-1. Why dont blind people skydive?
Because it scares the daylights out of their ----.
2. I saw a wino eating grapes.
I told him, you g---a w--t. first word is not proper English.
-3. A guy goes into a lawyer’s office and asks the lawyer: “Excuse me, how much do you charge?”
The lawyer responds: “I charge $1,000 to answer three questions.”
“Holy Molly – That’s a bit expensive isn’t it?”
“Yes. What’s your t---- question?”
-4. How did the slow person die ice fishing?
He/She was hit by the z------.
-5. What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
Same m----- n---.
-6. I couldn’t believe that the highway department called my dad a thief.
But when I got home, all the s---s were there.
-7. My grandfather died peacefully, in his sleep…
…not s-------g like the passengers in his car.
-8. What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between you and me, something s----s.
-9. Cole’s Law: Thinly Sliced C-----e
-10. This is my step ladder. I never knew my r--- l-----.