'Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.' Will Rogers, Autobiography, 1949.
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I January I am starting to draw SS, and go to part time at work.
It seems appropriate to post a few retardment quips.``````````````````````````````
1) Retirement is the only thing that will make you realize how you wasted all these years trying to be mature when you can get back to being a child at the end of it all. Happy retirement.
2) Old age, fragile bones, doctor visits, medical checkups and a weak bladder – are you still looking forward to retirement? Congratulations.
3) The funny thing about retirement is that it makes you realize the importance of medical insurance.
4) Do you think that life after retirement is an adventure? Well, it is if you count trekking out of bed, climbing atop sofas and diving into takeaways. Have fun.
5) After retirement the body grows older, the heart grows fonder and the mind becomes younger.
All the best at trying to handle an old body with a young mind and fond heart.
6) Remember all those things that you wanted to do in your life, but didn’t because you never had the time?
Don’t plan on doing them after your retirement either – you will either be too old or too poor to afford them now.
7) Retirement is like a lifelong vacation, except that you are no longer fit to do most of the fun stuff.
Congratulations.
8) Thank God retirement is mandatory and not an option.
Otherwise I would be stuck with an annoying colleague like you. Happy retirement.
9) Retirement is the beginning of joyous moments in which you can sit back and give advice to others, even though you never followed it in your own life.
10) Congratulations for gaining two new best friends upon your retirement.
Their names are Bed and Couch. You will be hanging out with them a lot.
11) Retirement is like a never-ending weekend party except that you can’t drink, can’t hook up and can’t stay up all night even if you want to… so in short it is boring. Congratulations.
12) All your life you sacrificed your health so you could earn more money to retire happily. Now you’ll realize that you’ll be spending all the money to keep up your health. Congratulations.
13) Retirement is just a nice word to say that you are getting too old to work.
Congratulations for stepping into this league, old timer.
14) For someone as lazy as you, retirement will make no difference in your life except the fact that you can now do nothing… officially. Congratulations.
15) Most people spend their whole lives planning their retirement but when they actually retire, they don’t know what to do. Don’t let this happen to you. Happy retirement.
Humorous retirement wish about turning old and weak
16) Retirement is life’s way of telling you that you are too old and too weak to work any longer. Congratulations.
17) Congratulations on your retirement but don’t get too eager to relax yet. Get ready to tire yourself out with grandkids, gardening and many other chores.
18) No matter how many college degrees, skill development courses and professional accreditations you have received, there is one more qualification you will still receive after your retirement – Master of Doing Nothing. Congratulations.
19) Reaching retirement age is like getting to the top of a cliff. You will be at the zenith of your career, well knowing that the next step is a downward plunge. Happy retirement.
20) Some people say that retirement signifies the end of all of life’s tension… but that’s true only if you have a grand pension.
21) Retirement is just a nice way for the company to tell you that they have found more energetic, talented, youthful and skilled staff than you. Happy retirement.
22) Congratulations for your retirement. Now you will be forced to work on a never-ending project that will take up all your time and it’s called – Doing Nothing.
23) Doing the things you always wanted to do is not the real challenge of retirement. Remembering them is the real challenge. Good luck at being a forgetful pensioner.
24) Until now, when you slacked at work your boss shouted at you. Now when you slack at household chores, your wife will shout at you.
25) Was working hard all your life worth it? You are about to realize that now.
26) You always cursed your body when you were ill which made you miss an important deadline at work.
27) All these years you argued with your colleagues, juniors, managers and your boss at work. After retirement, you will argue with your grandkids, children and wife at home. Life remains the same…
28) Retirement is when you will finally curse yourself for using an important deadline at work as an excuse for not taking care of your body all these years.
29) Consider yourself officially and truly retired on the day you don’t feel like changing your underwear. Happy retirement.
30) Retirement is the turning point in your life which makes you realize that you had your priorities messed up all this while. Congratulations, better late than never.
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Good morning again everyboomie.
If it's Tuesday, it must be grocery shopping day, and house cleanig day, and laundry day, and yard work day.
Why did I ever complain about Mondays??
I really have to blame that on my procrastinating ways.
I put off everything until my days off, and when I have two days off the first one is strictly a play day.
If I have one day off, the fist one is a play day.
Play always comes first. I may not even be around tomorrow.
Play first, work later, if I can't put it off till even later.
Heck I'd put off typing out 'procrastination' if I could.
For a two-fingered pecker like me that's almost like work.
Almost....
Ok, have a bodascious day everyone.
joe