Top 100 Movies Quotes.......one at a time.
"I'm king of the world."
What movie?
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More Funny Quotes About Retirement
Retirement kills more people than hard work ever did - Malcolm Forbes
The money's no better in retirement but the hours are - Anonymous
Retirement without the love of letters is a living burial - Seneca
I have never liked working. To me a job is an invasion of privacy - Danny McGorty
Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it - Gene Perret
Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did - Robert Benchley
I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. So I do it three or four times a day. - Gene Perret
A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job - Ella Harris
What do gardeners do when they retire? - Bob Monkhouse
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One day a police panda car pulled up to Granny's home and Grampy got out. The constable explained that this elderly gentlemen had said he was lost in the Victoria park.
'Why, Ivor, 'said Granny, 'You've been going there for over 30 years! How on earth could you say you had got lost?'
Leaning close to Granny so the police officer couldn't hear, he whispered, 'Wasn't exactly lost. I was just too tired to walk home.'
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Funny Senior Texting Moments
Senior Texting Codes
Now that we oldies can text, here are some helpful texting ideas. Young people have their acronyms, now seniors have their own texting codes: Old Fogies - Health and Safety
* ATD - At the Doctor's
* BFF - Best Friend's Funeral
* BTW - Bring the Wheelchair
* BYOT - Bring Your Own Teeth
* DWI - Driving While Incontinent
* FWIW - Forgot Where I Was
* FYI - Found Your Insulin
* LOL - Living on Lipitor
* ROFL...CGU - Rolling on the Floor Laughing...Can't get Up!
* TOT - Texting on Toilet
* WWNO - Walker Wheels Need Oil
*GGLKI (Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking in!)
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Visiting Doctor Ross last month Paula, a long retired schoolteacher, explained in some detail her problems while he listened very patiently.
'Now, Paula,' said Doctor Ross, 'you say you have shooting pains in your neck, aching knees, frequent dizzy spells, and constant nausea. Just for the record, how old are you?'
'Ah, yes,' Paula spoke brightly, 'I'll be 49 on my next birthday.'
'Really?' commented the doctor quietly, 'I see you have slight memory loss, too.'
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Yes, I am a Senior Citizen
I'm the life of the party - even if it lasts until 8 pm.
I'm very good at opening childproof caps - with a hammer.
I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where I am going.
I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a thing you're saying.
I'm very good at telling stories; over and over and over and over..............
I'm not really grouchy, I just don't like traffic, waiting, crowds, lawyers, loud music, unruly kids, barking dogs, politicians and a few other things I can't seem to remember right now.
I'm wrinkled, saggy, lumpy, and that's just my left leg.
I'm sure they are making adults much younger these days, and when did they let kids become policemen?
And, how can my kids be older than I feel sometimes?
I'm wondering, if you're only as old as you feel, how could I be alive at 150?
I'm a walking storeroom of facts - I've just lost the key to the storeroom door.
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Good morning everyboomie.
As a new week gets under way, and in the way of next weekend, let's talk about Sunday.
My Sunday was spent eating, gaming, watching football, eating some more, gaming, and probably some more eating before it's all over.
I am the walrus, goo goo goo joob
Well, a fat penguin anyway.
Looks like Monday will be Walmart day again. Gotta stock up on a few things.
I wish you all a super happy Monday, and a fantastic new week.
joe
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