GB HOMEPAGE

Monday Joe's

Posted By: gymcandy1

Monday Joe's - 11/26/18 02:19 AM

In those days the best painkiller was ice; it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it.
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~George Burns~
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Best Dad Jokes



“Did you get a new haircut dad?” “No, I had them all cut, son.”

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Son: "Is this insecticide good for mosquitos?"

Dad: "Not at all, it kills them!"

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“I’ll call you later!”
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“Please don’t do that. I’ve always asked you to call me Dad!”

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“Are you alright dad?”'

“Actually, technically, I’m half left and half right.”

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"Hey dad how was your weekend?" - "Light, dark, light, dark, Monday."

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Dad to his son: "I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and dumb.

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"Daughter to her dad: "What is it?"
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Dad: “It” is a pronoun.

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You: “So, dad, I was thinking…”

Dad: “Ohhhhh and I wondered what that high-pitched grinding sound was!”

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Dad: Would you like to hear a construction joke?

[Yes]

Dad: Well I’m still working on it.

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"We drove past a city cemetery and my dad remarked, “Do you know why I can’t be buried here, boy?”

“Why?”

“Because I’m still alive.”

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Dad: I have a very secure job. There’s nobody else who would want it.

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Dad, I’m hungry!”

“Oh hello Hungry, I’m Dad!”

“But I’m really hungry!”

“And I’m really Dad.”

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Daughter: “How do I look, daddy?!”

Dad: “With your eyes, sweetheart.”

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Dad, I’m cold!

Go to the corner, son, there’s 90 degrees.

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When somebody asks my dad how he feels, he always replies, „With my hands.“

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Stop whining, you will never be the man your mother is.

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Father: Do you know the joke from the 3rd floor?
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Son: “No,”
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Father: Me neither, I was on the 2nd floor at the time.

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Good morning everyboomie. hamster


Even for a Monday. taz


I woke up Sunday morning.


That was the high light. snicker


We were about 20 degrees colder than Saturday. Still not bad though. It's just that the wind was blowing 25mph. eek


Poor Missy just kind of tumbled along beside me when we went out walking. lol


The leaves drive her crazy. She tries to dodge every one of them. puppy


She barks at them, "LEAF ME ALONE!!" razz


Have a happy day everyone. wink


joe

Posted By: BrownEyedTigre

Re: Monday Joe's - 11/26/18 03:53 AM

Quick fly-by. We are in a blizzard and we have lost power on and off the last hour. My neighbors tree just fell on his house and truck from the weight of the snow. Have a happy day all!
Posted By: soot

Re: Monday Joe's - 11/26/18 04:33 AM

Joe, we had a pup who loved to chase blowing leaves...he was a cutie pie! I see the weather is turning chilly for you...maybe a warm period will come again think

Oh my goodness Ana...stay warm and out from under trees!!!!! eek

Gerry, can I get a tall dark roast please? laugh

Happy Moanday Monday everyone...it's back to work.

Catch you later Connie, Venus and SortaB

Hope all is going well for your dad TaintedFury wave2

Posted By: venus

Re: Monday Joe's - 11/26/18 07:25 AM

Glad Missy had fun chasing leaves, Joe. puppy

Ana, that's terrible, I hope your neighbor and his house are okay! eek Hope you're staying safe in the blizzard! shiver

Soot, well, Broadway singers have to sing laying down all the time, depending on the scenes they're acting out. grin Sure, I could do it, but it's not my preference. lol Sorry you have to go back to work. Hope it goes well and/or flies by.

It's Sunday night here. Tomorrow, Thorsgoats and I are meeting my mom for lunch and a movie. thumbsup We're going to see Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindlewald.

Have a great Monday, everyone. fall
Posted By: Kaki's Sister

Re: Monday Joe's - 11/26/18 11:05 AM

Good Morning Joe, Ana, soot, venus, and everyone. Joe sounds like you and the pups had a fun time! Ana how scary! I hope your power stabilizes and your neighbor's family is okay! Soot always have that tall dark roast ready for you! Enjoy! Venus enjoy your lunch and movie with your mom today. Coffee and tea are ready.
happydance12 Wishing everyone a Happy Monday! happydance12
Posted By: connie

Re: Monday Joe's - 11/26/18 01:26 PM

Good morning everyone, have a Super Monday. Ana, stay safe. Working the kitchen for Bingo at the Eagles today. Danish, Eggs, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, Bacon, and French Toast in the NC. happydance12
Posted By: looney4labs

Re: Monday Joe's - 11/26/18 04:52 PM

Magnificent Monday ya'll puppy

Hope you all have a wonderful day!

Ana, try to stay warm. We will be thinking of you.

Hugs all around.

Joe, loved the jokes this morning "light, dark, light, dark" rotfl
Posted By: venus

Re: Monday Joe's - 11/27/18 05:33 AM

Good night, everyone. sleep
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