Few things in the world are more powerful than a positive push. A smile. A world of optimism and hope. A 'you can do it' when things are tough.
~Richard M. DeVos~
``````````````````
I decided to make my password "incorrect" because if I type it in wrong, my computer will remind me, "Your password is incorrect."
```````
Does anyone remember the Swatch, a watch made in Switzerland? Thank god Croatia didn't come up with the idea first. Just imagine if someone were to ask you what time is it? "Not sure, let me check my crotch."
````````
What does an air conditioner have in common with a computer? They both lose efficiency as soon as you open windows.
``````
Q: How can you tell if a blonde used a computer?
A: There's Wite-Out all over the screen.
`````
Q: What did the spider do on the computer?
A: Made a website!
`````
Me: Siri, where is the best place to hide a body?
Siri: The second page of a Google search.
``````
Q: Why shouldn't Facebook have paid $1 billion dollars for Instagram?
A: They could've downloaded it for free!
`````
A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."
``````
Q: Why was six scared of seven?
A: Because seven "ate" nine.
`````
Q: Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?
A: Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.
``````
Instead of "the John," I call my toilet "the Jim." That way it sounds better when I say I go to the Jim first thing every morning.
``````
A lady comes home from her doctor's appointment grinning from ear to ear. Her husband asks, "Why are you so happy?" The wife says, "The doctor told me that for a forty-five year old woman, I have the breasts of a eighteen year old." "Oh yeah?" quipped her husband, "What did he say about your forty-five year old ass?" She said, "Your name never came up in the conversation."
``````
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it?
A: Envelope.
````````
Q: How do you count cows?
A: With a cowculator.
`````
Good morning everyboomie.
It is now the day after the day that comes after Tuesday.
One day closer to that magical end of the week when we all come home and go "Ahhhhhh".
Well, I just wake up and go "Ahhhh".
I actually did exactly that this very morning. I got up and opened the door and looked outside and saw it was raining, and I said to myself not "Ahhhh", but "
Awwww shucks, it's raining and I can't go dog walking."
Well the rain didn't last all that long, and we got our walk in anyway, plus my trip to Wally World. After that I took Beau home, and came back here, put up the groceries, and then cleaned the inside of my truck from all the mud that the dogs tracked in it.
Now I'm all for goofing off and doing absolutely nothing, but today I just couldn't find the time for it.
Ahhhhh well.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
acebook
witter
