I asked my dad for a BB gun, but he said we were a tribe of worriers, not warriors.
-~Hilary Price~
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When you’re young you think your dad is Superman. Then you grow up and you realize he’s just a regular guy who wears a cape.
- Dave Attell
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The greatest advantage mothers have over fathers, is knowing which children really belong to them.
- Ham on Wry @HeyZeus666
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My dad, 86 years old and he’s still working. God bless him. He’s a pimp, and he’s out there every night.
- Jonathan Katz
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I never knew what to get my father for his birthday. I gave him $100 and said, “Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.” So he bought a present for my mother.
- Rita Rudner
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My dad’s hearing is gone, and his mind is slowly following. He called me up the other night, very excited. He said, “Jonathan, when I get up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, I don’t have to turn on the light; the light goes on automatically. When I’m done, the light goes off automatically.”
I said, “Dad, you’re peeing in the fridge, and it’s got to stop.”
- Jonathan Katz
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All fathers are intimidating because they’re fathers. Once a man has children, his attitude is, “To hell with the world. I can make my own people. I’ll eat whatever I want. I’ll wear whatever I want. And I’ll create whoever I want.”
Jerry Seinfeld
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My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.
- Spike Milligan
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A Father is one whose daughter marries a man who is vastly her inferior, but then gives birth to unbelievably brilliant grandchildren.
- Anonymous
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One day my boys will wise up and realize they get to stay up playing video games only as long as I'm winning.
- Aristotles @AristotlesNZ
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A father carries pictures where his money used to be.
- Anonymous
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A female magician made her boyfriend vanish. How?
By asking for a commitment.
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You can tell a girl likes you if she stares at your phone instead of her own.
- Kelkulus @Kelkulus
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Bad news: I wasted four years responding to personal ads without ever getting a call back. Good news: I finally know what “obituary” means.
- Guy Endore-Kaiser
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When you’re wondering whether she’s his daughter or his girlfriend, she’s his girlfriend.
- Pamela Druckerman
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There is someone out there for everyone. Unfortunately, statistically speaking, based on the numbers, yours is probably in India or China.
- Ruminations.com
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What men don’t realize is how many women date just so they won’t have to cook dinner.
- Melanie White
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Good morning everyboomie.
If it's Wednesday, this must be the humpy lumpy Hump Day Diner.
This is going to be a busy morning at least for me. I have to go stock up on groceries. The question is, do I hit Lowe's first to find another project, or do I just hit Walmart and run?
I would love to have a nuther project to keep me busy for a nuther day or two.
I went to the sod farm again today. It was cloudy, breezy, and cooler. Not a bad day at all. The humidity disappeared too.
I didn't find a single arrowhead. I found the tip of one, and it would have been a killer. That's always the case when you find a part of a point.
I did find about six scrapers though, and a drill.
I also stuck my hand right into a fire ant bed when I was digging around, and not paying attention. The right hand didn't know what the left hand was doing.
I only got 2 or 3 serious bites.
Have a happy day everyone.
joe
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Wishing you all a Great Hump Day! 
