>wet the rain cheque

With what?

>just [beep] on it

Yikes! All right then, as long as you do it yourself.
The rain cheque is now wet and smells like Pepé.

>shake the rattle

Nothing happens.

>rattle the rattle

You hear something approaching in the distance. It doesn't sound like motor bikes, more like people breathing heavily. Minutes later the Full Metal Throttle group appears, pushing their bikes.

"what's the matter guys?"

"It's those darned fuel prices, they have gone up so fast we can't afford it any more! We would gladly bring you to Glinda but first we need gas for our bikes."

Pepé steps forward and says he might be able to help when he gets the appropriate food.

That could be an idea but you fear for the health of you and your companions!

>use knife with boa

The boa is now cut into small feathers.

>use feathers with butter

After greasing the feathers you mold them into nose plugs and hand them out to the friends. Everyone is protected now.

>give beans to Pepé

Pepé eats the beans and after a while you hear some concerning noises coming from his bowels. Pepé runs to the bikes and fills the tanks with gas. Even his face is starting to turn green!

>all aboard!

Everybody gets onto the bikes and the gang drives through the woods towards Glinda's house. The Peepers drop dead from the trees. It's good you fabricated the nose plugs!

Finally the house of Glinda is reached, the band says farewell and leaves. With much caution you remove one nose plug, there's still a smell but it's not dangerous any more. The house is surrounded by a fence with a gate in it. The gate is ajar and after opening it you all walk into the garden. It looks like a big playground for children. Michael and the witch kids start hunting for candies that appear out of nowhere.
The house looks like it comes from a fairy tale, seemingly it's built from all kinds of sweets. After knocking on the door a crackling voice says:

"Who is there at my door and who are those people eating my candy?"

>


Bernard

The Prince of Shapier draws your attention to the fact that the house seems to be raised on chicken legs. He whispers an explanation that Glinda may be another incarnation of Babi Yaga. You urgently call everyone to your side, well away from the hut, once they are all clear....

>hut of brown now sit down

The house settles comfortably on the ground, not unlike a chicken settling on her eggs (thank all the powers that you had the foresight to call everyone away - hey, maybe you are begining to get the hang of this "hero" stuff)

The Prince (call me Ant) says "Let me go in first. If she is who I think she is, I've had dealings with her more than once before". All three kids pipe up at once, each trying to shout down the others to explain why each one has very good credentials for dealing with Glinda/Babi Yaga/(or anyone else she either is or isn't).

"Hang on" you say "Graham gave me Cedric to advise us, let's ask him" You speak to Cedric who says "Twit Twoo" (Humph, you now see why Graham was so prepared to give away his supposedly wise owl).

>-

>
At that, you now look at Ant with a puzzled expression & ask "what are you doing here?". We left you with Graham & his family back at The Ducks Head."

"Oh" he replies "you don't mind do you?, it's just that Graham fired me soon after you left, so I followed you on my carpet thinking that I might be of some help to you"

"Glad to have you aboard Ant" you say "but please leave the thinking to me". Just at that moment you become aware of The Retainer vibrating in your pocket. You subtly reach in to feel a note, take it & withdraw your hand from your pocket.
>Look at note. You read the note covertly before it dissolves.

Following it's instructions you say "Mia, Mal & Cassie, would you do the honors". While they are distracted as they turn to approach Glinda's door you quickly place the Axtec-like statue, Retainer & the 2 pages from the Latin-English dictionary into the now empty but very greasy handbag. On asking Cedric to take it & hide it somewhere safe, he promptly takes the handle in his beak & carries it up into the midst of a very leafy tree.

Meanwhile Glinda has opened the door to see the three children standing there.

>

Baba Yaga, the old tales say, is an old, decrepit hag with a face that can melt railroad spikes and eyes as big and rough as millstones.

The woman at the door is definitely not Baba Yaga.

She examines the three in front of her with an air of determined calm, and then says stiffly,

"Occasus."

"Glinda." Cassie's response is equally cool. You're not sure if they're estranged friends or reconciled enemies, but rather than get in their way you decide to observe them for a moment.

Glinda is tall, commanding, and beautiful. Her dress is strangely regal, and her ears, like most witches, are pointed.

It takes a few more seconds before you recognize her.

"Now wait just a minute!" you shout, tumbling briskly forward. "I know you! You're that woman who stole my gold credit card!"

Glinda peers at you over the bridge of her nose, as if deciding whether you would be better swatted or shooed.

"Really, Occasus," she tuts, "is this the sort of company you keep nowadays?"

You puff yourself to your full height--still at least a foot shorter than Glinda--and try to assert yourself.

"I'll have you know that was a very mean trick you pulled on me," you scold, "and I wish to have my card back now."

Glinda laughs.

"Any ownership you might have claimed was lost the moment you threw the thing down a well, adventurer. Moreover, you should be more careful what you lay claim to in my domain. That card was registered to one Oscar Zoroaster Phadrig Isaac Norman Henkle Emmanuel Ambroise Diggs." She looks at you speculatively, "Are you, in fact, he? Or she?"

"I....er. I'm not sure?" It occurs to you, rather belatedly, that you have no idea what your name is. It's a thought you find slightly disturbing.

"Oh, how wonderful!" Glinda bestows on you a cloying smile that only a child could love. "An amnesiac! I should have guessed!" She frowns slightly. "I'll be keeping this card, however. I know Oscar, and he'll be happy to have this back... if anyone ever finds him again."

"That...sounds fair..." You trail off nervously.

Glinda grins persuasively.

"Trust me traveler, I was doing you a kindness. You have no idea the sort of annual...fees they charge for a magical golden credit card." Brushing you aside, she glances at the rest of your companions, loosely clustered near the gate. "You brought friends, I see. I suppose they think I stole their brains or their courage or some such?"

You shake your head. "Not exactly."

"Ah, well then! Clearly you've come for entertainment! And I, indeed, am in a mood to entertain. Though I am afraid there will not be any musical accompaniment." She looks momentarily disappointed. "My last group of minstrels had an unfortunate...accident."

Cassie looks at her curiously. "Glinda, you know witches never meet merely to fraternize. We're here on business. We don't have much time."

"Of course not! Which is precisely why we all need to sit down for a lovely cup of tea. I insist!" Though the offer is polite, it is clearly not an invitation so much as a command. Before long, Glinda has shepherded you and your companions into a cozy room by a blazing fire, where you arrange yourselves around a small circular table set with an arrangement of delicious smelling jasmine tea and a large plate of crumpets.

Cassie looks unsettled. "This all looks lovely," she frets, "but we really do need to discuss things with you."

Glinda stirs her tea with her finger and glares intently.

"Don't meddle in the affairs of witches older than yourself, Occasus. You're liable to get your fingers burned." Her tea, you note, is boiling.

Drink tea.

You all sip your jasmine tea. The fire crackles in front of you, and a log falls deep into the ashes. You feel warm, then drained, then terribly sad.

"Ashes, ashes, we all fall down," says Mia, wiping away a tear.

Pepe groans. "I am a cartoon skunk," he whispers. "And all my love affairs are with females who despise me."

"My father was a giant Ant!" says Prince Antony. "Who am I trying to fool? I'm not even really human."

"Any officer on my bridge would make a better Captain than me," says Dirk mournfully. "I can't improvise, sing or dance, much less lead."

Cassie leaps to her feet, overturning her chair. "Glinda's put a depressing reality potion in the tea!" she shouts. "Somebody do something -- anything -- quick!"

>_

Nearly everyone by now is blubbering, they stop to look at Cassie for a second after her outburst, then carry on. All except for Maleficus & Nero Beambar.

Beambar all of a sudden thumps the table so hard that everything on it jumps & spills to make a dishevelled mess, pushes his chair away & stands up. Everyone goes quiet including Glinda.

"My friends!" he bellows "Snap out of it! The reality of what you are should not make you lose hope. Look at me! I've been the scourge of Gillikan County for 2,000 years without meaning to be, all because I had a disorder that no-one understood.

In all that time people kept away from me & I didn't have 1 single friend & now I have 9 thanks to you good people." Tears now start to well up in his eyes but he continues

"You Pepe may be a cartoon skunk but your foul 'emissions' have got us out of a few scrapes & we couldn't have got by without your special talent.

Cassie, the same blood runs through your veins as the person who cured me, your sister Mia. I can never thank either of you enough for that.

Ant, does it matter that you are not human, you are a Hero blessed with fine physical attributes & have an impressive list of achievements.

You Dirk, as Captain you don't need to improvise, sing or dance or lead. You have a good crew each with their own field of expertise to guide you. They expect you to pass the buck, glean their thoughts & steal their ideas as your own & are probably grateful that you are a very, very nice man.

Michael, you have had many successful years in a kind & humane field, & Lord O'Scars I know that you are the best train driver ever.

And, if it wasn't for you" Beambar continues turning to face you "I would still be living a lonely life in my Mansion scaring everyone witless everytime I went out shopping".

Beambar sits down again, as does Cassie. Everyone has cheered up again & Glinda looks suitably impressed. "Well, you really are a motley crew aren't you" she says "you're obviously not spies, so what brings you here & what do you want from me?"

>

After a long moment of silence, everyone is looking at everyone. Some smiles slowly appear on the faces. They all are convinced now their lives are not so bad after all. Being afraid they will all all burst out in song and dance soon, you ask Glinda to follow you outside. Glinda nods and the both of you go to the garden.

>tell Glinda about silver slippers

She starts to look worried as you are telling her about the Whizzer and what has happened so far. "That's not good A.G., that's not good at all. A man with silver slippers can get very confused, especially when he's home alone. He could even become a criminal of fashion. You have to go to his house and retrieve those shoes. I can help you, there's a secret entrance into his palace but it's not easy to get there. Ant should be able to bring you there with his flying carpet. Don't go with the whole group, 3 people is the maximum or you will be detected by the alarm system. You have to pick who will accompany you and you have to pick wisely."

After a while you decide to take Dirk and Lamia with you.
"A wise choice apprentice. Dirk can help you locate the slippers with the help of his ship and crew, Lamia is know to tempt man into things they would not do normally."

>go inside and ask Ant, Dirk and Mia to follow you outside

Ant is willing to take you to the secret entrance, Glinda instructs him how to get there. Dirk is also immediately willing to go with you, he still needs new uniforms for his crew. Mia is a bit more hesitant, she doesn't want to leave her siblings behind but the thought of obtaining the slippers makes her to agree too.

Glinda comes toward you and hands you a silver shoehorn, decorated with a red ruby. "Take this, it might come in handy in more than the obvious ways."
Ant blows his whistle and the flying carpet lands on the grass. Dirk, Mia and you sit down on it. Ant mumbles some words in a strange language and of you go.
"How long will it take before we'll get there?" you ask Ant.
"If we don't get stuck in a traffic jam we should be there in about 30 minutes." he replies. It's a nice day and you you are enjoying the ride. Suddenly the carpet dives down in a steep angle towards a little cave in the mountain side. Ant stps the carpet and the three of you step into the cave entrance. Ant waves goodbye and flies off.

>enter cave

You expected the cave to be very dark but in fact there's a beautiful light inside it. Hundreds of fireberries illuminate the walls. You see a crescent shaped stone.

>take stone

As you pick up the stone you feel it's emitting a warm and soothing feeling.

>


Bernard

Just at that point your thoughts are interrupted by a loud bleeping noise. Dirk reaches into his pocket & pulls out his communicator but just as you hear O'Hairy say 'Captain, we....' Dirk excuses himself & steps outside of the cave.

EARLIER ON THE BENTBUTFLISE:
Sometime after Sock's mysterious disappearance an enormous purple object slowly materialises onto one of the circular travel zones in the transporter room. Spotty, while watching in amazement, quicky presses the alarm. A warning siren whirrs into life & a voice echoes around the ship 'RED ALERT, unidentified entity beaming up.

O'Hairy & Tickov quickly leave their posts & race to the transporter room to join Spotty.

The purple object now starts to exhibit a lot of small movements causing it to keep changing shape, & the 3 officers with lightning speed whip out their phazers & train them on the mass.

All of a sudden a muffled voice emanating from within it is heard shouting "Don't shoot! Just get me out of here!"

Officer Sock?

After easing their weapons & putting them away Spotty knocks the alarm off. They all run over to the mass to find a pile of heavy duty silk taffeta. They start rummaging through it to help find & extricate Sock.

Finally he emerges beaming from ear-to-ear & gesturing towards the theatre curtains asks "Well! What do you think of using this to make new uniforms?" "It's certainly beautiful fabric" O'Hairy replies fondling it lovingly "& I love the color, but how?"

All of a sudden there is an incoming call alert. Sock says "I'll go" & swiftly makes his way to the bridge, presses the communication button on O'Hairy's work station & answers "Yes, Captain".

Meanwhile Spotty, O'Hairy & Tickov decide to take a break & make their way over to the refreshment area for coffee.

Later when they return to the bridge, Sock is pacing back & forth with a face as black as thunder muttering "MR SACK!, POINTY EARS!, obnoxious child, aren't they bred with manners these days."

"About the new uniforms?" O'Hairy says in an effort to distract Sock from his mood.

Sock immediately cheers up forgetting his converstion with Mia, switches on his PC & starts a casual game he downloaded from Big Wish called Uniform Shop Hop. "Look" he says excitedly "all we need is 4 machines like the ones in this game! Should be a piece of cake for you to make them Spotty!"

Spotty plays through 1 level, makes a few notes & disappears off to the engine room. For the next few hours the sound of banging, welding & drilling is heard throughout the ship.

At the 1st sound of silence Tickov & O'Hairy immediately rush to the engine room just as Sock is placing a huge stack of cut up pieces of the curtain onto a table next to a pile of the curtain tassels.

"Who wants to be 1st?" Spotty inquires. O'Hairy volunteers & steps onto Machine 1: The Analyzer.

While standing there Sock enthusiastically feeds a piece of fabric into Machine 2: The Patternizer & another into Machine 3: The Bootizer, both start to whirr, rattle & shake & spit out some items a minute later.

Sock proceeds to feed these into into Machine 4: The Tasselizer & hands the resulting entire uniform with matching boots & hats trimmed with tassels to O'Hairy, still standing on The Analyzer, who becomes instantly dressed in it.

"Wow" say Tickov, Spotty & Sock in unison.

O'Hairy steps off the analyzer & struts proudly back to the bridge to let the Captain know that the quest for uniforms is over.

Dirk answers "I see" he says. "but I need some time before I beam up. My friends down here need my help & may need some help from the Bentbutflise first".

"We await your instructions Captain" O'Hairy says before ending the transmission.

Dirk joins you & Mia in the cave again & ponders the stone in your hand.

>

>follow the cave path

As you stroll down the path inside the cave, you notice the light starts to dim. You look around and see there are less and less fireberries growing the further you go. Afraid as you are of the dark, you pick some fireberries, just in case! That's not a success, after a short time the fireberries stop to glow. This could become a major problem!

>ask Dirk for advice

Dirk contacts his ship and asks Mr. Sock how far it is until the end of the caves. Sock answers he will do a ground penetrating scan of the area and he will contact Dirk as soon as he knows something.
The cave widens and there's the sound of water streaming. There's a river here. In the semi darkness it's impossible to see how deep the river is, you can just see the other side. There are some stepping stones in the river, they seem to move up and down.
It could be very dangerous to pass this stream.
Your cellphone starts to buzz. "Wait a minute, I don't have a cellphone, what the heck!?"
Realizing that it's not a cellphone you take the stone you found earlier out of your pocket. It's glowing greenish and it's vibrating a little.

>use stone with stepping stones

At the moment you put the crescent shaped stone onto the first stepping stone, the earth starts to tremble. The stepping stones rise and the moon stone starts to grow. Seconds later the moon stone turned into a crescent shaped bridge and the stepping stones into pillars supporting it.

>cross the bridge

You carefully cross the bridge feeling a bit uneasy. The saying "What goes up must come down." is racing through your mind. You arrive at the other side of the stream and so do your two companions. The heart beat starts to normalize again. The bridge disintegrates, only the moon stone is left.

>take moon stone

Walking along the caves are narrowing again and it's getting darker with each step you take. This could go wrong in a very bad way.
There's the voice of Sock, "Captain, we pinpointed your location, you're almost at the end of the caverns. It's approximately 10.3145 steps in the direction you're going, then you turn 74.666 degrees to your left and you should be able to see the exit."
With a bit more confidence you follow the way and after turning left you see a faint glow indeed.
There's an iron bridge here. You wonder who could have built it.
There's another stone lying on the ground. It has the shape of the sun.

>pick up the sun stone

You get the stone, it's warm and it emits an uplifting feeling.

>cross iron bridge

Crossing the iron bridge your footsteps are resonating in the metal construction. You hope there's no one around who will hear it. At the end of the bridge there's a large gate, it is closed.
The sun disappears behind the horizon and it's getting really dark now. The best thing to do is take a break and get some sleep.

The next morning you are awakened by the rattling of chains, the gate opens! A young dude comes out of the palace. He's carrying some sort of long rope on his shoulders. The gate closes behind him. He walks to the middle of the bridge and ties one end of the rope to the railing. The other end he ties to his ankles. He empties his pockets and climbs the railing. After looking down a long time he jumps down. He bounces up and down because of the elastic cord. You wonder how he will get up the bridge again being alone there.

>go to middle of bridge and look at belongings

There isn't much you can use, only the thingy that looks like a remote could be useful.

>go back to gate

Dirk and Mia are also wake now. It's time for a little strategy talk. Dirk contacts Sock and asks if they still have a fix on the slippers, Sock confirms and says he can guide you to the place where they are. The main problem now is the gate.

>use remote with gate

It works! The gate opens and you walk into the palace. It looks like you're at the servants wing of the castle. There's only a small vegetable garden here. No fountains can be seen.
Looking around only one door can be seen.

>enter door

After entering the door it now is very obvious you're in the servants quarters. It's a good thing they all are still sleeping, or so it seems. Dr. Sock guides you through the corridors. Suddenly you hear a voice. "I have to go to the bridge. I can not find my son, I think he jumped of the bridge again. Probably that dumb*ss is waiting for someone to pull him back up."

>hide

All three of you hide behind a large vase, someone who looks very irritated marches by. Phew, that was close. You better be more aware cruising through the palace! "Sorry captain, it's very strange but these non playing characters don't show up on our scans!" says Sock. You arrive at an elevator, there's button with the text 'Call Lift'. Sock instructs you to go the the third sub level.

>press button

The button lights up and almost immediately the lift doors open. There are many buttons but not one with the text third sub level. Experience has learned you to make the right choice, so you press the button labelled 'Dungeons'. With an incredible speed the elevator starts to descend, so fast your feet hardly touch the floor. Suddenly the lift slows down and you pressed to the floor. It feels like you are three times heavier than usual. A lot of noise and the doors open. Crawling out you hope you have never have to use this horrible contraption again.
There's only one way to go so you follow the path, after some corners you arrive at a moat, there's a drawbridge on the other side. This is something you don't see everyday, an underground moat and drawbridge!

>use remote with drawbridge

Nothing happens. What to do now?

>blow shoehorn

After blowing the shoehorn the drawbridge lowers and it's now possible to cross the moat. you're in a small hall, there's a tiny window in one off the walls and there are stairs leading down. A voice can be heard but it's impossible to hear what is being said.

>look window

Looking through the window you see the Whizzer in lower chamber experimenting with the silver slippers. Not willing to confront the Whizzer directly you look at Dirk and Mia. Mia says "Well I think it's my turn now to help you." She turns around and says a few words you can't understand. It looks like she is growing taller, she turns towards you. Oh goodness, she has changed into a voluptuous 20 year old! "Mia what's this, I thought you were a young girl!" Mia smiles and answers "I'm not a child, I never have been a child. I can change my appearance into any shape that suits me the best. I'm thousands of years old and this is my way to cheat death. You are one of the rare people who know about it now." She walks down the stairs, through the small window you can see how see approaches the Whizzer. As soon as he hears Mia, he turns around. He seems to be completely hypnotized! Mia caresses his face and bows her head slightly. She kisses his neck, or so it seems. She opens her mouth and bites the neck of the Whizzer! Oh dear, she's some kind of vampire! The Whizzer doesn't resist at all, he just smiles in a very grateful way. Finally he falls on the ground, sucked completely dry. Mia whipes her mouth and signals you to come.

>go stairs

After walking down the stairs you're in the Whizzers room. Mia looks very satisfied. Dirk says "Now I've done my duty, it's time for me to leave. Goodbye my friends, I hope you'll live long and prosper, as my friend Sock would say. Spotty beam me up!" A weird sound follows and Dirk disappears in a bad special effect way. You look at Mia. "I have what I wanted now," she says "I'll be on my way now, goodbye brave gamer." She changes into a cloud of black smoke and disappears. You're on your own now!

>take silver slippers and wear them

The slippers have a tight fit so you use the shoehorn. They are a bit too small and your toes are hurting. Now what to do?

>click heels

After clicking your heels a few times you have the feeling you are captured in a tornado. you lose your conscience.

The moment you regain your senses, you hear the sound of screeching tires and the smell of burning rubber. As you open your eyes you see a VW Beetle with the word taxi painted on it a few inches away from you. The driver steps out of his car and starts cursing at you. Then he sees you're completely confused and he helps you to get in the taxi. He drives off.
"Where am I?" you ask. The cabby looks at you and says "Man, are you on drugs or something? You're in Mexico City, where did you come from so suddenly? I almost drove right over you! Be glad I just repaired my brakes." Not knowing what to do you look around a bit. The clock in the car tells it's about 2 o'clock, the road is one big traffic jam. That's strange at this time of day!
You feel a bit light, did you loose some inventory items? You look at your feet, the slippers are gone and so are your socks.You don't feel too bad about the socks, you did wear them days in a row!

>inv

You have 7 item(s)

A crowbar
An Aztec statue
A shoehorn
A knife
A sun stone
A moon stone
An envelope

Hey, where did the envelope come from? On the envelope is written: Kind regards, Glinda.

>open envelope

Inside the envelope are a gold card and a comic book. The comic book tells a story about a group of adventurers in the land of OS.
"why is it so busy on the roads this time of day?"
The driver looks at you and says "There's an old legend that speaks of a solar eclipse that will happen within the next days. It will be the end of times if some ancient rituals will not be performed. Nobody knows what these rituals are any more. All the people you see on the road are driving to their families, to be with them when the end of times is there."

>


Bernard

REM
News item, today's paper: most skunks are born in May.

Poor Pepe, abandoned on his birthday...

END REM

The absurdity of the driver's proclamation is dulled somewhat when you peer out the window. The streets are busy, but the sidewalks are empty. All the stores are closed, and the sky is somehow different, as if you're seeing it through the bottom of a cloudy, half-empty glass. "I don't understand," you say.

"You look but you do not see. You hear, but you do not listen. Look around you. Does nothing look out of place, out of the ordinary?"

You follow the driver's directions and look out the window--carefully this time. But you see nothing more than you did before.

Seeing your confusion in his rear-view mirror, the driver continues, waving his free hand towards the empty streets. "The people are afraid. They fear the coming darkness, and what comes afterwards. This is no local superstition. Nor is this some meaningless prophecy dredged from the mad writings of some ancient fool. You know how prophecies work. Some believe. Some do not. The world goes on."

"This is no prophecy. Everyone knows, deep within their hearts, what will happen here. They know what approaches. They do not fear death. They fear absence. And they are afraid."

You shake your head. "How can that be? What could have convinced them so absolutely?"

"You did. You failed. Worlds collided, and so..."

"Failed? Failed at what?"

The driver laughs ruefully. "Your problem, compadre, is that you have forgotten who you are. You have lost track of your reality."

"What is this?" you ask. "A dream?"

"It is a warning. Come. Let me show you something." The driver shifts into a higher gear, and soon you suspect the car is traveling faster than a Beetle should be capable of. "Just last week," says the driver, "the engine in my car died. I could not bear to see my taxi go, and so I poured my meager earnings into buying a new, better engine. It's powerful, you see, and now...now I shall make use of it."

On the road in front of you, there is a sudden disturbance, and a portal appears miraculously on the road before you. It looks much like the one you saw earlier, only this one does not include a bear or Macbeth. On the other side, dimly, you see another place, dark and grim. Just as the car is about to pass through the portal, you shout to the driver. "Where are we going? Why is this portal here, in the real world?"

The driver laughs again. "Real...imaginary...you think in the wrong terms. You should ask: 'Why is this portal in my world?' The answer is, there are portals everywhere now. This portal is one of the Whizzer's, but in this instance I think he's doing us an inadvertent favor." As he speaks, the car rockets through the portal. There is an instant of utter silence, and then you break through the other side. The driver slows the car to a manageable speed and then stops. He turns off the car, removes the keys from the ignition, opens the door and gets out. "Come," he says, leaning into the taxi. "There is something you must see."

You get out of the car and look behind you, but the portal has vanished. In front and behind, a long, winding dirt road stretches, following the meandering rises and falls of a row of grassy hills. Dusk is falling, (for the second time today, it seems) and long shadows play across a desolate graveyard to your right. The driver leads you through a small iron gate into the graveyard, past old, collapsed tombs and fallen grave markers. The walk is long, but at last you top one of the taller hills and, some distance below, see three small, lonely figures clustered around one seemingly insignificant tombstone. The three are small and, as you approach, somehow familiar. One is small and fiery, the next dark and quiet, and the third seems to glow slightly in the moonlight--and you smile sadly in recognition. But before you think to greet them, the text on the tombstone draws you short. It reads:

Here Lies
Malefica Lamia Occasus
Commander of the Winged Monkeys, Ruler of the Winkies, and Witch of the West
Survived by three children (father unknown)

May her life
in the after
be happier.

The revelation shocks you into silence. You've heard of her, of course. Who hasn't? And you'd had plenty of clues, of course. But somehow, you were expecting something different. Something more sinister.

You look at the children, more closely now. Mia can't be older than five, and seems to be exhausted from crying, leaning against her older sister. Cassie merely stares blankly, holding a single white flower, and Mal sits nearby, prodding a rock with a stick, over and over again.

Other than the three of them, the taxi driver and yourself, the graveyard is entirely empty. And silent.

A seeming eternity passes before Cassie places the flower quietly at the foot of the gravestone and turns, gathering Mia and nodding to Mal, who stands, dusts himself off, and follows along behind. The three pass within a hairsbreadth of you and continue on, oblivious to your presence.

"Hardly seems fair, does it?" asks the driver. "This is her funeral, after all. Should there not be a priest here, tending to the grave? A wreath of flowers? A line of weeping spectators to offer those children strength?"

You frown. "But the Wicked Witch was....well..."

The taxi driver waits for you to finish before speaking. "Evil? Intensely disliked? Wicked, perhaps? Of course she was. And I suspect she made a poor mother, as well. But she was their mother." He watches the three children slowly disappear over the next rise, as the twilight deepens, and then continues. "Do you know what the witch was most afraid of?"

You dredge your memories for likely suspects. "Water?"

"No. No... fears are not always so logical. She spent her whole like avoiding baths, drinking frog blood and discouraging the production of fountains. And so, in time, she came to accept her...handicap...and move on. No, not water. The witch feared what anyone fears. Darkness. The unknown."

"The Whizzer fears the same thing, and to guard against it he misuses the power of the slippers. He is opening holes between universes, and the seams are starting to show. He does not know the power he wields well, though, and he makes mistakes."

"You must take back the slippers from him, but you also must not be tempted to use them. You must protect them, and keep them safe from those who wish to use their powers, for any purpose. I warn you now--there is...another. Someone else who wishes to use the slippers, and I am afraid it will not be long before they show themselves. When that happens, you must be ready."

"It is not merely this world that is at stake, adventurer. Those portals link to every universe...including your own. Do not think that a "Game Over" screen would be acceptable. It is likely you would not survive."

Perry's warning comes back to you now, and you turn once more towards the taxi driver. "Why do the children want the slippers?" you ask, thoughtfully.

"Why don't you ask them yourself?" asks the driver.

And with that, you wake as someone tugs urgently on your right arm. "Whaddisit?" you ask, a little disoriented.

"Quiet," says Dirk. "I looked outside the cave a little while ago, and I saw something that concerns me."

You follow Dirk quietly to the edge of the cave and look out. Dirk points upwards towards the battlements of the Whizzer's castle. Following his arm, you see the unmistakable forms of a trio of Peepers, gazing down at you.

"They've been watching us since dawn," says Dirk. "The Whizzer knows we're here."

You start to sweat, it's really hot here.
"Amigo, amigo come on wake up! We're at my house, you can't stay in the car. It will get much to hot in there."
Looking around you see you are in front of an old 'house', three crows are sitting on the roof top. The heat and the exhaustion are probably the reason you fell asleep during the ride. What a nightmare, you decide to never watch a movie based on A Christmas Carol again.

>step out of taxi

After opening the door you put one foot on the ground as you want to get out of the car. Ouch, the ground is scorching hot and you don't wear shoes or socks. The driver sees what's going on and with a smile on his face he goes into the house. He comes back with a pair of sandals, which he gives to you. The sandals are obviously made out of old car tyres.
"Thanks my friend." you say as you put the sandals on. He gestures you to follow him into the house. In the house it's surprisingly cool.
"These sandals are great, I hardly felt the heat."
"Yes I know, I made them myself from the best radial tyres there are. You can run in them at a speed of over 200 miles an hour without loosing grip." Well that is very convenient!
He leads you to the living room, there are four people there.
"Meet my family," he says "This is my father Manuel, my mother Juanita, my sister Rosa and my great grandmother Ptula. My name is Manny, what's yours?"
"Just call me A.G., your great grandmother has a strange name. Where does it originate from?"
"She's one of the last full blood Aztec descendants."

The old lady is sleeping. Manny leaves the room to get some drinks. You try to speak with the other family members but they don't understand English. Manny returns with a bottle of tequila, glasses, salt and lemon parts. He fills the glasses and puts some salt on his right hand. After licking the salt he drinks his glass empty and bites in a lemon part. You do the exact same thing. Creepers, that's a strong drink!

"Please tell me about the solar eclipse Manny."
"I can tell you only what I know. It's not a normal eclipse, in a few days all the planets and all of their moons will be in allignment with the sun. This will cause an abnormality in the gravity field. According to the old Aztec legends, the earth will leave it's orbit around the sun and will be launched into the galaxy. The sunlight will become dimmer and dimmer, all life on earth will be extinguished. There's only one way to prevent this, according to the legends. There's a temple here in Mexico, it will be the centre of the gravitation singularity. If the right rituals are performed there, the earth will stay in it's orbit."
"Do you know where to find this temple?"
"There are many temples around and no one knows which is the right temple!"
"When will this allignment occur precisely?"
"Nobody knows for sure, because the eclipse is nearing, the planets are moving in a rather erratic way. It will happen in the next few days though."
"Does Bistro à l'Aztec mean anything to you?"
"It doesn't ring a bell, but maybe you can ask Ptula when she's awake. Come, let's have another drink."

You have a few more drinks and Ptula opens her eyes. She's staring at you with interest.
"Ptula, do you know what is meant by Bistro à l'Aztec?"

Manny translates the question, Ptula's eyes are wide open, now she starts repeating B'tro L'ateque over and over again. You look at Manny.
"B'tro L'ateque is a temple about 150 miles away from here, Ptula remembers now this temple has something to do with the eclipse."
She takes a pendant from her neck and gives it to you, then she falls asleep again.

>look pendant

The pendant is a green jade in the shape of a bullet.
"Manny, can you take me to the temple?"
"I can but I would have to upgrade the suspension of the beetle. The problem is, I'm a bit short on cash."

>give Manny the gold card

"That surely will help. Follow me, I'll show you the guest room so you can have a nap while I go out to find the necessary parts."
In the guest room you lay down on the bed and you open the comic book and start to re-read your adventures in the land of OS.
Finally you arrive at the part where you clicked your heels. The picture shows you are gone and the silver slippers are still there. Mia is re-entering the room.....
Worn out by the tequila and the events of the day you doze off.

>


Bernard

You awake in darkness. Blinking, you lift your head from your desk and look up at your screen. The glow from the monitor fills the room, a single user prompt blinking lazily at you.



>Stand up

You stand and stretch wearily. From the kinks in your neck and spine and the darkness outside it's clear you've been sleeping for some hours, slumped onto your desk. While blood rushes to your feet, you spin a slow circle to regain your bearings. To the north is the door to your bathroom and to the northwest is a closet. To the west is the kitchen.

There is a partially curtained window to the south, and east is the exit to your apartment. Near the middle of the room is a chair and a small television.

>Enter bathroom

You walk into the bathroom and turn on the light. While your eyes adjust to the sudden light, you turn left towards the sink, turn on the faucet and splash some cold water over your eyes. Refreshed, you slide your gaze upwards to the mirror above the sink. You look exhausted. You see something poking out of your right pocket.

>Examine pocket

In your pocket you find a portable game console (with an active firewall blocking internet access,) an emerald, a knife, and a tiny scale model of the RFA Retainer.

>Examine Retainer

It's an ugly little ship with a single smokestack, two sails and a cluttered foredeck. Originally meant for passengers and cargo, it was repurposed to carry munitions.

>Talk to retainer

Are you daft?

>Go south

You return to your living room. Your computer stands in the southwest corner, near the window.

>Turn on television

You turn on the t.v. and wait for the screen to light. Unfortunately, there's nothing on. Every channel is filled either with static, or a test pattern.

>Turn off television

You turn off the t.v.

>Look out window

You open the curtains and look outside. You can't see anything: it seems the entire neighborhood is cloaked in darkness. There are no lights and no movement as far as you can see in any direction.

>Look at computer screen

Examining the computer, you're surprised to find each of your most recent actions described in minor detail. Somehow, it seems you're still playing the game.

>Go East

Deciding you need a walk, you open the door to your apartment and walk through. Turning to close the door behind you, you're surprised to find it's no longer there.

You're standing in the middle of a large field full of poppies. From behind you you hear a shout, and turning you see Dirk running towards you at full tilt.

Before you can ask any questions, Dirk hands you a pill and instructs you to swallow it, quickly. You comply.

Dirk looks both relieved and angry. "Where have you been? One moment you were here, the next you were gone!"

"Dirk, where exactly are we?"

Dirk looks troubled. "I'm afraid things have been a bit of a mess since you left. Mia, Cassie and Mal went in to face the Whizzer alone. Michael and Lord o'Scars are down at the gate, fending off the Whizzer's Flying Monkey Pirates. As for Pepe....he's not doing so well." He nods towards the middle of the patch of poppies. "Even with the pills Sock cooked up, I'm not going in there without a hazmat suit."

"Pills?" you ask.

"Right." returns Dirk. "We got about halfway through the castle before stumblng across this field. Pepe walked right in the middle of a bunch of poppies and fell asleep. I managed

to get out in time, and Sock was able to cook up a temporary remedy. We were still working on what to do about Pepe when you arrived."

You shake your head in utter confusion. "Dirk, I'm worried. My dreams are starting to merge with my real life, and I'm not sure what's happening anymore. A few hours ago I was convinced that Mia was a two-thousand year-old vampire, that she managed to kill the wizard, and that I'd been extemporaneously sent home with a thank you note and another inexplicable quest. I've fallen asleep countless times since then, I've had at least two encounters with random portals, and frankly I'm not sure any of this is anything more than a deranged fantasy."

Dirk looks decidedly worried. "Just how long have you been standing in this field, anyway?" he asks. Suddenly more determined, he presses on. "The Whizzer isn't defeated yet, adventurer. If you've already hit two portals, that should convince you already. And I can assure you Mia isn't a vampire."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Well, I thought the affinity towards sunlight was a dead giveaway myself, but maybe it's just how quickly she devoured those garlic pasties the other day." He grins. "Really, a vampire? That was the best your addled brain could come up with?"

Feeling foolish, you look down at your feet. "What do you suppose we should do now?"

"Well, I may not be the best of strategists, but when a plan goes all screwball like this, I usually find it makes sense to withdraw as quickly as possible."

"But the children are still in there, fighting the Whizzer. Alone," you remind him.

"Yes well...maybe it's time to cut your losses? In case you haven't noticed, those three can handle themselves pretty nicely on their own. It's the rest of us who are in trouble here."

Dirk's tone disturbs you. "I don't think so, Dirk. Find a way to get them out of there."

As you speak, a portal opens Through it you can see your Mexican guest room.

>Enter portal

You begin walking through the portal. "Wait a second!" Shouts Dirk. "Where do you think you're going?"

"The B'tro L'ateque," you respond quickly. "Whatever is about to happen, I need to be there when it does. And Dirk...make sure those children are safe when I return."

Dirk responds with quiet surprise before turning a solemn salute towards you. "Aye aye, captain," he returns in serious tones.

You enter the portal, and in a moment you are standing back in your guest room. It is morning, and from downstairs you can hear the clink of cutlery and the hiss of oil in a pan as breakfast is being made. You head inside. It's time to get moving.

>Enter kitchen. Juanita, busy at the stove, turns to greet you. The back door is open & you can just see Manuel, Rosa & Ptula sitting round a table on a small terrace eating breakfast. Juanita smiles & gestures you to go outside & join her family. A few minutes later she emerges from the kitchen to set down in front of you a plate of delicious egg & bacon fajitas & a cup of hot steaming coffee.

After everyone's finished Rosa, Manuel & Ptula quickly clear the table & retire back into the house just as Manny appears holding a scroll. "I hope you slept well my friend as we have a long day ahead of us" he says "the car is now ready & you may need this again". He reaches into his pocket & hands you back the Gold card.

Manny now unrolls the scroll & lays it out flat on the table. It seems to be an ancient geographical map of Mexico which also marks the locations of the many Aztec temples. "I didn't know my great grandmother had this until last night" Manny says & points to one of the temple sites. "& she seems sure that this one is B' tro L'Ateque, it is about 150 miles due East from here close to the Guatemalan border.

As you can see it is located in a vast area circled by a river on the Mexican side & impassable from the Guatamalan side due to this mountain range. "I will only be able to take you as far as the river, but if I take you to this point here, the temple is only a few miles away once you've reached the other side."

You accept Manny's offer, thank & say goodbye to his family & jump into the now very bouncy taxi. As Manny starts the ignition & sets off down the dusty road you feel in your pocket to check your inventory items:
portable games consol (internet access blocked),
Gold card,
knife,
shoehorn
sun stone
moon stone
an envelope
comic book
small model of ammunitions ship,
green jade bullet shaped pendant
scroll showing locations of Aztec temples
crowbar
emerald
Aztec statue
You look at the emerald & wonder whether it was the same one attached to the crowbar. You try to recall Michael's story about the Aztec princess. Could this somehow have some significance to the quest you are about to undertake?

>

REM -- chrissie, I see your "in progress" Edit Reason -- are you writing more to add to your post?

REM Hi Becky, I was but have now finished!

REM Thanks! I'm working on an idea. I think the below is right for the inventory held in this world:

A crowbar
An Aztec statue
A shoehorn
A knife
A sun stone
A moon stone
An envelope with "Kind regards, Glinda" written on it
Portable games console (internet access blocked by active firewall)
Gold card
Knife
Small model of RFA Retainer, ammunitions ship,
Green jade bullet shaped pendant
Emerald
Scroll that contains a map of Aztec temple locations
Comic book of The Wizard of Oz

I THINK that's now everything. Some interesting potential combinations here. Hmmmm....

You travel for hours on dusty mountain roads. The roads seem very crowded, even as the battered taxi winds higher and higher up the mountain.

You pass a handsome young Aztec adventurer, wearing a white loin cloth and holding a diary with the words: ‘Little Serpent’s Codex’ on it. You pass a middle-aged blonde adventurer accompanied by a very tall man who is the living image of a picture of Java Man that you once saw in a history book. Last of all, you pass an odd-looking adventurer in cowboy boots and white cowboy hat, carrying a skull and a bottle of poisonous hair tonic.

Finally, you reach the river. Manny pulls over and you get out of the taxi. As you bid him a grateful farewell, you notice a birthday card with a picture of a Mariachi on it on the driver’s seat of the taxi.

>Get birthday card.

“May I have that card?” you ask politely. Manny grins and hands you the card and a battered pen.

You write: "Happy Birthday, Pepe. From a Secret Admirer” on the card and hand the pen back.

Manny shakes your hand and wishes you good luck. “Since you are the only passenger who ever borrowed a pen and then remembered to return it,” says Manny, “I will make a suggestion. Behind that rock you will find an ancient SPECS .001 machine. Take advantage of it.” Then he gets in the cab and drives away.

East is the river, now merely a stream. North is the source of the river, bubbling up between two trees and over scattered pebbles, some of which look gold beneath the sunlit water. West is the road down the mountain. South is a rock formation.

>Go South.

Behind a tall red rock you find a battered old pan with red dust in it. Next to it is a large machine, about the size of an industrial-sized refrigerator, with a barcode symbol and a hole into which you can insert things.

>Examine SPECS .001

The machine begins to rock back and forth, emitting beeps that, in a non-machine, would seem welcoming.

“I am the Latest Version of The Speculator” says a commanding female voice, coming from within the machine. “I am perfect and have never been superseded by an ‘Improved' version. Insert items for speculations, item combination advice, and red herring removal.”

You decide not to tell SPECS that you have already seen a much more recent, smaller version of The Speculator.

>Insert crowbar.

"I speculate that this could be used as a wizard's staff," says SPECS. You take the crowbar back.

>Insert birthday card.

“I advise you to combine birthday card with envelope with ‘Kind Regards, Glinda’ written on it,” says SPECS. You take back the card.

>Insert Aztec statue.

“I advise you to combine Aztec statue (covered in moldy butter and magically imported from the depths of an Ozzian handbag) with emerald,” says SPECS. You put the statue back in your pocket.

>Insert pan of red dust.

“I advise you to combine pan of feardust with firewall (after removing Tony Hawk Pro Silver Skates game cartridge from portable games console)” says SPECS. You take back the pan of feardust.

>Insert gold card.

“This is a red herring. I’ll get rid of it,” says SPECS.

>Threaten SPECS.

“Hey, that’s not a red herring! I want that back!” you shout threateningly.

“Danger, danger, old buffer overflow!” says SPECS. You watch in horror as dozens of miniature, wizened old men jump out of the SPECS machine hole and start to tie you up with miniature ropes.

>Use crowbar on SPECS .001.

You bash the machine with the crowbar. That stops the old buffer overflow, but the machine still doesn’t return your gold card.

>Use knife on SPECS .001.

You can chip at the surface a bit with the knife, but all it does is make tiny dents. The old buffers, however, seeing that you are armed, turn and run down the mountain away from you.

>Use small model of RFA Retainer, ammunitions ship, on SPECS .001.

This cannot be used on SPECS .001.

>Insert small model of RFA Retainer, ammunitions ship.

You put the RFA Retainer into the hole in the SPECS .001 machine. You then hear a series of muffled explosions from within the machine. Followed by louder explosions.

Smoke begins pouring out the hole in the machine. “I am the Latest Version of The Speculator” says the primitive, robotic voice that now issues forth. “I am...perfect and have never been... superseded by an ‘Improved” version. Would you like me to sing you a song?”

“Sure, sing me a song, SPECs,” you say. More smoke pours out. You find you are actually feeling sorry for SPECS.

There is a robotic humming sound, and you then hear a simple tune.

“You’ll never see a dark cloud hanging ‘round me,
Now there is only blue sky to surround me,
There’s never been a gray day since you found me,” sings SPECS.

Its voice begins to falter, becoming deeper, slower, but it manages one more line of the song.

“Everything…I…touch…is…turning…to…gold…” SPECS keels over on one side.

Within the twisted metal you see the Gold Card, now melted into a lump of gold plastic, and the smokestack from the RFA Retainer, now the only identifiable remnant of that once proud ship.

>_

REM
I seem to have lost track of what happened to the rancid butter. I kind of fancied that being in someone's pocket.

By the way, did you all know that skunks are a member of the weasel family? No? See, edutainment at its best!

END REM

REM Wasn't the rancid butter in the purse? Does this mean that the magically imported Aztec statue should now be covered in rancid butter?

REM Bernard used all the rancid butter to make nose plugs earlier
on with cut up pieces of the orange feather boa. The greasy handbag is still hanging in a leafy tree outside Glinda's house.

>Take gold plastic.

>Take miniature smokestack.

>Go North.

Manny has gone. To the East is the stream, to the West is the road down the mountain.

>Go North again to reach the source of the river bubbling up between 2 trees.

>Look more closely at the scattered pebbles you saw earlier gleaming beneath the sunlit water. They do indeed seem to be gold.

>Use the gold plastic on the pebbles. Immediately a wisp of mist rises & slowly manifests into a transparent & ethereal image of a gold female clad in flowing robes. She seems to be clutching something in one of her hands. She holds her hand out to you and opens it to reveal a solid looking star stone.

>Take star stone. The lady fades into a wisp which disappears back into the pebbles.

>Go South. Just then you see what looks like a bird carrying something flying towards you. As it nears you can see it's Cedric holding the handbag. He eventually lands on your shoulder & you take the handbag. "It was mentioned 3 times" he said "I thought you might have need of it"
You look in the handbag. Yuck! it's full of mold. You ratch through & find the 2 latin - english dictionary pages which are now moist & green. You look again & find the wire retainer also covered in mold which you take out & put in your pocket.

"How did you get here Cedric?" you ask. "through one of the many portals that keep opening up" he replies "it's about to close, but I thought you might be glad of my services as well as the handbag".

You quickly combine the birthday card with the envelope & hand it to Cedric. "Thank you Cedric" you say "this is important, please can you hurry back through the portal & give this to Pépé". At that Cedric takes the envelope with birthday card enclosed & speedily flies away.

>Examine statue. It's an Aztec-like statue of a young womaan with one emerald eye missing & it's also very moldy.

>Use emerald with Aztec statue. The emerald doesn't fit.

>Examine statue again. This time you look at the base & see a small inscription. 'Made in Chinajá.'

>Look east. There's a small stream. It looks as if you could easily wade through it but on the opposite bank there is what appears to be a bubbling mass of mud. You pick up a heavy boulder from the ground & toss it over to the other side of the stream. It lands & is quickly consumed by the mud. Oh!

>

REM -- so would the contents of the handbag be covered in rancid butter, do you think?

REM Given its current environment, I suspect the contents of the handbag are now covered in rancid, moldy butter. Come to think of it, I suggest we avoid going near that tree in the future...

For a moment I was worried all my madcap toying with the bounds of time and space had confused all of us into utter befuddlement. I'm glad to know you were all just busy cataloguing our inventory.

REM I enjoy madcap toying.

It keeps us on our toes.

BTW, the thread will soon be long enough that we will have to come up with an in-game reason to switch to a new thread. Perhaps after the B'tro L'ateque temple?

What did we leave in the purse? Two pages from the Latin dictionary and The Retainer, (wire and plastic version) correct? Maybe we could poison The Whizzer with the retainer. How long does it take ingested mold to kill someone, I wonder?

REM We've got those now!