I don’t want to brag, but I do speak pig Latin; I mean, I’m not fluent, but I’m sure if I ever went there, I could get by.
~Bonnie McFarlane~
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14 History Jokes Only History Buffs Will UnderstandWhy was WWI so quick?
Because they were Russian.
Why was WW2 so slow?
Because they were Stalin.
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A Roman walks into a bar. He holds up two fingers and says, “Five beers, please!”
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I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency—even if I’m in a Cabinet meeting. —Ronald Reagan
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A Frenchman walks into a library and asks for a book on warfare. The librarian replies, “You’ll only lose it.”
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What did Richard III say when a planning proposal was submitted for building parking lot?
“Over my dead body”
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Fidel Castro visits Moscow and is taken on a tour by Leonid Brezhnev. First, they go for a drink, and Castro praises the beer. “Yes, it was provided by our good friends from Czechoslovakia,” says Brezhnev. Next, they go for a ride in a car, and Castro admires the car. “Yes, these cars are provided by our good friends from Czechoslovakia.”
They drive to an exhibition of beautiful cut glass, which Castro greatly admires. “Yes, this glass is provided by our good friends from Czechoslovakia.”
“They must be very good friends,” says Castro. “Yes,” says Brezhnev,” they must
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Why did Karl Marx dislike Early Grey tea?
Because proper tea is theft.
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Why were the early days of history called the Dark Ages?
Because there were so many knights
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In my many years, I have come to the conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. —President John Adams
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Why did George Washington have trouble sleeping?
Because he couldn’t lie.
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What yearbook superlative was Robert E. Lee given at graduation?
Most likely to secede.
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How did Louis XIV feel after completing the Palace of Versailles?
Baroque.
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Teacher: Can you describe for me Napoleon’s origin?
Student: ‘Course I can!
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A man from the Soviet Union obtains a permit to move to the USA, and his new neighbor asks how he much he likes his new apartment, so he asks him what his apartment was like back in Russia.
“Oh, my old apartment was perfect. I could not complain.”
So his neighbor then asks him what his job was like back home.
“Oh, my old job was perfect. I could not complain.”
So the neighbor asks him what the food was like back in the USSR.
“Oh, the food was perfect. I could not complain.”
Puzzled, the neighbor finally asks him, if everything was so great in the Soviet Union, why did he move?
The man says, “Here I can complain.”
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Good morning everyboomie.
I know It says Joe's Monday up there, but if anybody's interested I'd let it go for a song.....really.
You could edit the content to your liking. Just don't ask me to explain any of those history jokes, please.
We had a very warm (some would say hot), windy Sunday. Sun day was a real good name for it. Lot's of sun.
I took Missy parking, and then made a run to Walmart, and then somewhere in there, after it was already too hot, I went out and did some more tree trimming.
Need to finish that like asap. The city is having it's 'trash off' this week, and everything was supposed to be at the curb (like we have curbs
) by Saturday......ie... yesterday.
I don't like much more work having it done.
Have a great day everyone.
Oh yeah L4L we used to sit and listen to the old women on our block have a long-winded conversations on the party line. It really ticked me off when I wanted to call my friend, and they would not shut up.
Ana I can totally understand pushing off from the wall with your feet to get the mower going. I didn't have much weight at all to put behind the mower,and if the blades were not very sharp, and the grass was thick, it was pure hell to push it.
joe