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Happy Hump Day #1169805
11/20/18 07:29 PM
11/20/18 07:29 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 32,521
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Sonic Boomer
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 32,521
Calera, Oklahoma
A quick word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said ”no”.
-
~Woody Allen~
`````````````


Good Clean Jokes | Part 4



Best first:

Little Johnny: Odd. First my parents teach me to walk and talk, and then they want me to sit down and shut up all the time.

````

Mother: Eat your bread.

Child: I don’t like bread. Why do I have to eat the bread.

Mother: So you become big and strong.

Child: Why do I have to become big and strong?

Mother: So you can provide the daily bread to your family.

Child: But I don’t like bread!

````

A guy calls the fire department and yells excitedly: “You have to come, now, there’s a fire!”

“OK sir, but please tell us how do we get to you.”

The man asks, puzzled: “What, you don’t have them big red trucks anymore?”

````

Life Hack:

If you’re tired of waiting at a restaurant, just call their number and ask if they also deliver to table 16.

````

That moment when you’ve changed your answer in an exam in the very last second and later you realize the original answer was correct.

````

Why didn’t the dinosaur cross the road?

Because there weren't even any roads during the Jurassic Period!

````

Hello doctor, can you look at my laptop?
-
Why?
-
I think it's caught a virus.

````

Paul to Jane: Would you like to be my girlfriend?

Jane: That’s a bit direct. Can’t you come up with something more beautiful?

Paul: I tried, but they said no.

````

The local minister sees that every morning, some apples on his tree are missing. He makes a sign:

God sees everything.

The next morning, somebody writes under it: Yes, but he’s not a snitch.

````

Q: How many times could old Noah go fishing?

A: Twice. He only had 2 worms.

````

What did one candle say to the other?
-
A: I'll be going out tonight.

````

Financially I‘m set for life. Provided I die next Wednesday.

````

An old guy in his Volvo is driving home from work when his wife rings him on his cell phone.

"Honey," she says in a worried voice, "please be careful. There was a bit on the news just now, some lunatic is driving the wrong way down the highway."

"Oh it's worse than that," he replies, "there are hundreds of them!"

````

How did the barber win the race?
-
He took a short cut.

````

Good morning everyboomie. wave2


Welcome to Wednesday. welcome


I just got back from the weather station. They said we had a really nice day today. bravo


I thought so. razz


This whole week is nice. Thursday we'll be mostly sunny and 61 degrees. turkey


I always have to check the weather before I come here to post. duh


Besides having something to talk about, I figured I should let everyone here know exactly what to expect in case you decide to come down here and visit me in the next few days. thumbsup


I could even post my daily dining menu if you want. wink


Let me know, and have a happy where you are.......if you're not coming here. urock


joe

Last edited by gymcandy1; 11/20/18 07:52 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1169814
11/20/18 11:44 PM
11/20/18 11:44 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 76,824
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 76,824
In the Naughty Corner
Joe, I'd be in heaven with your temps! November has been winter for us. We are so far below normal temps its ridiculous!

Long but short day. lol My visits are spread out so will run errands in between.

Have a happy day all!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1169818
11/21/18 01:23 AM
11/21/18 01:23 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,375
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
Staff Reviewer
venus  Offline
Staff Reviewer
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,375
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Enjoy the nice weather, Joe. thumbsup

Hope you have a great long/short day, Ana. lol

It's Tuesday night here. I have another day off tomorrow. woot I still haven't decided whether I'll do my remaining projects on Thursday or Friday. I'll probably decide at the last minute on Thursday morning. lol

Have a great Wednesday, everyone. fall

Last edited by venus; 11/21/18 01:24 AM.

Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1169825
11/21/18 05:53 AM
11/21/18 05:53 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 23,473
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
True Blue Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
True Blue Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 23,473
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Ana, venus, Taintedfury and everyone. Joe sounds like a perfect weather day for your Thanksgiving! We are expecting record breaking cold! Ana hope you day wooshes by! Venus enjoy your day off! Taintedfury you have a great day too! Coffee and tea are ready.
turkey summer Wishing everyone a warm sunny day! summer turkey


Gerry
Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1169833
11/21/18 08:00 AM
11/21/18 08:00 AM
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 714
SEYMOUR VICTORIA, MELBOURNE AU...
Taintedfury Offline
Settled Boomer
Taintedfury  Offline
Settled Boomer

Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 714
SEYMOUR VICTORIA, MELBOURNE AU...
Good Morning Joe sherlock i'm glad you're having wonderful weather summer ,Ana wavegirl try to stay warm - i'm throwing you a hot chocolate your way shiver ,venus grab a blanket on your day off and have a hot chocolate watching a great movie.. catrub , Kakis' Sister cat thanks and wishing you a terrific day. hamster

Happy gaming too all Boomers.. urock



Last edited by Taintedfury; 11/21/18 08:01 AM.
Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1169834
11/21/18 08:03 AM
11/21/18 08:03 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 10,831
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Adept Boomer
connie  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 10,831
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, Have a Lovely Hump Day. Shopping at Walmart with a friend today. Queen of Hearts at the Eagles tonight. Danish, Eggs, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, Bacon, and French Toast in the NC. turkey summer


Connie
Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1169850
11/21/18 11:08 AM
11/21/18 11:08 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 47,945
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Moderator
looney4labs  Offline
Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 47,945
Alabama
Wonderful Wednesday ya'll puppy

It's a beautiful day in AL. We are eating our meal today, so I'll be doing the turkey, frosting the cake, mashing some potatoes, and drowning a few mushrooms in butter a little later. Casseroles are made, but need to be cooked, so will do the oven dance later. Have a great day ya'll wavegirl


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1169852
11/21/18 11:23 AM
11/21/18 11:23 AM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 29,103
Usually in an Alabama Tree
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 29,103
Usually in an Alabama Tree
Oh my Joe...your daily menu would be a study in itself think

Ana...Best wishes on your next three days and today's long short day wink

Venus...happy day off!! My vote is for Friday Venus...why do Thursday what you can put off to Friday

woot Thanks for having coffee ready Gerry laugh

Hey Ho Connie...I'll have some grits in the NC with coffee.

Whoa shocked look who beat me to the diner ... it's L4L hearts

TaintedFury ... I see the weather is turning rainy for you...rain is good in my book as a drought preventer and then the sun comes out and dries it all out

Have a great day everyone...turkey dinner this afternoon happydance

wave2


To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music
Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1169911
11/22/18 01:25 AM
11/22/18 01:25 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,375
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
Staff Reviewer
venus  Offline
Staff Reviewer
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,375
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Good night, everyone. sleep


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1] #1169916
11/22/18 02:46 AM
11/22/18 02:46 AM
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 714
SEYMOUR VICTORIA, MELBOURNE AU...
Taintedfury Offline
Settled Boomer
Taintedfury  Offline
Settled Boomer

Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 714
SEYMOUR VICTORIA, MELBOURNE AU...
Good morning Soot - yep your right about the weather.... once the rain stops it doesn't take for the sun too come out and the ground goes hard..but the farmer's are really feeling the struggle..Enjoy your turkey meal. turkey wave2

Connie have a wonderful day and enjoy your turkey & cake too. thanksgiving


Looney have a great time out with your friend & tonight at the Eagles.. hug woot


wavegirl penguin

Last edited by Taintedfury; 11/22/18 02:49 AM.
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