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Tuesday Joe's #1170343
11/26/18 08:28 PM
11/26/18 08:28 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 32,520
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Sonic Boomer
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 32,520
Calera, Oklahoma
“I’m glad I don’t have to hunt for my food, I don’t even know where Sandwiches live.”

~Bill Murray~
````````````


What do you call an alligator who knows his way around?
-
A navigator.

````

Do you know what makes me smile?
-
My facial muscles.

````

A dung beetle goes into a bar and asks, "Yo, is this stool taken?"

````

My mom loves gardening. She was so excited that spring finally arrived, she wet her plants.

````

Little Johnny complains to mom at home, “Mom, our teacher really doesn’t know anything. He keeps asking us!”

````

Johnny, how did your school report turn out? asks mother. "Come on mom, the most important thing is that I’m healthy!“

````

Little Johnny walks a cow through the village square.
-
The mayor sees him and asks, “Hey Johnny, where are you going with the cow?”
-
“I’m taking her to the bulls so she would get pregnant,” answers Johnny.
-
The mayor is shocked, “Surely your father had better be doing that?”
-
Little Johnny thinks about it for a bit and shakes his head, “Nah, I think it’s really best left with the bulls.”

````

Teacher: "Why are you praying in class little Johnny?”
-
Little Johnny: “My mom taught me to always pray before going to sleep."

````

– Little Johnny, why does your little sister cry?

– Because I helped her.

– But that is a good thing! What did you help her with?

– I helped her eat her gummy bears.

````

“So what have you been doing at school today, Johnny?”
-
“I don’t really want to talk about it mom. You’ll see it later on the news, anyways.”

````

Little Johnny asks the teacher, “Mrs Roberts, can I be punished for something I haven’t done?”
-
Mrs Roberts is shocked, “Of course not, Johnny, that would be very unfair!”
-
Little Johnny is relieved, “OK Mrs Roberts, sorry, I haven’t done my homework.”

````

Little Johnny asks his mum, “Mum, do all fairy tales begin with ‘Once upon a time in a faraway land’?”
-
“No darling,” says his mother, somewhat distressed, “Sometimes, they can begin with ‘I’ve got too much work in the office tonight, I’ll be home later’.”

````

Little Johnny comes home and tells his daddy, “Dad, tomorrow there’s a special ‘Adults’ evening’ at school.
-
Daddy is surprised, “Really? Special?”
-
“Yes,” nods Johnny, “it will be just you, the teacher, the headmaster and two police officers.”

````

Teacher tells little Johnny off, “You know very well you can’t sleep in my class, Johnny.”
-
Johnny admits, “Yes, I know miss. But maybe, if you didn’t speak quite so loud, I could.”

````

Good morning everyboomie. wave


Ready for A new day? happydance


Monday was on the cool side for us. We got up in the mid 40s. Very little wind which meant I was ok wearing my shorts. dance


We're to be a little warmer each day, getting back up in the mid 60s, and then the mid 70s by Friday. hamster


I hope those of you who are caught in the big snow can stay toasty and safe. hug


Time to watch some football now. The Texans are about to play the Titans, or, the old Houston team against the new Houston team. taz


Have a happy day everyone. rah


joe



Last edited by gymcandy1; 11/26/18 08:30 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Tuesday Joe's [Re: gymcandy1] #1170356
11/26/18 11:44 PM
11/26/18 11:44 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 76,818
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 76,818
In the Naughty Corner
Good morning, Joe! You are not doing a good job of blowing that warm air here! It will be 15 degrees when I get up tomorrow. lol Trade you?

Have a happy day all!

Ana wave


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Tuesday Joe's [Re: BrownEyedTigre] #1170357
11/27/18 12:27 AM
11/27/18 12:27 AM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 32,520
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Sonic Boomer
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 32,520
Calera, Oklahoma
Hmmmm, I will give your offer great consideration Ana.


joe wink


There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Tuesday Joe's [Re: gymcandy1] #1170359
11/27/18 12:36 AM
11/27/18 12:36 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,371
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
Staff Reviewer
venus  Offline
Staff Reviewer
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,371
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Have a great Tuesday Joe, Ana and all who follow. wave

It's Monday night, and I'll be off to sleep soon. I have one more day off tomorrow, which makes it my "Sunday." grin Time to get some more practice in and maybe a game or two.

Have a great Tuesday, everyone. fall


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Tuesday Joe's [Re: gymcandy1] #1170368
11/27/18 05:31 AM
11/27/18 05:31 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 23,471
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
True Blue Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
True Blue Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 23,471
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Ana, venus and everyone. Joe enjoy your warm weather. Ana bundle up and stay warm! Venus have a great day off! Coffee and tea are ready.
wave Wishing a Happy Day for everyone! wave


Gerry
Re: Tuesday Joe's [Re: gymcandy1] #1170370
11/27/18 07:37 AM
11/27/18 07:37 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 10,826
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Adept Boomer
connie  Offline
Adept Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 10,826
winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, have a Super Tuesday. Dinner and Karaoke at 8-8 Panda tonight. Danish, Eggs, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, Bacon, and French Toast in the NC. happydance12


Connie
Re: Tuesday Joe's [Re: gymcandy1] #1170398
11/27/18 07:54 PM
11/27/18 07:54 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 29,100
Usually in an Alabama Tree
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 29,100
Usually in an Alabama Tree
Tootin Toosday everyone laugh

Whoa...where'd the day go?

Started off with a nice crisp walk with the buddy boys before the sun came up and it was a cool 29 degrees

Got to work and discovered our A/C handler is stuck on and it was a cool 58 degrees

Thank goodness I'm back home where it's warm

Thanks for the coffee this morning Gerry!

Oh my Joe...I think we'll come visit you for some warmer weather

Hope you get a weather break with warmer temps Ana

Hey Venus...how was your day?

Connie, have fun at Panda tonight

TaintedFury...keeping you and dad in my prayers

Have a great evening everyone

L4L flowers

wave2


To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music
Re: Tuesday Joe's [Re: gymcandy1] #1170409
11/27/18 09:21 PM
11/27/18 09:21 PM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 4,082
marietta,georgia
family Offline
Addicted Boomer
family  Offline
Addicted Boomer

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 4,082
marietta,georgia
i was suppose to learn to do paula deen creamed potatoes, but something fell throught.

Re: Tuesday Joe's [Re: gymcandy1] #1170419
11/27/18 11:56 PM
11/27/18 11:56 PM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,371
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
venus Offline
Staff Reviewer
venus  Offline
Staff Reviewer
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 8,371
Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Soot, my day went well, thanks. smile It's back to work for me tomorrow. Hope they fix the air conditioning at your work soon! That can't be fun. eek

Good night, everyone. sleep


Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?
Re: Tuesday Joe's [Re: gymcandy1] #1170421
11/28/18 12:01 AM
11/28/18 12:01 AM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 76,818
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 76,818
In the Naughty Corner
Nighty night...


Don't feed the Trolls
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