-1.I get no respect: I remember the time a was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father.
He said he wanted m--- p----.
-2.A bum came over to me and told me he hadn’t had a bite in 10 days, so I b-- h--.
-3.I came from a real tough neighbourhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he
wasn’t a professional, the knife had b----- on it.
-4.I went to see my psychiatrist the other day and told him that I was talking to myself.
He replied, “That’s all right. Just hold a c--- p---- by your mouth.
-5.I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I k--- the h----.
6.I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a t--s--r and a r---o.
-7.To cease smoking is the easiest thing. I ought to know. I've done it a t------- t----.
-8.Love is grand; divorce is a h------ g----.
-9.Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the 'Y' becomes s-----.
-10.Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and s--------.