One time, a guy handed me a
picture and said, “Here’s a picture
of me when I was younger.” Every picture of you is when you were younger.
~Comedian Mitch Hedberg~
````````````````````````````````````````
Funny HeadlinesArea Man Joins Organization Where Nothing Much Ever Happens
—Source: Wall Street Journal
````
Angry Nepali Man Bites Cobra to Death in Revenge Attack
—Source: MSNBC
````
Alton Attorney Accidentally Sues Himself
—Source: (Madison County, Illinois) Record
````
A Fat, Mustachioed Orphan Finds a Home
—Source: New York Times
````
Pasco Man Arrested, Says 48 Beers Was Likely Ten Too Many
—Source: St. Petersburg Times
````
Writing newspaper copy is an art form unseen in these real headlines:
“Worker Suffers Leg Pain After Crane Drops 800-Pound Ball on His Head”
“City Unsure Why the Sewer Smells”
“Caskets Found as Workers Demolish Mausoleum”
“Statistics Show That Teen Pregnancy Drops Off Significantly After Age 25”
“Homicide Victims Rarely Talk to Police”
“Hospitals Resort to Hiring Doctors”
````
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge
—Source: Timothy Haas in Boseman Daily Chronicle
````
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
—Source: Timothy Haas in Boseman Daily Chronicle
````
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
—Source: Timothy Haas in Boseman Daily Chronicle
````
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
—Source: Timothy Haas in Boseman Daily Chronicle
````
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendants
—Source: Timothy Haas in Boseman Daily Chronicle
````
Miners Refuse to Work After Death
—Source: Timothy Haas in Boseman Daily Chronicle
````
Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
—Source: Timothy Haas in Boseman Daily Chronicle
````
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
—Source: Timothy Haas in Boseman Daily Chronicle
````
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
—Source: Timothy Haas in Boseman Daily Chronicle
````
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
—Source: Timothy Haas in Boseman Daily Chronicle
````
Good morning everyboomie.
Hump Day already?
Such a momentous day of the week.
Not much going on in my neck of the woods. I had a boring Tuesday, and I expect Wednesday will be much the same.
Whatever you all have going today I hope it's good.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe