The only thing I really wanted for Father's Day was the thing that made me a father in the first place. Life is hard.
- Andry H'Tims @Thing_Finder
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I asked my dad to help me with a math problem. He said: “Don’t worry; this is a piece of cake.” I said: “No, it’s a math problem.”
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Being a great father is like shaving. No matter how good you shaved today, you have to do it again tomorrow.
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Dad: You’ll never amount to anything because you procrastinate.
Son: Oh yeah? Just you wait!
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Dad Wisdom: I know what I’m getting for Father’s Day. Last night my daughter asked me what size aftershave I wear.
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Dad: Hi, Sweetie, how was school today?
Daughter: You can read all about it on my Facebook, Dad!
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Dear Dad, $chool i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply can’t think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you. Love, Your $on
Dear Son, I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh. Love, Dad
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Dad Wisdom: Why, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?
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Science teacher: When is the boiling point reached?
Science student: When my father sees my report card!
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Dad: I wouldn’t buy anything with velcro, it’s a total rip-off.
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Dad: Let me see your report card.
Son: I don’t have it.
Dad: Why not?
Son: My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.
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“While having their evening dinner together, a little girl looked up at her father and asked, “Daddy, you’re the boss in our family, right?” The father was very pleased to hear it and confidently replied, “Yes, my little princess.” The girl then continued, “That’s because mommy put you in charge, right?”
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I asked my dad for his best dad joke and he said, “You.”
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Dad: How old is your father?
Child: As old as me.
Dad: How it is that possible?
Child: He became a father only when I was born.
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My son wants 50% of my Father’s Day gifts. He says if it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t even be a father.
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Son: Dad, I’m hungry.
Dad: Hello, Hungry, I’m Dad.
Son: Dad, I’m serious.
Dad: I thought you were Hungry?
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You can tell it’s almost Father’s Day. The kids suddenly want to stop at all the garage sales.
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Good morning everyboomie.
Well, it has taken thousands of years but today finally arrived.
I wonder what they'll say about this day when the look back on it hundreds of years from now and say 'on this date,,,,,'
I don't suppose anybody will note that I mowed my lawn.
I'm sure I'll look back on it ever so fondly.
That's about it, but that was about enough for me.
I'm ready for the weekend now.
How about you?
Have a happy day everyone.
joe