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Monday's #1199896
10/20/19 07:19 PM
10/20/19 07:19 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
gymcandy1 Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
gymcandy1  Offline OP
Joe's Diner Proprietor
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 33,073
Calera, Oklahoma
“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words but to live by them.” – John F. Kennedy
~~~~~~~~~

I can still remember my Grandpa's last words before he kicked the bucket.

He said, "Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"
~~

What do you call a dog with no legs?

It doesn't matter what you call him, he's not coming.
~~

What has four fingers and a thumb and looks human?

A severed hand.
~~

What do you call a man with a shovel in his head?

An ambulance, due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.
~~

What's green and has wheels?

Grass. I lied about the wheels.
~~

What did one Japanese man say to the other?

I've no idea, I don't speak Japanese.
~~

Why are people like drums?

Hit them with a stick and they make a noise.
~~

Take your age and add five years to it...

That's your age in five years.
~~

What do you call a deer with no eyes?

A deer. The absence of eyes doesn't change the species.
~~

What did the muffin say to the tin can?

Nothing, muffins can't talk.
~~

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?

Robin, get in the car.
~~

Why are hamsters like cigarettes?

They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.
~~

What starts with "e", ends with "e" and only has one letter in it?

e.
~~

You know what's really odd?

Numbers that aren't divisible by two.
~~

Why did the turtle cross the road?

He didn't. There was a lot of traffic so he thought better of it.
~~

A visibly tired and stressed guy walks into a bar and orders a beer.

The bartender asks, "Long day?"

"No, all days are 24 hours long," the guy replies, amazed at the bartender's lack of education.
~~

What do you call one hundred rabbits walking backwards?

Anything you like, they can't understand you.
~~

What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a llama?

An animal abuse lawsuit.
~~

How do you kill a blonde?

Steve proceeds to break down into tears because his Grandmother's Alzheimer's has advanced to the stage where she no longer remembers him.
~~

What would Santa Claus be called if he had no hands?

Probably still Santa Claus, however he doesn't exist so it doesn't really matter.
~~

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar.

He's treated with great respect because he's such a talented actor.
~~

Good Monday morning everyboomie. wave2


I've been watching football games all afternoon, and now it's time for the big one. yay


Hopefully not 'the big one' as in heart attack. razz


Hopefully it's not 'The Nightmare Before Halloween'. lol


I hope you all have a happy Monday. rah rah trah


joe

Last edited by gymcandy1; 10/20/19 07:41 PM.

There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1199897
10/20/19 07:27 PM
10/20/19 07:27 PM
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 7,402
marietta,georgia
family Offline
BAAG Specialist
family  Offline
BAAG Specialist

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 7,402
marietta,georgia
watching court shows.

Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1199900
10/20/19 08:27 PM
10/20/19 08:27 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
BrownEyedTigre  Offline
The Sassy Admin and PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 83,270
In the Naughty Corner
Joe, hope your faves win! The Bears got stomped on today!

family, enjoy!

I am back tonight from a five day mountain getaway in North Carolina. I left Tuesday after work. I will figure out how to share photos when I get them sorted. We did some great hikes and saw some amazing waterfalls. Sorry for not posting I was gone, first time I ever left my home unattended and even though I had cameras on, I'm uneasy posting publicly until after the fact. Back to work for me today!


Don't feed the Trolls
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1199907
10/21/19 03:01 AM
10/21/19 03:01 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Kaki's Sister Offline
Sonic Boomer
Kaki's Sister  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 25,109
Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, family, Ana and everyone. Joe did you watch the game? Family enjoy. Ana that was a wise choice. You just never know today. Coffee and tea are ready.

fallEnjoy your Monday everyone! fall


Gerry
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1199921
10/21/19 06:35 AM
10/21/19 06:35 AM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
connie Offline
Graduate Boomer
connie  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 16,020
winter springs fl.
Good morning, have a Great Monday. Danish, Eggs, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, Bacon, and French Toast in the NC. witch


Connie
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1199931
10/21/19 09:51 AM
10/21/19 09:51 AM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
soot  Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 37,661
Alabama
The Cowboys did good yesterday Joe woot

Enjoy your shows Family

Welcome back Ana ... can't wait to see your photos

Coffee smells wonderful Gerry

Connie, I'll have a bacon sandwich in the NC

Have a great day everyone ... off to work

hearts L4L

wave2


Dan
...
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music Stay Smart & Stay Safe
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1199939
10/21/19 02:52 PM
10/21/19 02:52 PM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Space Quest Fan Offline
Graduate Boomer
Space Quest Fan  Offline
Graduate Boomer

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 16,783
Upper Arlington, Ohio
Good afternoon Boomers.


It's nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice.
Re: Monday's [Re: gymcandy1] #1199940
10/21/19 04:09 PM
10/21/19 04:09 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
looney4labs Offline
Sonic Boomer
looney4labs  Offline
Sonic Boomer

Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 48,905
Alabama
Ana, so glad you had fun!

Hope everyone is having a wonderful day wavegirl


"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
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