My dog licked the crumbs out of my computer keyboard and earned an online college degree.
—@SCbchbum~
```````````
Funny Retirement Quotes 'The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does.' Anonymous
He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which. Douglas Adams
'I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.' Charles Lamb.
'When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch.' R C Sherriff.
'Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.' Will Rogers, Autobiography, 1949
'It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man.' Scott Elledge.
'When one door closes, another one opens, but we often look so long and regretfully at the closed door that we fail to see the one that has opened for us.' Alexander Graham Bell.
'Forever, and forever, farewell, Cassius! If we do meet again, why, we shall smile; If not, why then this parting was well made.' William Shakespeare.
'Few men of action have been able to make a graceful exit at the appropriate time.' Malcolm Muggeridge
'A man is known by the company that keeps him on after retirement age.' Anon
'There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quit...retire!' Groucho Marx
'I've lit the blue touch paper and found there's nowhere to retire to.' Doctor Who
````
More Funny Quotes About Retirement Retirement kills more people than hard work ever did - Malcolm Forbes
The money's no better in retirement but the hours are - Anonymous
Retirement without the love of letters is a living burial - Seneca
I have never liked working. To me a job is an invasion of privacy - Danny McGorty
Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it - Gene Perret
Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did - Robert Benchley
I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. So I do it three or four times a day. - Gene Perret
A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job - Ella Harris
What do gardeners do when they retire? - Bob Monkhouse
````
You Are Probably Retired If....1 You and your teeth don't sleep together.
2 You try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks and discover you aren't wearing any.
3 It takes two tries to get up from the couch.
4 Your idea of a night out is sitting on the patio.
5 You step off a curb and look down one more time to make sure the street is still there.
6 Getting "lucky" means you remember where you left your car in the car park.
7 Everything hurts, and what doesn't hurt; doesn't work.
8 You sink your teeth into a steak and they stay there.
9 You wonder how you could be over the hill when you don't even remember being on top of it.
10 You have more hair in your ears and nose than on your head.
````
Funny Retirement Sayings (Also Suitable for Appraisals)
1 He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.
2 She got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.
3 His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.
4 This man is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
5 This man has delusions of adequacy.
6 Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; buy she only gargles.
7 When he opens his mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever foot was previously in there.
````
Retirement Question and Answer SessionQuestion: How many retirees to change a light bulb?
Answer: Only one, but it might take all day.
Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
Answer: Tied shoes.
Question: How many days in a week?
Answer: Six Saturdays, One Sunday
Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.
````
Good morning everyboomie.
I can't believe I'm posting for Sunday already.
Did you know there are only 2 days in the weekend?
No worries, I read somewhere that retirees have 6 Saturdays and one Sunday. I wish I could remember where I saw that.
I went to the creek this afternoon. I didn't walk the whole area that I normally walk, but I didn't find anything where I did look.
I'll probably go back tomorrow and look some more.
Missy is over spending the night with Beau. It's the first time since I got her that she has been away from me over night.
I MISS HER SO MUCH!!!! 
My friend said she whined for a while, and then she lay down and went to sleep.
I will be a lonely night. Pepper is not much of a snuggle buddy.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
acebook
witter
Hope you're staying warm inside!
I've barely had any time to game so far, but I'm hoping to get some time tomorrow evening. So that will keep me busy for the rest of the day. 
just think of when you see again there be a lot of kisses from her enjoy you day.. 
super breakfast to you happy gaming. 
keep warm and safe enjoy your day. 
have a snuggle warm fun day.