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#1169805 - 11/20/18 06:29 PM Happy Hump Day
gymcandy1 Online   happy
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/24/05
Posts: 32458
Loc: Calera, Oklahoma
A quick word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said ”no”.
-
~Woody Allen~
`````````````


Good Clean Jokes | Part 4



Best first:

Little Johnny: Odd. First my parents teach me to walk and talk, and then they want me to sit down and shut up all the time.

````

Mother: Eat your bread.

Child: I don’t like bread. Why do I have to eat the bread.

Mother: So you become big and strong.

Child: Why do I have to become big and strong?

Mother: So you can provide the daily bread to your family.

Child: But I don’t like bread!

````

A guy calls the fire department and yells excitedly: “You have to come, now, there’s a fire!”

“OK sir, but please tell us how do we get to you.”

The man asks, puzzled: “What, you don’t have them big red trucks anymore?”

````

Life Hack:

If you’re tired of waiting at a restaurant, just call their number and ask if they also deliver to table 16.

````

That moment when you’ve changed your answer in an exam in the very last second and later you realize the original answer was correct.

````

Why didn’t the dinosaur cross the road?

Because there weren't even any roads during the Jurassic Period!

````

Hello doctor, can you look at my laptop?
-
Why?
-
I think it's caught a virus.

````

Paul to Jane: Would you like to be my girlfriend?

Jane: That’s a bit direct. Can’t you come up with something more beautiful?

Paul: I tried, but they said no.

````

The local minister sees that every morning, some apples on his tree are missing. He makes a sign:

God sees everything.

The next morning, somebody writes under it: Yes, but he’s not a snitch.

````

Q: How many times could old Noah go fishing?

A: Twice. He only had 2 worms.

````

What did one candle say to the other?
-
A: I'll be going out tonight.

````

Financially I‘m set for life. Provided I die next Wednesday.

````

An old guy in his Volvo is driving home from work when his wife rings him on his cell phone.

"Honey," she says in a worried voice, "please be careful. There was a bit on the news just now, some lunatic is driving the wrong way down the highway."

"Oh it's worse than that," he replies, "there are hundreds of them!"

````

How did the barber win the race?
-
He took a short cut.

````

Good morning everyboomie. wave2


Welcome to Wednesday. welcome


I just got back from the weather station. They said we had a really nice day today. bravo


I thought so. razz


This whole week is nice. Thursday we'll be mostly sunny and 61 degrees. turkey


I always have to check the weather before I come here to post. duh


Besides having something to talk about, I figured I should let everyone here know exactly what to expect in case you decide to come down here and visit me in the next few days. thumbsup


I could even post my daily dining menu if you want. wink


Let me know, and have a happy where you are.......if you're not coming here. urock


joe


Edited by gymcandy1 (11/20/18 06:52 PM)
_________________________
There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

William Butler Yeats

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#1169814 - 11/20/18 10:44 PM Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
BrownEyedTigre Offline
The Sassy Administrator PR Liaison
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 76546
Loc: In the Naughty Corner
Joe, I'd be in heaven with your temps! November has been winter for us. We are so far below normal temps its ridiculous!

Long but short day. lol My visits are spread out so will run errands in between.

Have a happy day all!
_________________________
Don't feed the Trolls

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#1169818 - 11/21/18 12:23 AM Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
venus Offline
Staff Reviewer
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 03/07/09
Posts: 8273
Loc: Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Enjoy the nice weather, Joe. thumbsup

Hope you have a great long/short day, Ana. lol

It's Tuesday night here. I have another day off tomorrow. woot I still haven't decided whether I'll do my remaining projects on Thursday or Friday. I'll probably decide at the last minute on Thursday morning. lol

Have a great Wednesday, everyone. fall


Edited by venus (11/21/18 12:24 AM)
_________________________
Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?

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#1169825 - 11/21/18 04:53 AM Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
Kaki's Sister Offline
True Blue Boomer

Registered: 11/21/04
Posts: 23340
Loc: Marlborough USA
Good Morning Joe, Ana, venus, Taintedfury and everyone. Joe sounds like a perfect weather day for your Thanksgiving! We are expecting record breaking cold! Ana hope you day wooshes by! Venus enjoy your day off! Taintedfury you have a great day too! Coffee and tea are ready.
turkey summer Wishing everyone a warm sunny day! summer turkey
_________________________
Gerry

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#1169833 - 11/21/18 07:00 AM Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
Taintedfury Offline
Settled Boomer

Registered: 12/31/13
Posts: 599
Loc: MELBOURNE AUSTRALIA
Good Morning Joe sherlock i'm glad you're having wonderful weather summer ,Ana wavegirl try to stay warm - i'm throwing you a hot chocolate your way shiver ,venus grab a blanket on your day off and have a hot chocolate watching a great movie.. catrub , Kakis' Sister cat thanks and wishing you a terrific day. hamster

Happy gaming too all Boomers.. urock




Edited by Taintedfury (11/21/18 07:01 AM)

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#1169834 - 11/21/18 07:03 AM Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
connie Offline
Adept Boomer

Registered: 07/12/02
Posts: 10662
Loc: winter springs fl.
Good morning everyone, Have a Lovely Hump Day. Shopping at Walmart with a friend today. Queen of Hearts at the Eagles tonight. Danish, Eggs, Grits, Hash Browns, BB Pancakes, Bacon, and French Toast in the NC. turkey summer
_________________________
Connie

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#1169850 - 11/21/18 10:08 AM Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
looney4labs Online   content
Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/05/04
Posts: 47869
Loc: Alabama
Wonderful Wednesday ya'll puppy

It's a beautiful day in AL. We are eating our meal today, so I'll be doing the turkey, frosting the cake, mashing some potatoes, and drowning a few mushrooms in butter a little later. Casseroles are made, but need to be cooked, so will do the oven dance later. Have a great day ya'll wavegirl
_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras

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#1169852 - 11/21/18 10:23 AM Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
soot Offline
Puzzled Moderator
Sonic Boomer

Registered: 04/16/05
Posts: 28803
Loc: Usually up an Alabama Tree
Oh my Joe...your daily menu would be a study in itself think

Ana...Best wishes on your next three days and today's long short day wink

Venus...happy day off!! My vote is for Friday Venus...why do Thursday what you can put off to Friday

woot Thanks for having coffee ready Gerry laugh

Hey Ho Connie...I'll have some grits in the NC with coffee.

Whoa shocked look who beat me to the diner ... it's L4L hearts

TaintedFury ... I see the weather is turning rainy for you...rain is good in my book as a drought preventer and then the sun comes out and dries it all out

Have a great day everyone...turkey dinner this afternoon happydance

wave2
_________________________
To learn, read...To know, write...To master, teach...To live, play games & listen to whale music

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#1169911 - 11/22/18 12:25 AM Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
venus Offline
Staff Reviewer
BAAG Specialist

Registered: 03/07/09
Posts: 8273
Loc: Arcadia (twin world of Stark)
Good night, everyone. sleep
_________________________
Interrogator: [True or false?] All mangoes are golden. Nothing golden is cheap. Conclusion - all mangoes are cheap.

Helena: Where are these mangoes?

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#1169916 - 11/22/18 01:46 AM Re: Happy Hump Day [Re: gymcandy1]
Taintedfury Offline
Settled Boomer

Registered: 12/31/13
Posts: 599
Loc: MELBOURNE AUSTRALIA
Good morning Soot - yep your right about the weather.... once the rain stops it doesn't take for the sun too come out and the ground goes hard..but the farmer's are really feeling the struggle..Enjoy your turkey meal. turkey wave2

Connie have a wonderful day and enjoy your turkey & cake too. thanksgiving


Looney have a great time out with your friend & tonight at the Eagles.. hug woot


wavegirl penguin


Edited by Taintedfury (11/22/18 01:49 AM)

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