you live directly above me and you have the same 2-room apartment as I do. How many rolls of wallpaper did you buy when you moved in?

“We got 18 rolls,” answers the neighbor.

Two months later the guy meets his neighbor again and says, “It’s really funny – I put the wallpaper on everywhere and I still had 10 rolls left over.”

Neighbor smiles, “Yeah, so did we.“

```````````

The person who thought it’s a good idea to put the light switch outside of the bathroom clearly didn’t have any siblings.

```````

That awkward moment when your girlfriend says she’s not hungry but ends up eating half of your food after you've just ordered for yourself.

```````

My teacher asked me to characterize myself in 5 words.

“Quite lazy.”

````````

A police officer stops a car and says: “Congratulations, sir! You are the 1,000,000th car to drive over this bridge – you win $10,000! What will you do with that money?”

The driver gets very emotional and says, “First of all, I’ll finally get my driver’s license!” The wife cuts in, “Don’t listen to him, officer, he’s still drunk!”

A hard-of-hearing granny from the back seat grumbles, “I knew we shouldn’t have taken the stolen car!”

A voice from the trunk adds, “Hey, are we past the border now?”

``````````

I played our wedding video backwards yesterday. It really cheered me up to see how I take the ring off my wife’s finger, get out of the church and go drinking with my best friends.

``````````

Driving a sports car and sticking to the speed limit is like going to McDonalds’ and having just the salad.

``````````

A woman looking for a relationship places an ad, saying, “Looking for a guy that won’t beat me, won’t run away on me and will satisfy me nicely. Am good looking, excellent cook.”

Three days later, there’s a loud knocking at her door. Behind it there’s a guy with no arms and no legs, smiling expectantly. “Dear Amy,” he says, “I have no arms so I couldn’t even beat you if I tried. I have no legs and I can’t run away on you. I’m your guy.”

“That’s very nice,” says Amy, surprised, “but how will you be able to satisfy me?”

His smile widens, “You did hear the knocking, didn’t you?”

````````````

Police officer: “Sir, I don’t understand. You lost the credit card a year ago, why are you reporting it now?”
Guy: “The thief wasn’t spending nearly as much as my wife used to…”
Police officer: “But why report it now?”
Guy: “I think the thief’s wife got hold of it now.”

`````````

Good morning everyboomie, and welcome to the weekend! yay


We did get storms last night, and a fair amount of rain. woot


After having my breakfast, and coffee I went to Walmart, and came back home and got ready to go out to the sod farm. happydance


It was pretty wet and muddy there, and two little pups that were with me really enjoyed running around through it. lab


I did a lot of walking, and some digging, and only found pieces.


After close to three hours of walking around it started to rain.......hard. shocked


We had to walk like a quarter mile back to my truck because I had to park closer to the road because of the mud. slapforehead


The dogs didn't like that at all. The water was almost deep enough for them to swim through. lol


We were all soaking wet.


The dogs dried off on the way back home, but I had to peal off a lot of wet clothes just as soon as I got home. blush


Saturday is going to be like 20 degrees cooler than Friday, and Sunday too. I'll probably try and go back out there Tuesday.


Yep.


Have a happy day everyone.


joe


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1] #1147481
04/06/18 09:28 PM
04/06/18 09:28 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
Hey Joe...welcome to the weekend; enjoy the time off and dry out a little. Good hunting to you on Tuesday as it looks like it'll be a sunny day for you

Ana...I get one day, Saturday, off from work this week...it's a short weekend...back to work Sunday through Friday and then back to a more normal work week.

Venus...just a one day weekend but that's OK as it doesn't happen too often...enjoy the The Walking Dead Season 4 game

Hi Gerry...I'll have a cuppa breakfast tea this morning to go today; I'm off to do recycles, get the van serviced, groceries and other projects

Connie...hope Rookie's and the VFW were fun last night. I'll be back later for a plate of eggs, bacon and grits in the NC

L4L hearts

woot the weekend is here...yes, a short one but it's still the weekend and that's what counts. Normal chores and some projects to keep me busy. Can you believe we already have the first week of April behind us? Whoa!

Have a great weekend everyone wave


Dan
...
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music Stay Smart & Stay Safe
Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1] #1147490
04/06/18 11:35 PM
04/06/18 11:35 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Joe, sounds like an adventure! THose are the times you just have to sit and laugh. lol The good news is, maybe the rain unearthed some points for you.

soot, I'm sorry you have a short weekend. I can't wait to sleep in. I need a day off so badly!

Have a happy day all!

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1] #1147498
04/07/18 12:33 AM
04/07/18 12:33 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Joe, at least you had an entertaining day. grin Hope the dogs are happy to be home now.

Sorry you only have a one day weekend, soot, but it's good that it doesn't happen too often. Enjoy your day off. thumbsup

Enjoy sleeping in, and enjoy your day off, Ana! woot

Sorta, have you played The Walking Dead (Telltale) games? They're really good, especially the first one. smile

It's Friday night, and I'm off to sleep. I enjoyed the preview for the game today, though I was hoping there would be more footage. Oh, well, maybe next time. smile No voice lesson tomorrow, so it's going to be a gaming day for me. happydance I'm still working on Pillars of the Earth, which is fantastic.

Have a terrific Saturday, everyone. spring


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1] #1147509
04/07/18 05:44 AM
04/07/18 05:44 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, soot, Ana, venus and everyone. Joe maybe the rain will expose more points like Ana said! Soot enjoy your day off. Ana hope you get to relax and get some rest this weekend. Venus have fun gaming. Coffee and tea are ready.
spring Wishing you all a Happy Day! spring


Gerry
Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1] #1147519
04/07/18 08:25 AM
04/07/18 08:25 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Super Saturday. Danish, Eggs, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, Bacon, and French Toast in the NC. spring


Connie
Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1] #1147532
04/07/18 10:34 AM
04/07/18 10:34 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Super Saturday ya'll puppy

Rainy, drippy, icky outside. Saw a scroll across the tv screen about Freeze warnings tonight. Too funny because at this moment I'm in shorts with the windows open. Had to run the AC all night. Must be a huge drop coming.

Soot is out running errands. Son and boys are watching a movie which I'm trying very hard not to hear.

Joe, your trip to the farm sounds like quite an adventure. Sorry you didn't find anything whole, but at least you made great memories.

Soot kissy

Ana, hope you got that sleep you were looking for.

Happy gaming, Venus.

Gerry wavegirl

Connie, thanks for the hashbrowns. Color me happy wave


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1] #1147547
04/07/18 12:24 PM
04/07/18 12:24 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Sorta Blonde Offline
BAAG Specialist
Sorta Blonde  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 9,848
San Diego, CA
Happy Saturday to all.

Nope, venus, haven't played any of the Walking Dead Games yet. Too busy with all my other games. I must have about 400 unplayed games I got from Big Fish. Yikes. I may never finish them all and have to leave them to someone in my Will. haha


WARNING! This person is extremely blonde...please type SLOWLY.
Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1] #1147568
04/07/18 04:43 PM
04/07/18 04:43 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
O.K. I'm back and ready for lunch...I'll have a plate of eggs, bacon and grits in the NC please

Hey Sorta...have a great Saturday wave


Dan
...
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music Stay Smart & Stay Safe
Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1] #1147610
04/07/18 11:37 PM
04/07/18 11:37 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,268
In the Naughty Corner
Nighty night all.

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1] #1147627
04/08/18 02:05 AM
04/08/18 02:05 AM
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 2,226
Washington In the Wet corner
Drmojo Offline
Addicted Boomer
Drmojo  Offline
Addicted Boomer

Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 2,226
Washington In the Wet corner
hI YA bOOMERS HAVE A GREAT DAY wave2


kAREN puppy


"Horses are smart"

"You never heard of a Horse going broke"
betting on Humans~ Will Rogers~
Re: Saturdiner [Re: gymcandy1] #1147633
04/08/18 03:16 AM
04/08/18 03:16 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
BAAG Specialist
venus  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,379
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Good night, everyone. sleep


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
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